What are you thoughts? Girls: what would you do?

Me and my girl broke up about a month ago. Pretty much our timing was off as I had to move home because I finished college and she still has a year left and she had gotten out of a long term relationship prior to us getting together. Neither of us thought it would turn into anything at first but it really did. We clicked with each other and held a special connection. She said she was falling for me and saw us having a future together and wanted to be serious at some point.

I believe that when I moved home (3 hours) she felt like she was being forced to commit to being very serious when she wasn't ready to and therefore kind of pushed away. She said she really wants to talk at some point and talk about "us" after we give each other time and space. She has never done that before with anyone, normally she would be done with it but she said it was "different" for me. She is very straight forward about these things and wouldn't say it if she didn't mean it.

Currently she is hanging out with some guy, but I'm pretty sure its just a "fun" and "convenience" thing as the semester is only 6 more weeks long. She also only gave me back one of my pieces of clothing that she had (returned through a friend).

I feel like things changed all of a sudden and she was battling herself with what she wanted right now which is why this happened. The first month of me being home things were great and I saw her a few times. I feel like since she said she saw us having a future together she knew that it would be really serious and just wasn't ready to commit to that coming out of a long term relationship and that she wants to do her thing and not be tied down for a while before committing to that. She told me she was finally okay with being on her own and such.

What do you think? And girls if you were her what would you do in a situation like this? Prolly the same thing? How long do you think before she will contact me? We will only be 25 minutes from each other this summer.

Updates:
Oh I also forgot to mention that I did fall in love with her. I have had many relationships over the years but nothing touched this. Her being "the one" actually crossed my mind a few times

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Most Helpful Girls

  • When was the last time you heard from her?/that she contacted you?

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  • I think that your theory is definitely the case. Many times, when people have had long relationships or ones that ended badly, when they finally meet someone who probably is the right person for them, they freak out. They can freak out because they're scared to commit, scared to get hurt, or they just want to explore their options a bit before they are ready to settle down. It's very common, no matter how much it sucks for the other person. I feel like people don't really understand situations like these until they are at one of the ends of them. I have been with guys like this, and I, myself, have felt like this. It isn't easy to be at either end. I don't know her or her situation, so it's hard to say how long it will take her to contact you. When she is ready, she will contact you, or, perhaps some sort of fate will bring you back together :)

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    • Thanks! Its much easier to talk to someone who really understands it from personal experience. She said "I don't wanna do this, but I feel like right now I need to" when talking about breaking up. She is worth waiting for but it just plain sucks and hurts. We had been planning so much for this upcoming summer and she was really excited. I know she's doing her own thing and talking to this other guy know but with everything I've said without every tiny detail (cuz that could take forever) do you think I still cross her mind? Also I was never very good about talking to her about my feelings and I know that was hard for her but I was getting better at it and she was happy that I was. I was getting ready to tell her that I fell in love her when we broke up so obviously I didn't. About 2 weeks later I had to get it off my chest. I called her and told her. She was very much caught off guard but she said she was glad I told her. Her best friend told me that it meant so much. Is that good too?

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    • You probably do cross her mind still and if her friend says it meant a lot to her that you told her you loved her, then that's definitely a good thing. She probably was very happy that you still thought about her. You can message me on here, no problem. Shelb5113 is my username

    • It says I can only message you if you follow me back. I just followed you. starguy91. Thanks :)

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