How can I end a potentially dangerous relationship?

I've just started seeing this guy, we've been dating for a few weeks but he's starting to scare me. He's constantly asking me if I'm talking to other guys, he gets really jealous when he sees a guy glance my way, when we are not together he is always asking me what I'm doing a who I'm with. I'm not paranoid but I'm pretty sure I've seen him drive by my house a few times. Just recently he told me he loved me, and like I said we have not been together long, and he got pissed off when I didn't say it back.

Anyway, how do I end this gently? I don't want him to get angry, if he is already acting this way, I'm afraid of how he might take it.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Step 1: Adopt the mentality of 'Who the hell does he think he is?" This does wanders for a woman's self-esteem and ability to make respectable decisions.

    You need to GENUINELY BELIEVE that this guy is totally out of line and inappropriate (which he is). Believe it, think it, and feel it so much that you can't bare to waste anymore of your precious, divine energy on someone who lacks so much respect. Yes, he could be unstable...which is why you are going to be smart and remove him from your life before he brings you chaos and drama. Don't be afraid of him.

    Step 2: Lie to him about going through a lot and not being ready to be in a relationship.

    Normally, I'd say, be totally honest and upfront, but chances are if he's a psycho and you say "Look dude, you are being very abnormal and all of this possessive behavior has turned me off of you as a love interest", he's going to throw a hissy fit and might start stalking you. So it's best to just assertively tell him, "This isn't going to work out. I have so much going on in my life emotionally that I need to fix. The last thing I need to do is be in a relationship." TELL HIM, DON'T ASK HIM.

    Does he know where you live?

    • Thank you, that's a very good idea. I think that's what I'll do. Yes, he knows where I live.

    • No problem! Okay so yeah, if he's as unstable if you make him out to be and he knows where you live, it's best to end things on good terms.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Have a friend stay with you for a couple days just encase and end it over the phone.

    • I think a phone call would make him mad, but I like the friend idea.

    • To be honest, if he's anything like you've been describing him, he's going to get mad regardless. Sounds like no matter how you do it he's going to assume there's another guy. I think it's best to piss him off over the phone rather then in person.

What Girls Said 1

  • Sometimes, you just have to do what you have to do. If I was you, I'd bring a friend that is bigger than him just to be nearby if anything happens. If you are legitimately concerned, bring an officer. I've been in the situation more than once (yes, I know, I was dumb enough to choose the same type twice), and the time that I didn't bring an officer I wish I had. Better to be safe than to be sorry. People might make fun of you for needing a cop to break up with your man, but they sure wouldn't be laughing if anything happened to you.

    • Yeah, I'll definitely bring someone with me. I agree that it's better to be safe. Thank you

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