Did i cheat, should i tell? should i just move on?

My girlfriend and i broke up 2 weeks ago after a 5 year relationship, things had been bad for quiet sometime to the extent that their was no intimacy or kissing or touching , we were almost like 2 people that just knew each other, when we broke up i was extremely hurt , i was heartbroken , angry , confused , she told me it was it we're finished don't ever try make contact or anything, the following night i went out to the club with a friend , we got really wasted on beer and shots , as the night went on this lady showed interest in me , we got chatting and next i knew she kissed me but i pulled away , then outside the club we talked and kissed again , it was just a kiss , i went home alone feeling horrible with myself , the next day my (ex) girlfriend contacted me to see if we can try work things out , i feel absolutely terrible about what i have done , what should i do? did i cheat? it was just a kiss? should i tell her? i know if i do it will be the end of us for sure , i'm heartbroken ,

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Most Helpful Guy

  • She ended things with you and said it was over for good. It was only a kiss anyway. Just because she contacted you the next day means nothing. You did nothing wrong. There's no need to even mention it. Your guilt is probably more based on the fact that you're still hurt from the breakup. You did absolutely nothing wrong, it's only cheating, if you're in a relationship. Cut yourself some slack.

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What Girls Said 6

  • This really reminded me of that whole "We were on a break" thing with Ross and Rachel on Friends. =D

    I think that since you've broken up 2 weeks ago (and make sure she understands the sense of the words as breaking up, not, like, taking space for each other or something), that you didn't cheat.

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  • You didn't cheat. You weren't together, you could've slept with the girl it wouldn't be cheating.

    Now, if you want to try again with your ex, you should tell her. It's not like you jumped on the girl to kiss her.

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  • You weren't cheating. She kissed YOU not the other way around - also you guys were broken up at that point. It's up to you whether or not you want to tell her.

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  • No it's not cheating since you weren't together.

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  • You did not cheat, as you were single at the time of the kiss. Should you tell her? Ultimately, it doesn't matter, because the relationship will not last anyway. You may talk, and things may get better for awhile, but it will most certainly take a turn for the worse, and all of the old problems will resurface. The whole, break up, get back together thing doesn't work so well. She got a hold of you because she's hurting too, but that doesn't mean you guys can just shake off all the issues you had and start fresh, you're still the same unfunctional couple.

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  • No you didn't cheat. You weren't together anymore when you kissed that girl. To be honest I wouldn't get back with her. Sounds like there's no chemistry between the two of you.

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    • I have to agree with this. As you said things were bad for quite some time. You may not be over the relationship, but it doesn't mean you have to jump back into it.

    • Yup.
      QA, if it has been bad for a while and it seems like it can't be fixed, trying to get back together won't lead you anywhere. Like that other anon girl said, you're still the same dysfunctional couple. She's most likely just missing being in a relationship (she's lonely) and that's why she contacted you again. It won't work. She wants to get back for the wrong reasons, and you're already heartbroken over this. Jumping back into a relationship will only prolong your heartbreak, since you will break up anyway sooner or later.

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