What shall I do when his ex suddenly re-appears back in his life?

So I really like my guy friend and we've been seeing each other - we've both told each other we like each other. But he said that he's scared of getting hurt so he's not sure whether he wants another relationship as he has trust issues. His ex cheated on him with his best friend, this happened 5 years ago and he hasn't gotten over it. I decided to give him some space to try and figure things out, But during this time it seems that his ex (out of nowhere) has started contacting him. What can I do? This is making me feel very insecure, I want things to go back to the way they were a couple of weeks ago - we were both very happy and things were looking up - but now I'm not so sure. Please help, any feedback is much appreciated.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • At this point and time, when an Ex appears out of "nowhere," this spells toil and trouble in a relationship that you are trying to be in with a "new guy friend." He hasn't gotten over what she did to him 5 years ago, so this makes him vulnerable in every which way. And more than likely when he sees her, it stirs up some old feelings that he may or may not still had inside. Now he is flat out---confused. Yes, you have every right to feel "insecure."
    Continue to give him some space and time to try and get his head together. But you might want to contact him, from time to time, to let him know you are Still here for him. Feel the situation out. But don't allow yourself to be played as a fool. This ghost from the past may be here to Stir up a bit of a brew herself, and being she knows him better than you do, knows all the tricks of the trade on how to do it. xx

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What Guys Said 3

  • do things he likes don't push him into a relationship if he has unfinished business with his ex... but give him friendly gestures and space every once in a while..

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  • I dont think this is the time to be taking time and space away from each other if this girl is trying to retaliate her way into his life

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  • Isn't a girlfriend just a best friend with benefits? He clearly is making a mistake talking to her at all and you should tell him he will only get hurt doing so, be confident and go for it

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What Girls Said 1

  • Tell him your concerns

    You guys need to be able to tallk About this

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