so me and boyfriend recently broke up, a month or 2 ago, one of the hurtful things he said to me over the phone is 'at one point, I did want to get married'
that was pretty hurtful.
less than a year ago I was the one to break off engagement because his family became stifling (demanding some personal information from me) and at that time, boyfriend and I had a discussion. I stated I saw flaws and if we don't work it out, I don't believe it will last.
I was right. He didn't bother much with the solution or plan we had. He just didn't want to acknowledge the issue.
After he said that, he said something along the lines 'I don't want to hurt you' and I responded that I've been hurting for quite some time (because he refused or ignored the problems in our relationship)
how do you guys get over what is said in a post break up situation? obviously I'm still healing. It's tough since I was with him for some time and then he goes from 'i want to marry you' to 'I want to see other people' basically.
subconsciously I have sensed this and the last month was worst, I just didn't think I loved him because doesn't seem he cared and started talking to other guys.
but I find him and his friends especially put me down a lot at the end although I did not say anything to his friends at all. he turned into a complete opposite of what he showed me.
Most Helpful Girl
I have often found people don't really answer questions on here. Some of the guys on here have a genuine hatred towards women and women towards men, so no matter what the situation was some men on here will answer with a negative response. Don't take it too personally.
Take a step back from it all and take a deep breath. He asked you to marry him and you felt deep inside that this was not right for you. I know you say it was down to his family and some of the things they said, but lets be honest. When you marry a guy, you are also marrying their family. If your boyfriend didn't defend you against them now, imagine what it would be like later on.
I think this guy just was not right for you. If he did not want to talk openly about an issue, the lack of communication will only get worse.
I'm not going to lie to you either and say you will get over the hurtful things he said or the break up right away, because you won't. No matter how many issues you had, you still had a relationship with him. You will even go through the phase where you fantasise the relationship, where you make it seem better than it was.
I realized the hard way, that your feelings are the only thing that matter. If this guy wasn't making you feel good, or was making you feel worse than when you were single then he is NOT the guy for you.
The only advice I can give you is to move on, stand your ground and yes whilst he may bad mouth you like my ex did, there is a reason you are leaving this guy. Throw all your efforts in work or something else and find the life you had when you were single. Any issues he had with you he will have in the next relationship and if he isn't willing to work on them, I can bet you anything he will have another broken relationship.
Keep moving on and don't waste time. You will find someone that actually appreciates you. :)1