Would you or do you cheat? Why?

Have you ever cheated on a boyfriend or girlfriend?

Did you come clean and tell them?

Or thought about it and stopped yourself?

Have you cheated on more than one person?

Why did you do it?

How did you feel after? Regrets?

What was the outcome?

Please explain your stories...

  • I am a serial cheater, I cheat all the time
    Vote A
  • I have cheated a few times
    Vote B
  • I have cheated once or twice
    Vote C
  • I would or have never cheated
    Vote D
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
Thank you for all the answers so far. The different answers and opinions are really interesting.

My opinion is I don't think cheating is right in a relationship. I think we have the choice if we put ourselves in the situation where it may happen and can prevent that. If someone really doesn't want to resist then I think you should break up first so as not to hurt anyone. If it does happen anyway people should come clean to give the partner a choice if they want to forgive or not.
I cheated when I was 16, I came clean. He made the choice to break up although forgave me in time. It made me feel selfish and I certainly hadn't considered his feelings by doing it. I felt guilty and ashamed. I thought about it and came close to doing it again with someone when I was 21, but stopped myself. I took myself out of the situation it could happen in and never spoke to that man again. I couldn't do it to another person.

I have never considered it again. Not even crossed my mind. I got cheated on by the same person 3 times, three separate women when I was 24, I found out about one of them inadvertantly but stayed with the guy, the other 2 only found out after we had broken up. I was angry and hurt. Since then and growing up a little more, I know there is no way I would ever do it to anyone and there must be something wrong with the relationship to consider it. I would never put myself in that situation.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes, I admit to being "one of those a statistics" that have cheated on a husband. But without making some lame excuse, I feel I had good cause. Problem is, it left me in this "three sided triangle" relationship for over a year, I didn't know whether I was coming or going...Or Who, I might say.

    I married a man who had found me on Facebook three years ago, and traveled out to Egypt to meet up. It went so well I returned to him three months later, where we tied the knot in Cairo. Three months later, with much strife and sour balls, I left for the states, going home and not intending to ever come back to him and the family again.

    We decided to give our long distance marriage another try, working together as a team this time, instead of battling one another with whatever had happened in Egypt while I was there. However, deep inside, I couldn't get past It. There were too many things that had happened, and I was feeling if I were to go back, it might be worse this time.

    In 2012, a man from a dating site, had found me. He was not a Muslim from Egypt, but a Coptic Christan. He had come over on a Green Card lottery five years before, and like my Muslim on Facebook, Jorge came across me on Badoo, and fell in love with me as well.

    I never expected anything to work out. It happened so fast. We made plans for him to come to Pennsylvania where I had been living, and the night he did, changed my course and---heart. I was falling in love with him, but knew I was hooked to a man out in another part of God's country. My head was in turmoil now, and I didn't know what I was going to do.

    From thence on, hubby and I had many problems. We broke up, got back together, and with this roller coaster ride I was taking, Jorge was on the back, holding on, going through the same stress as me. We had our Own personal "track record" as well that following year, and with both men riding my bumpy car, I was not only Not getting on a plane back to my husband in Egypt, but I wasn't going Anywhere with Jorge either, in our "mixed signal" relationship. At one point, I had even Lost Both "Allah And Jesus" all in one shot. It was a train wreck waiting to crash.

    2013 holidays came upon me, and it seemed I was Now staying with hubby. We made plans--- Again---for the tenth time for me to return, but to stay forever this time. I had broken off with Jorge then, for my own personal issues, and was relieved to think God had finally picked One for me. But I quickly learned, it was still going on, and the picking and choosing was Only Then----to end.

    I found myself back again with Jorge, But this time around, he was ready to commit, or so we shall see. He said the magic words every girl wants to hear, and with this, like this sign, I realized...it was over for my Muslim and me. Suddenly, when I had least expected it, we both knew deep down I was never coming back to Egypt------nor to him again. The test of time had now stopped, and------with no regrets.xx

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    • Thank you for your honesty and telling your experience.

    • You are so welcome..It should be a movie, this story..so confusing..What are anyone's chances of Marrying a Muslim in Egypt, and Now, soon to marry a Coptic Christan From Egypt, here near me?xx

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 24

  • I am guessing that a decent percentage of the people that say they wouldn't cheat, won't cheat, or don't cheat, are probably not being totally honest. It's not really something people admit. I also understand this makes me subject to my own remark.

