Is 6 months too long to wait to get back out there?

soooo my ex and I broke up about 6 months ago, after a solid 3 years. I mean I've flirted a little with the few women I still had any sort of relationship with during/after my relationship with my ex, but I can't seem to take the next step. I want to, but there's something within that kicks me in the stomach and tells me to stop being stupid. just wondering if this happens to anyone else or am I the only one? 3 years and then 6 months following that is a long time, I don't even remember how to talk to a woman, especially those I don't know.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Wow, 6 months?

    No not too long at all, If something is stopping you, you are not ready!

    3 years is a long relationship, and everyone takes a different time to feel ready for the market!

    You talk to women by being yourself, how you would talk to your freinds, with some wooing added!

    When me and my ex stopped seeing each other, it was 2 years untill I went on a date.

    I know to some that seems a long time, and I'm not saying that's how long it will take you.

    I just didn't feel like it, for a long time I didn't find other men attractive.

    Glad I stayed single for so long, I started to enjoy it. had a fair amount of heartbreak so having a long break from relationships was good for me. It got to the point where I then couldn't imagine a relationship but did want the closer male company I didn't get from friends.

    I started dating again, a couple people it wouldn't have worked out.

    Then I met my now boyfriend, I was so resistant as I had been alone so much. But he managed to very slowly woo me to the point of no return and I absolutely adore him.

    6 months really isn't a long time. Give yourself time to enjoy being single. When the time comes it will feel right, there are no rules.

    Go with your gut feeling. Better to be someone who is ready to put every thing into a relationship than someone that is still not quite over the last one. It's fairer on the new person, and fairer for you.

    I actually had a one night stand after 2 years being single, I never do that, I hadn't had sex in 2 years! But I think it actually helped me move on even more and realize I wanted to date again. Then I took it slow with my boyfriend, as I didn't want to be hurt again. We went on lots of dates and it was well over a month before we slept together.

    I'm not saying a one night stand is right for you, it can make people feel pretty crappy. But in some cases it does help.

    But for you right now, I think you should take all pressure off yourself giving your self a time limit as when to feel ready. You will know when you are.

    For now, get out with your mates, have a laugh and talk to new girls. Talk to them like you just want them as a mate, to help you gain your confidence of speaking to new women.

    Good luck.

    • thank you for taking the time to share your experience, relative to mine. this is probably the most female attention I've received in the last 6 months LOL. its not that I'm giving myself a time limit, I sort of alienated my friends while I was in that relationship and now I spend most of my time alone, which is getting really old.

    • I'm actually a man.

    • haha no sorry I'm jk. Yeah sometimes we let mates take a back seat when we find someone. Not right though, hey will always be there for us so we need to nurture the freindship. Proper friends you will be able to get that back again. I spent so much time on my own when I hurt my back as I couldn't do anything let alone leave the house. It's good to enjoy your own company. But definitely good to pick up the phone ring a friend old or new and see if they want to meet up. I bet it's getting old :/

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What Girls Said 2

  • 3 years is a long relationship... think about it this way... if you were riding a horse, fell off and broke your leg, would you jump back on the horse or get a cast for your leg? Personally.. I'd choose the cast so that it would have time to heal... up to you though, if you're ready you're ready but I'd be wary of jumping in too soon.

  • that seems perfectly normal. after a relationship of at least 1.5-2 years usually it takes at least 6 months to get your heart cleared up and in order again. GIve yourself time, there is nothing wrong with you, you can't force yourself to want to date. It will happen when it happens. Just go about your life, you don't constantly need to be dating. seeing women. You can actually be enjoying your life friends/ work/ holidays. Sounds like it will be at least another 6 months until you will be ready to get back into the game, nothing wrong with that! Rushing into somethig when you are not ready means attracting evil bad people. you don't want this.


What Guys Said 1

  • You HAVE been kicked in the stomach; it's normal to hesitate to take a chance on anyone again for a long time. 6 months to get over a break up is not exceptional.Take the time you need, and don't put pressure on yourself. Stick to women who have been friends before for now, just as you have been doing.


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