To start, my ex-girlfriend and I began dating last March, after we had been friends for months previous. Literally everything was wonderful (no arguments, hung out all the time) up until January of this year when she began to become distant. I began finding out she was talking to her ex (who was mentally abusive) and told him that I was "Clingy As Fuck." This should have been my first red flag but I forgave her because I truly loved her. Then I began to hear that she was flirting A TON with one of the guys she works with and when I confronted her she replied with, "I have a crush on him but I would never act on it." Again, stupid me decided to forgive her and move past it. Weeks after this conversation I went to her house with every intention of breaking up with her when she flat out told me, "I love you and I want to make this work so badly." This stopped me dead in my tracks and I decided not to cut ties with her. Two days later, she came to my house, broke up with me and told me, "She wasn't happy with her life and that she needed space to breathe." I went into a state of depression because I loved this girl with all of my heart and gave her the world. My uncle was diagnosed with Stage 2 Cancer, my aunt with breast cancer and my god-father passed away, yet she felt the need to crush all that I was by cutting ties. I found out through a mutual friend 2 weeks later that she was already in bed with the kid from work she told me she was only friends with. I learned that she also had to purchase Plan B, and that she was going around bashing me at work. I'm honestly just so confused on what happened and it's eating me up from the inside. She initially told me she wanted to stay friends, but now has completely stopped answering me. Does anyone have any sort of idea to what happened to this "fairytail" relationship? Any insight would be highly appreciated.
Most Helpful Girl
You are codependent! I am too, and it is very hard to realize when you are under the influence of another person you desire.
Book: Co-Dependent No More by Melody Beattie... great read
She is the type of shady selfish chick who loves attention and control, and she will always pursue any person who grants her those liberties. Most partners WON"T PUT UP WITH CRAP LIKE THIS. You have proven to be an accepting forgiving partner and she does not respect you because you have not given her any boundaries that she must respect to earn your love, it's whatever she says, goes.
This is a very important relationship that gives you a chance to chose from now on if you want to be treated with respect in the future by women you date, or if you are going to pursue more of the same... Don't take it lightly, you have a choice!
If any person ever ever does the type of thing she has done, talk aroung you in circles when caught, lying, badmouthing you, please recognize the patterns and put your foot down and leave them. It is the only way you will achieve a happy long term relationship and improve your self esteem. Don't let people mess with your heart any more.0