    Would I cheat? No. If the relationship is at it's point where I want another woman and would even consider cheating, then the relationship is at it's end and I'm going to end it before I'd cheat. That's pretty much all there is to that.

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    • i agree with your rationalization

    • I'm glad you point out this makes subject to your remark! I think people are being honest, after all, the poll is anonymous, and you can answer the questio anonymous too, I don't see why anyone would feel the need to lie. Infact I think the same with most questions that can be anon. It would be pretty odd behavior if they did, although perhaps I always see the good and assume honesty... maybe there are some odd ones lying pointlessly x

  • Yes.

    Everyone is a cheater, monogamy is a social construct, and evidence supports the idea that humans actually 'dislike' it.

    Perhaps you haven't cheated physically, but you have cheated emotionally. If you haven't, you will in due time.

    I never told her, there was no reason to.

    Cheating is normal human behavior.

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    • Here you go Cheeseburgers! (:

      link

      PS. QA, This link is a present only for Cheeseburgers I don't care about your life's problems...

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    • Shall I rephrase... People look all the time, but they never touch. Don't know what your getting at with your '' Just "some" of the time, mm? '' I'm guessing you misunderstood what I said hense the rephrase. Thanks @Elfiegirl21 I'm glad you think that, although I'd be supprised if a lot of other women did think about other men sexually. Although in all fairness I have no idea.

    • Your right hand cheating on your left?

  • I have never cheated. It goes against my principles and personal code.

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  • I cheat because I love "new" and don't really think about getting caught but I also like romance. All the men in my family cheat which would make you think I'd want to break that but I think it kind of makes me think not cheating is like a very vanilla experience as oppose to the thrill of multiple girls in your life usually its just 2 at a time and then things get too complicated for it to be worth it.

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    • So when you say new, is it the excitement that makes you want to do it? What is you had an amazing girlfriend in everyway, would you risk it for 'new'? The new could be rubbish in bed and a rubbish person.

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    • step to start thinking about your actions before you cheat. You obviously know part of you doesn't want to do it. It makes a far more attractive and strong man to not do it than it does to give in and cheat. It's not surprising you worry about it happening to you when you do it to them, If it's so easy for you, why wouldn't it be so easy for a girlfreind.

    • lol wow going for blood with that pic comment. Honestly, I don't know to say that would make it less bad. I know it's not OK and I'm trying to change. Just thought I'd be honest.

  • I never have cheated...but all my relationship I have been cheated on at some point. NEVER had a relationship without the girls cheating kinda sad.

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    • Yes that is kinda sad, not everyone will do it though.

  • There is always a reason to cheat. The only thing you have to ask yourself is "is it worth doing?" if the answer is yes then you will never feel guilty and you would mind your girlfriend/boyfriend knowing.

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    • If someone thought 'it is worth cheating'; perhaps their partner isn't worth it to them. If someone wants to cheat it should be a signal something is wrong. Fancy being with someone and lying and cheating when you could have an amazing relationship one day where you wouldn't ever want to.

  • I would never cheat on my girlfriend I love her too much and do intend on marrying her later on in life

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  • No I would not cheat I would not enter into a committed relationship if I did not think I could handle temptation responsibly.

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    • good attitude to take. I think a lot of people think the could hadnle temtation, or the thought of possible temptation deosn't cross their mind at the time. This is a great way to look at things!

  • haven't ever cheated. I've always figured why cheat when I could just be single

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  • i have but I was younger and dumb, 10 years ago. I just ended up breaking it off

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    • one also might say that thinking about cheating is considered cheating because youve thought about it and maybe fantasized about

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    • ya things change, we get older, we aren't the same as we used to be. your thoughts about your boyfriend now will be different 10 years from now if you're together that long or they may be the same. I'm starting to think as I age and if I'm married or just together with me id wouldn't care if she slept around. I know iam getting older and not the youngin I once was. if she wanted a young stud I wouldn't judge her for it, just waant her to be happy really. if she's happy just being with me so be it

    • or she's just together with me* bla can't type anymore

  • no I wouldn't cheat becuase I've been cheated on before and it hurts

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    • yeah can hurt bad, I wonder how the poeple that think it's OK to do would feel, I really do, some people see no problem in it, they accept it as normal and acceptable, perhaps in relationships where it's agreed, not where you know both of you want to be exclusive

  • I have never cheated nor can I see myself cheating.

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  • No. God gets mad, my wife would get mad and I'd have to start hating myself. And for what?

