Do I have the right to be upset at her?

I love this girl to death and I want to get back together with her but I found out she got a college acceptance letter to Seattle and Massachusetts and wants to go. I don't want her to go because I was planning on getting back together with her soon. She also is the mother of our son who is a month old. I feel like she has no right to move away and if she does I should be going with her. I've been talking to her a couple of times and she said she has a better opportunity over there and she has relatives to take care of Jason (our son) while she is in school. And she doesn't want me around him because I'm a bad influence. This is what she told me "I don't want my son to be raised by a cheater and a liar." I did cheat on her maybe twice in our relationship togerher but overall I still want her back. She has no right to move away from those who love her the most.


Most Helpful Girl

  • You should be happy that she got accepted to this college.

    However you have every right to be bothered by her decision without consulting you. I mean he's your child too.

    The question is, and look deep inside yourself before answering it, will you actually be a bad influence on him? Or are/will you be a responsible parent? Or a dead beat?

    Because if you're not a good one honestly it's better just to not be around him at all.

    Once youve decided this try to compromise with her about you being in his life. How you are also his parent. How she might have carried him and gave birth to him but you also played an important role for him to even exist! How you are apart of him.

    Hopefully you two will come to an agreement but if not you know there's always court. But even then unless you get/want custody of him it's going to be hard for you to be in his life in his early stages/years because you can't just fly a baby back and fourth and I'm sure you have your own life not to mention traveling is expensive!

    But I am really glad that you are trying to be apart of your childs lfe and trying to be a family by getting back together. I mean for peat sake you were willing to move with her!

    So good luck to you and hopefully everything will work out for the best =)

    • Oh you cheated... Okay now I see.

      Let's get one thing straight she loved you and you f*cked another girl not to mention continued to sext her.

      She has every right to be angry at you... But he is still your child and if you are the good guy that you claim you are you and your child both deserve to be around each other.

      So at the most you can try to apologize to her and try to win her heart and your son back. But it's unlikely maybe you'll compromise something with your son but that's about it.

      Like I said take her to court he's your son too

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 8

  • No, you have no right to be upset. Yes she's taking your son away from you but from the way it sounds, if you cared about her and your son you wouldn't have cheated on her or lied to her. Love isn't about the sexual connection or child connections you have. If she stayed there just to get back with you it will completely destroy her if you put one toe out of line. She can't trust you and is afraid that if she lets you influence her son then he will end up hurting a young girl the way you hurt her and she will not let that happen. And if that means taking him away from you then that's what she will do.

  • Uh, love, you CHEATED on her multiple times.

    What makes you think she would ever want to be with you? She told you she doesn't want you around and for good reasons too.

    You sound extremely selfish. Not only did you break her trust, but now that she has education and possible career opportunities, you think you can just waltz back into her life and make her stay?

    If you truly loved her, you wouldn't have cheated. Leave her alone and make yourself a better person elsewhere.

    If you feel like her moving away with your son is unfair, you should have thought about the consequences of fucking around behind her back. Too far to see him? Tough shit, not her fault you couldn't keep it in your pants. She doesn't have to stay for you.
    If you want to see your son, come visit. But don't expect a warm welcome after what you've done.

    • I found out she was pregnant 5 months after we broke up. She was the selfish one FIRST because she did not tell me and I had to find out through friends.

    • Show All
    • Never said it did. But I ended it because I knew it was wrong. I have self control. I'm not a bad person.

    • Lawl, if you had self control, you wouldn't have fucked another girl.

      I smell troll.

  • If you cheated on her you obviously don't love her. She has every right to do whatever the heck she wants. I wouldn't want to get back with a man who cheated on me - even if he's the father of my son. Sorry.

  • she needs to take advantage of every opportunity afforded to her. ur being selfish by trying to hold her back

    you had ur chance with her and u ruined it by cheating. she's experienced u and u weren't good enough. she shouldn't downgrade her life for u

    it doesn't sound like ur doing too much besides dicking round so if u wanna see ur son then you move where he is?

  • I think you should be happy for her. since you have a baby with her you might want to mention that the distance will keep you from seeing your child and that is unfair to the child and you. mention the child first and then yourself. in that order so she doesn't think you are only thinking of your self. if you are a bad influence get your self together for the son and show her you have changed.

  • You cheated on her and she is finally getting her life back on track ,

    Sounds like you'll be doing the chasing and explaining a lot if you love this woman. Cheating is a horrible thing and no one deserves that.

  • you have not been reliable. She expected you to be there for her, and only for her. you broke that trust.
    now, she wants to move on with her life, rebuild. i don't blame her for that. you imply that you are one of those who love her the best, if u did, why would you cheat on her? by your own admission, more than once?
    quite frankly, I dont think you have a right to be upset with her.

    about your son though, thats for the two of you to sort out

  • She had every right! This is America!
    Rights for woman! It sound like she's bitter. well, ifs she's as stubborn as I am you'll never see her again or Jason.
    Better say good bye now, Anonymous.


What Guys Said 1

  • You sound extremely selfish man, you can't hold a girl back from going to college to better herself because you were planning on getting back together with her. Yes, you have a child and all but you still can't just think she's going to hang around and wait for you. Plus, it doesn't sound like she is interested in taking you back either.

    • How am I being selfish? I love this girl and my friends tell me she still wants me back.

    • "This is what she told me "I don't want my son to be raised by a cheater and a liar." I did cheat on her maybe twice in our relationship togerher but overall I still want her back."

      Nothing there says anywhere she wants you back, and of course you're being selfish that you wouldn't want the girl that you "love" to go places that give her opportunities to better herself and her life, for the future of her and your child.