Need advice on how to break up with a sweet guy?

I met a guy from an online dating site and the first time I met him, I felt like I was really into him. We've gone on a few dates since then, and already I'm realizing that my guard is up and I'm placing distance between us.

He's a perfectly nice guy. A total gentleman, and that's refreshing in this age where I feel like men have forgotten how to treat women. However, I feel like I'm settling in some senses. Like we don't share the same views on certain key things, like religion and politics. Initially, I didn't think this was going to bother me, because otherwise he's a great guy, but it does. A lot more than I expected it to.

I don't want to lead him on. I know he's really into me though (a lot more than I am into him) and I would like to end the relationship as cleanly as possible. It's only been less than a month, but my gut feeling is telling me this isn't the right person. I've ignored that feeling before with someone else, and ended up wishing I hadn't, and I'd like to not make that same mistake twice.

Could anyone give me some advice on this? Again, he's not a bad guy or anything. I'm just not feeling any click.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Simple, be honest. Tell him, "I've really enjoyed getting to know you and I think you're a great guy, but at this time I'd like to continue meeting and dating other people, I think we have some differences that would keep us from being a successful happy couple, good luck to you, take care!" Boom, done. Nice, honest, and outta here.

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    THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE

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What Guys Said 2

  • Best advice is to just tell him the truth as plainly as you just did above. I'd rather hear that than excuses, but maybe that's just me.

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  • religion and politics is no reason to break up with someone, perhaps you just dont care about guys since your " not feeling any click", if you get another guy you'll just end up doing the same thing, so why did you end up being with him in the first place?

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    • Um, religion is not a big deal? Religion his a huge core belief for many people and having drastically different views in this department could very certainly break a relationship. How would you raise your children? Would one of you convert? What about a wedding? It's like wanting to live in town or in the country, stay where you were raised or move across the country, have kids or not? All big life decisions, and if yours differ fromthe other halfs, then someone isn't getting what they want out of life. Everyone needs to compromise, but some things just can't be compromised.

What Girls Said 4

  • If you're not feeling the chemistry and not "clicking up your heels" with him, then simply be honest with him. Tell him you would just like to be friends, and that it is only fair to tell him.
    I wouldn't say to ignore him, but being you both have gone out and He does like you like you say he does, it's only right, so You don't feel you're "leading him on" to set him straight right from the beginning.
    Good luck. xx

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  • You just talk to him over the phone or in person and say that you think he's sweet and all but that you would like to find someone who shares the same religious views as you. The thing though is you have to keep it short and sweet but honest

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  • Just be straight with him, but also polite and sensitive. You have some irreconcilable differences that make it difficult for you to see yourself with him in the future.

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  • Okay here's what I would say Your really sweet and all but this isn't working out I am really busy with work I'm sorry but we need to break up

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