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    • So true..the 10 commandments, but God will forgive if we mess up..I ended up now with a Christan, is what God really wanted for me..xx

    • Whenever He bailed anyone out on earth He'd say "Go and sin no more". Not that He thought we could actually not sin anymore, it was more a case of insisting that we try! ; - )

  • I have cheated. In multiple relationships, but not all. and everytime it was due to my own insecurities and where myself esteem. Was as. At the time I would have given you all the excuses. About a bad relationship. And how. My girl wad shady. But I must be accountable for my actions and no one can make me cheat. Had I been a comfortable. Enough with myself I wouldn't of had to compensate by looking for sex outside of my relationships...the moral of the story for me is stop looking for fulfillment in a relationship, become fulfilled and love yourself. And then you can be ready to love someone else

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    • also I have come clean before and I have been caught before never has it gone unresolved in some form or another and the feelings are the same guilt, remorse, self-pity and shame despite how hard I tried to blame the girl(s) I had cheated on for driving me to it the fact is I could have just walked away but my ego told me my actions were justified my excuses rational and my behavior acceptable, time and experience have shown me you will feel better about yourself if you just do the right thing

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    • I'm 28. I was with my ex wife from 17-25 and we have a daughter together. We honestly probably should have. Broken up long before we did but guess it was scary considering. Its all we knew me and my current girl have been together for a couple years. Now almost and I cheated. On her in the very beginning and I told her about it we were on and off for a while bit we've been able to resolve our own issues. And move forward in a positive. And healthy way, its more then I could have asked for

    • i just figure it would be an easier conversation to have via pms... it is not something that can be answered in short form

  • I wouldn't want to get cheated on by a girl, so I feel like I shouldn't either.

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  • can we define "cheating"?

    I've never slept with or gone on any kind of dates or intimate/personal alone time with other girls behind my ex-gf's back.

    I HAVE however thought of cheating, at times kind of working the flirt/ask out angle on some girls behind my ex-gf's back.

    But I know if a girl said yes to date or if our talking/flirting became really serious, I'd fess up to my girlfriend. However, I don't think I'd ever be in that situation to cheat anymore. Any future S/O of mine will have my full, undivided affection and attention.

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    • i believe what you describe to be cheating. My personal definition is engaging in any activity with another man/woman that I would disapprove of my significant other doing

    • interesting definition, and I do like your answer as well.

      but re: your definition, what if someone is extra jealous or extra carefree? Wouldn't that then make your definition of cheating relative to the persons involved? A jealous girl may think her boyfriend going out with a female coworker to get drinks and watch a movie is cheating. A trusting, confident women may just see it as her boyfriend hanging out with a coworker friend.

    • If they are extra jealous. Then they have the issues that would lead to them being likely. To cheat those are there insecurities being projected. On you, also not healthy

  • I would never cheat. I am a very committed person and can be romantic at times.

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  • no no and no to all never and I never will

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  • No, when I'm committed, I stick to it.

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  • Never have, never would.

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  • i think if you do cheat and there's no trail of it getting back to your partner then don't tell them but if you have the nerve to cheat on your partner more then once then you should be in that relationship.

    if you did it once maybe it was on a drunken night out or you slept with the stripper at a bacholer or hen party or if on a work trip it happened in the heat of the moment then fair enough

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    • haha I doubt the woman in question would think any of those scenarios are "fair enough" or any man with a girl who did them to him either.

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    • im just sharing my view that's all, I don't want to be the enemy here

    • Yes, and I am greatful. You said you wouldn't want to know, hense ignorence is bliss.

      And hopefully will never happen to you.

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    • Interesting. Please elaborate?

  • Well, I have days where I just feel differently about things, emotionally numb etc, and such days where I'm over come with emotions of love, guilt over small things I can never change, not cheating or anything not being the best man I could for her, bringing her flowers writing love notes.

    I was in a position where I almost cheated on one of my numb days, but I knew that when one of those emotion filled days came around I wouldn't be able to live with myself, and that I would hurt my girlfriend and I couldn't do it. So I try live as a good man even on days where I feel numb to things and am prone to selfishness.

    I can be selfish at times, but she makes me want to be a better man, and I know cheating isn't right so Iv'e learned to think about how it would make her feel rather than how I would feel.

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  • I've never cheated and I know I will never cheat, but I have fantasized about having sexual relations with someone that I found extremely hot that wasn't my girlfriend. But if the opportunity came up, I know I would not have sex with the girl.

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    • Thank you for your honesty.

