My boyfriend and I started dating a bit more than a year ago. He's never had a girlfriend before, or never even loved anyone before. I'm his first. We officially got together last early 2013 and everything was going very well. I'd never been that happy and satisfied in a relationship. I felt special because he's never committed to anyone before, he even introduced me to his family, who I even later on went on a trip with. Let's just say, our relationship is pretty serious. Last September, I had to move abroad for college. That's when things started going downhill. It was very hard to even talk to him while I was away. He was acting in such a careless way towards my feelings, it's like he was mad at me for some reason, maybe for leaving him there, I don't know, but we kept fighting every single day. It came in the way of my studies, I kept coming back home which is a five hour flight away by the way, even just for two days just to see him, I eventually had to drop out as I couldn't wait to go back home for Christmas I did not even show up to my exams. Until now, I don't know if it's because of him of because I truly did not like what I was studying. Anyway. I went back home, we fixed our issues. Everything went back to normal, even better. We got so much closer, it was impossible to 'break' us again. Earlier this month, we both moved abroad but for his studies now, and we live together. But here is the thing... a few days after first moving in with him, I found out that he cheated on me and lied to me several times earlier in our relationship. He cheated once. He made out with this girl when they were both completely wasted one day after me and him got into a fight while I was away. But the lies... He lied so many times. About going out with girls, as friends yes, but to me if he lies about such stupid things, what doesn't he lie about? I mean, if it's so innocent, why would he lie about it? Anyway, I won't get into too much detail but as you can imagine, it shattered my trust in a million pieces. I felt that I sacrificed SO MUCH for him, I even moved abroad again with him and MOVED IN with him, leaving everything behind and here I am, feeling like a fool. I know he loves me. I can see it, everyone can see it. I've had some of his friends from back home calling me telling me he begged them for help, for me to forgive him. I've seen him cry several times. I eventually calmed down with time and decided I should at least try to forgive him. things are getting better I guess but sometimes I just break down. I am completely paranoid. I have no trust in him. Our relationship is destroyed and I blame him for that. I feel that he took away from me the most beautiful thing I've ever had and there is no way to ever get it back. I could go on forever trying to describe what I feel, but I'll just stop here, I really need your help. I don't know what to do, or feel... And don't tell me to just move out. I can't... I'm stuck here for six months and I love him.
Most Helpful Girl
For this situation, in my opinion. whats LOVE got to do with it? Girly, if there is NO trust, you don't have a relationship. I know you're trying to hold on to what you once had, but that innocent and honest part of the relationship is gone. You have two choices here. either accept his apology and believe that he has changed, or break up with him and find someone who WON'T lie to you.
In my very personal opinion, I would drop that fool so fast. First of all, you sacrificed a lot to be with him. You even dropped out of school PROBABLY because you were over extending yourself for the relationship and now you have relocated with him, just to find out that he lied and cheated on you. I find lying to be one of the most intolerable things ever. I simply wouldn't be able to put that past a person. I don't think I would be able to trust someone like that again. so I would leave. I would find someone else to love because I know my own self worth.
But in the end, its your call. Good luck.1