Should I move on? I also need opinions, I love this guys obviously. After two years.... I'm stuck..

A year ago I met this amazing guy. He was funny, cute, made me laugh and he was my best friend. A month or two after we met, he asked me out during school. When we dated we had such a good time until a month into it he messed up and was flirting with a girl younger then myself who happened to be a friend. he asked for her number and the next day when my friends called me and told me what they witnessed, I broke up with him and went out with my awesome mother. I gave him a chance to explain two days later and after he did, I took him back. We lasted another two months until he broke up with me around October last year (2012). I was so upset that I went out with a girl I barely knew (who is know my best friend literally) and I hooked up with someone he happens to be close with. It hurt him and I hadn't realized what I'd done until I realized that I had seen his face and how upset he was. It took almost two months to gain his trust and for me to make it up to him. But when we got back together he had been communicating (flirting) with same girl that I broke up with him for. I made a big deal about it, texted the girl told her to leave him alone.. We got in a fight about it but eventually he saw it was hurting me. Around January we were finally getting back on track to where we were in the beginning. HAPPY. Around February we ended up having sex for the first time ( his and mine). It was big for me. But two weeks later he broke up with me saying he didn't know why. I cried for about two whole weeks and became angry when I realized that he was messing with another one of my friends (LONG STORY SHORT: She's crazy and he set himself in a trap because she harassed him for a month). One day when I finally got over it I was hanging out with a friend of mine when he drove over to our school and showed up with his friends. He took me away and dropped his friends off and apologized asking if I was still mad at him and hell I was but obv we got together again only for it to go bad within a day because the crazy girl fought me in school and my mom pressed charges against her. She left me alone afterward but me and him ended up breaking up two weeks after that. Then soon after the break he found me during school and told me he did something bad. He hooked up with another one of my close friends that I'd been friends with since 6th grade. I didn't talk to him or her for about two weeks until I gave him another chance... He was leaving for basic training soon and broke up with right before he left saying he couldn't deal with my emotions because I was upset I couldn't be with him his last day in town due to my family situations. I didn't say good bye to him because I was so hurt that he broke up with me for nothing really. He cursed me out we argued and it was the last time we talked for three months until school started again.Wegotbacktogetherandbrokeupfourtimes.My birthday was yesterday and he ignored me completely and I'm really hurt by that.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • He didn't set himself in a trap. He willingly ditched you. Deliberately. Stop telling yourself things that make it seem like he's the innocent guy. This is why I tell people to wait before having sex. It WAS major for you. Your virginity is designed to bond you with one very special man. This guy ain't him. Unfortunately now you are bonded on a deep level with this jerk, (Because he was your first) and you will be, for life. You can bond with another man, but not like how you bonded with this guy, unfortunately.

    The cure, of course, is to find a man, who is loving, caring, and connects with you on a deep level. He can heal your heart, and you can learn to trust again. I am deeply sorry that you continue giving this jerk of a man chances. He does not deserve them. He has a ton of maturing left to do.

    You made a mistake... Now it's time to move on. You CANNOT trust him. Charisma does not equal honor.

    Stop giving him chances, you are only hurting your own heart. Please. Just stop.

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    THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE
    • Thanks for the honest advice. Whenever I explain our relationship people who know him say they don't believe it because he's so nice so I have to pull out evidence. He also spent plenty of money me but it didn't make me feel as special as true love and affection would. It seems as though whenever I decide to move on with my life he notices and wants to come around. Thank god I have awesome friends that are willing to kick his ass to keep him away.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Time to learn from history. Fool me once, fool me twice, fool me n+1 times just doesn't bring any good.

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  • Move on. You don't need this drama.

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What Girls Said 3

  • Sweetie, lick your wounds and forget this lying coward. It appears, and although I am one smart cookie when it comes to relationships, your situation doesn't take any rocket scientist to see that: "Once a cheater, ALWAYS a cheater."

    We always give the one we love another chance when something like this happens to us, but when they turn around and continuously "screw us in the butt," it's time to kiss their asses good-bye, and move the hell on.

    This "on again off again" soapbox saga that he has had you involved in, his what I call a "pattern," and so is his "philandering ways." He is one of those "sick dick"guys who will never change their evil wandering ways.

    BTW: Happy birthday, sweet girl.

    And don't be hurt. Consider it a birthday present that he DIDN'T toot your horn yesterday. If he had acknowledged you, "10 bucks in a card", says he would have started up the "festivities again", and it would have ended up a case off: "The party's over."

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    • Thanks :)

    • I always say: Today's men are sporadic and unpredictable, and many times "emotionally unstable" when it comes to a relationship.

  • I agree with the first opinion below but have some additional insights. First, be very careful about who you have sex with because for most if us women it is a bonding experience, even if he's not your first. Second, be particularly careful with the ones who care less than you do. I am learning this the hard way for the second time. Before my long marriage I dated a guy on and off for 6 years. Thank God I saved my virginity for my ex-husband. After I realized I wasted 6 years of my life on him, I vowed never again - no more lingering - ever! I kept that vow and was with my exhusband for many years. Then, after getting divorced, I dated without incident until one day I met a guy who woke up something inside me that had long been dormant. Amazing chemistry that made me feel 16 again and forget all about all I had known before. What exhusband? The power of that awakening led me to break my promise to myself and date this guy on and off for over 2 years. Now he's told me he loves me more than once but left me without explanation. I blame myself for letting this happen again. Learn from my mistakes - forget this guy and only love those who really love you and show it by their actions, not just words!

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  • ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT LOL... leave him to his wh*res.. they deserve each other, I do not think you deserve that shyt.. Ignore him and his "friends" lol.. what a mess. DO YOU. IGNORE HIM AND IS DRAMA RIDDEN AZZ.. WOW.. ugly.. not attractive.. at all.. ew..

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