What Girls Said 26

  • I have never cheated on a boyfriend. I know I can't say for sure what will or will not happen in the future, but I cannot see myself ever cheating. I just can't stand cheaters so I would never want to be one.

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    • LIES!

    • fair

    • Flirting is a "form" of cheating..Just Looking at another, and maybe Thinking something, or finding someone attractive, by being "batting out baby blues," I might say..this is somewhat like being unfaithful..

  • I wouldn't and never will, goes against my moral and principles. I put myself in the other persons shoes...treat others the way you want to be treated...1 reply says it best " why cheat, when you can be single". I hope karma a bitch...If you don't want to be with the person. ..leave. ..A guy once ask me to hook up...we were friends. ..I was honest to him and my b/f...even when my relationship had prob. It never cross my mind to...I told him no o'course and those who do are mostly cowards

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    • I can understand people saying why cheat when you can be single. They have a point, why lie to or hurt people. You could not have a girlfriend and cuase far less heartache. If someone cheats on their girlfriend they can't love them. But then, someone else says if his girlfriend is happy, he doesn't mind them cheating or lying to him, as long as he can make them smile. That's something I never heard before...

    • Some people have "Open" relationships... I believe in honesty and communication

  • I´ve never cheated, don't want to but that doesn't necessarilly make me a better person. I just haven't been in a committed relationship long enough to actually cheat.

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    • I don't think the length of a relationship comes into it, if you have a boyfriend you could cheat on them within 2 weeks, a month ect. Although I see how maybe you are thinking it's more likely people cheat after being in a relastionship for a long time.

  • I've only cheated once. When my ex and I started dating he would flirt with all these other girls so I started flirting with a bunch of guys, told him about, he got mad and then stopped flirting. I didn't regret it because I got what I wanted. He was all hurt feelings and saw how I felt. We were able to move on from it and build a better relationship.

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    • Do you consider flirting, cheating? Or you cheated before. Yes sometimes it takes someone to empathise with a situation them selves to understand how it affects someone else.

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    • I also consider kissing cheating, like proper kissing, also exchanging sexy photos and sexy texts is not actually cheating but close to it!

    • Everyone has different views on what cheating is.

  • F*ck no, I'm a better human being than that.

    I hold myself to a higher standard as a woman.

    I've never cheated on a boyfriend.

    I have never even considered cheating on a boyfriend. If I ever feel like cheating, then I take it as a sign to reevaluate the relationship.

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  • Its funny when people ask this on a website. People still fee compelled to lie, and or Stand on a soap box gloating about how clean they are.

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    • why do you think they are lying? Are you a cheater or non cheater?

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    • I say with speculation only, but possibly a certain number of cheater types prefer to skip over the question, not wanting to bother their consciences with it, thus contaminating the data sample.

    • no actually i'm not. It's just the mass majority of people that cheat lie about it. I don't know why people lie. It doesn't make you a bad person. In many cases if not all the person that was cheated on REFUSES to acknowledge that they had a part in their partner cheating. RARELY if ever does a person cheat because they want to. It almost always has a cause.

  • I've never cheated before and the thought doesn't cross my mind.

    I sometimes picture in my head what would happen, if we were to break up and the only reason I can think of for that would be infidelity. Imagining hurting my partner like that literally makes me depressed. Brb, ////////////wrists

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  • When my boyfriend would cheat on me and treat me like dirt, I ended up meeting another guy.

    I didn't have sex with him. But, this guy did see I was vulnerable and did kiss me. Cheating is cheating so, I guess I have cheated. Once. Felt terrible about it. Though, it was one kiss. Nothing near as bad as him.

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  • hmmm... yes I've cheated before but that's after I found out he was having an online affair for 6 months. Cheating is cheating to me and yes I felt I had to level the playing field it didn't do any good and no I have no regrets I mean I enjoyed the one night stand I still think about it...miss it sometimes I could never tell him but I wouldn't do it again would rather end it. makes everything less complicated

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  • i've never cheated. Never say never because we can never say what will happen in twenty years but I don't plan on cheating, I don't want to be that kind of person.

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  • If he cheated on me, I'd cheat on him and make it plain as day not giving a shit lol. But if I were unhappy and want to break up in a relationship I'll just tell him that we need to break up.

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  • I'm one of the most loyal people you could ever meet. I wouldn't cheat on anyone because it would hurt me more than it would hurt the person I'm cheating on.

