Why did she push me away and end things?

So I was dating this girl for about 4 months. Things were great in all aspects of our relationship and we had a special connection that you don't just come by. We had gotten very close and were starting to talk about the future.

I moved home from college and she was still there. Things were still great until on day she said she "wasn't missing me like she should be, and was okay with being on her own". So I gave her some space to think about things like she wanted. We then talked and broke up. She said that we didn't grow apart and she didn't want to break up but felt that she needed to and that I'm the only person that she would actually be open to giving a second go round with (normally she is one and done). The time that we were together was fantastic but she was having a tough time being "ready" for something serious which is where we were headed but I never pressured her into anything thing and said we can take our time.

She had gotten out of a long term relationship a little bit before we got together and neither one of us thought it would turn into anything but it did, it turned into something special.

Why did she do this when she was talking about the future and telling me it was the best she has ever been treated etc etc? Maybe because she thought it wouldn't turn into anything and it did but she's not ready for that serious of a relationship (she has a year of college left)? Or maybe when I moved home she felt like she was being forced into it being "serious"? Or maybe she got scared that she found what she was looking for in a relationship for when she wants to be with someone forever?

Its been almost 2 months now and she is seeing someone else now but it isn't serious. It's almost like she's dating around and seeing what else is out there before committing to something as serious as us?

Or is she pretty much not ready to "settle down" at this point?


Most Helpful Guy

  • This woman is definitely not someone to invest in. 120 days is not a long time and while you may feel that the connection was "legendary" I assure you that such bonds do not break under such weak pressure. The fact that she is more than willing to move from person to person suggests either an issue in willingness to commit or a total disinterest in committing in general. The specific phrase suggesting that you'd be given a "second chance" seems slightly backwards don't you think? Wouldn't it be you giving her that chance? She is too into herself, believing far too much in her autonomy, and honestly whatever would unfold would be rough if it worked out at all even if she moved beyond the pettiness and fear of true depth and engagement with another person.


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What Girls Said 2

  • She's scared of getting hurt, so she runs

  • I agree with Anon guy. Whether she's confused or just isn't as interested as she was before, I wouldn't waste your time waiting for a "second chance." Even if she does come back, who's to say she won't leave again?


What Guys Said 1

  • I tell you what happend... While you were dating she was talking to other guys, the fact that " she didn't miss u like she should" is because other guys/her were getting to know one another while she's at school developing feeling for one another and your wherever u needed to be... Don't be suprised that she broke up with you and is dating someone else its because she wanted to see where that relationship would go... this is just a big sign of the universe saying move on bro you got played... I like how u try to convince yourself that she will comeback around cuz she doesn't normally do that "she's a one and done" lol does it sound a little different now that I'm mocking it hahaha