Should I go the extra mile for him?

I have posted my problem a while ago. This is an extension of that. However, I will give you a brief summary of my issue.

My & my EX were in a relationship throughout our 2 years in college. Family approved. We were supposed to get engaged this year. However, everything is not as hunky dory as it seems. He is a guy with an attention seeking disorder. He would make up dirty stories about other women (his friends I knew) that would hurt me. He loved the attention & the possessiveness that came from it, completely oblivious to the fact that he hurt me bitterly. He once even told me that he cheated on me with 2 women on the same night. He told me even that story is made after one week of putting me through pain. He loved the attention he got from my sorries and begging. He would make an issue out of the most tiny thing. He would be harsh & rude and even abuse me with words. It stung me like anything but I would always be the one saying sorry & ended up begging him. He got a kick out of it. He loved that kind of attention. I would cry, but he would say my tears meant nothing to him. We are working in the same city away from our home now after college. Last year he lost his father to cancer. But his attitude towards me remained the same. This side was just with me, with everybody else he was a sweetheart. My dad has been diagnosed with cancer. This Christmas I went home after almost 6 months. Seeing my dad bald & weak with mom breaking down was really really difficult. On Christmas night he made some issue, started being harsh & rude, broke up with me, blocked me & never communicated with me again. I thought he would realize in a few days it was unnecessary, but he didn't till date he hasn't even tried to communicate with me. The only guy who I opened to about my problems just left me hanging there.

Now his mobile connection is in my name. I have a scheme at my place of work which gives real good calling rates. So I took the scheme for him in my name. Now, he wants it in his name. His room-mate keeps calling me to check with the office service provider outlet to check if it can be done. I checked with them they said that it cannot be done there I would need to go a city outlet convert it into pre-paid number in my name, then convert it into his name (which means multiple trips to the outlet). While all this is his need he hasn't even once requested me to do the same. His friend keeps calling/texting me for the same.

While my heart asks me to go out of the way and do it for him. My mind says, why should I go the extra mile for him when he dumped & blocked me, completely abandoning me when I need him the most right now.

What do you guys think I should do?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Lol wtf. You don't need him infact he sounds like he's doing more harm then good and he did you a favor by breaking up with you because you should have broken up with him a long time ago! He lied about cheating on you and he mulipulated you for fun and you just let him. Like when someonedoes stuff like that Iits not really called love its called useing you for there own pleasures, and I know you said he has a attention disorder but that is not normal behavior for someone even with a disorder excially towards his girlfriend. Do us both a favor and never say sorry or beg for a guy when its his fualt. He totally just messed with your brain and you let him. Anywayyys about the phone thing I think you should do it so he knows you don't care even if you do enough not to do it. Do not go back with him, this is an emotionally unstable relationship and you deserve to be treated with respect and like the women that you are. Not a dog that begs for attention for their master.


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • Ignore him totally about this calling issue, and about everything else. Ditto for his friends; block them if they insist on beating the drum for him. You don't owe any of them any consideration after his behavior.

  • Don't do a fucking thing for this asshole. Cancel the phone outright. Let him figure it out.


What Girls Said 2

  • He never loved you , I'm sorry, but this is something you should already know by yourself. He lied to you so much and cheated and whatever, he doesn't respect you. You shouldn't let yourself to be treated like a piece of shit.This boy doesn't deserve you. I really can't even imagine what he did to you like why are you still doubting if you should move on or not. Of course you should. Save yourself from him. I also feel bad for you father and hope that he will get well soon. I can't understand what kind of problem does your ex have like why did he feel the need to treat you that way.Please open your eyes and move on,don't give him attention even if he tries to communicate with you,ignore him. You don't need someone in your life who does these things to you.Forget about him, don't waste your time with him or his friends. If you keep thinking about him and if you keep doubting if you should move on or not then you are degrading yourself girl. What about your pride? How can you NEED him? How do you need someone who hurt you in so many ways in life.

  • Personally I wouldn't go the extra mile for him.

    If he won't even personally ask you, then why should you go the extra mile for him?

    My personal experience:

    I've been in a harsh relationship that ended up with him leaving me high and dry when I needed him the most as well... He too blocked me, made no effort to contact me, etc. until it came to something he, in his words that he said through a friend, NEEDED. I went the extra mile for my ex, and he left me feeling unappreciated in my efforts for him, used, and even more hurt than I was before. But that's just my experience...


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