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  • have never, would never. Even thinking about it abstractly (with no person in mind) I feel physically ill thinking about the guilt and how much I would hurt my boyfriend. I wouldn't deserve to be forgiven and I would never be able to forgive myself. I love intensely with all my heart and would never do it. I get uncomfortable when people even flirt with me when I'm in a relationship. I drop the "my boyfriend" bomb early and often, just in case there's any confusion. I'm proud to be with him and I don't want anyone else.

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  • I've been cheated on, it's a shitty feeling. I would never do it. I don't think I could. I would not be able to live with the guilt. Esp knowing how it feels

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  • Yes, I have cheated on my ex boyfriend with my man who is now my hubby and we have been together for 12 years, and I have never cheated on my hubby. Although one time I went to a party with my girlfriend (she was a bad girl) and we aren't friends anymore but one of her guy friends grabbed me and kissed me but I pushed him away and he didn't try again. I told my hubby who was my boyfriend then and he was happy nothing went any further. But I don't really see that as cheating beause it was a kiss that happened unexpectedly and I stopped it immediately. I admit I have thought about cheating because I always wondered thaomit my hubby had the opportunity to cheat, he probably would so justifying my behavior if I ever did cheat would make me feel better about cheating. In the end, I know I would feel worse for cheating because I would had just jeapordized my morals and values as oppose to how my hubby would feel. Plus, karma is a bitch.

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  • I been with my guy for 10 years and I was very young, didn't get to really live my life. Had responsibilities at a young age, Getting treated like shit, suspicion of him fucking my sister, Angry at the lazy ass man he is, needed a little excitement, really liked the guy and he treated me great. He made me feel lie a woman unlike my boyfriend. Want to call it quits. Being unappreciated. Hate that he's not out going. I'm also younger than my boyfriend.

    No regrets. No outcome, it was more or less a fling but not to say some feelings weren't involved. things abruptly ended. Shits still a secret.

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    • why the hell are you still with your boyfriend?

    • I'm in the midst of ending it. There are some complications and I need to take neccesary precautions especially since there are children involved.

  • i can't tolerate cheats and I won't be one of them I won't cheat

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  • I wouldn't cheat on someone I think its wrong.

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  • No. It is against morality

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  • I have before when my it was clear that my partner did not care enough about me and our relationship to address core issues. This has been when the relationship was ending, the love was all but gone, and I'll be honest...they had it coming.

    I have no regrets. In fact, I feel like it freed me from my last little bit of attachment and gave me the boost to leave. Though no, I did not continue to see the person I slept with after the first time. I would also say that this wasn't something I would make a habit of. It's taught me instead to value myself and leave as soon as it is clear the relationship is unhappy or unhealthy. There are plenty of couples who have been together for ages (30, 40, 50 years) and they are miserable together. That isn't love. That's co-dependence.

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  • I have cheated once. I was like 16 and kissed someone else.

    I did come clean and tell my boyfriend.

    It didn't go farther then the one kiss.

    I have never cheated on anyone besides that, and wouldn't cheat on anyone again.

    No clue, I did feel like shit after.

    My boyfriend and I broke up after it, but then dated on and off the next 5 years.

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    • I see, that's good you were honest with him

    • Yea, I literally told him the day it happened because it made me sick to my stomach to think about

  • I would not cheat on someone, I think it's so wrong

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  • ITS A HABIT, I CHEAT AND I WILL CHEAT ALWAYS,ITS JUST AN ADDICTION,I CAN CHEAT MORE THAN 3 PERSONS AT A TIME!) I DID IT BECAUSE I LACK TRUST EXCEPT GOD...NO REGRETS,IF YOU PLAY A SAFE AND FAIR GAME,WHERE NOBODY IS HURT ED AT THE END...

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    • did you really just type God in that sentence? . . .

    • So you lack trust.. how does it make you feel that you are betraying other peoples trust?

      I'm not meaning that in a nasty way.. I mean has that crossed your mind that by cheating you are abusing someone elses trust, which is what you are worried about happening to you in the first place.

  • I have never cheated physically. In the beginning of my relationship with my boyfriend, I sexted this guy that I've never met before. I knew it was wrong so I stopped doing it, and have never done it again with anyone.

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    • I'm glad you decided to stop. Sometimes when people first start dating there is someone your already talking to. I don't think it's so bad if your not official yet. But after maybe 3 dates it's probably safe to say you like the person and should stop talking to the other. Thanks for your honesty.

  • No I have never cheated.

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  • Yes, I get bored

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    • fair play for your honesty

    • I think sometimes with me, it was more like being---vindictive.

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