Does he actually hate me? or is he just hurt?

I was best friends with a guy for 1 and a half years, we told each other everything and lived together with a bunch of other people. I always felt a connection with him and I know that he felt the same thing but we didn't do anything about it. One day we were both drunk and ended up having sex. We both said we wouldn't tell anyone, but kept doing it. He hooks up with a lot of girls but has never had a gf and I think i was the closest that he has ever come to having one. He acts like a bit of a dick, but when we were alone he was the sweetest guy in the world and very gentle and it seemed like whatever mask he was wearing came off.
I ended us hooking up because I felt like it was leading down a bad path as it was a total secret and I knew if it continued i would fall for him. When i ended it suddenly he was angry, treated me like dirt and we started getting into huge fights ( yelling, name calling, you name it). One day i got so angry i told the other roommates that we had been hooking up. He told me he would never speak to me again and we got in other huge fights. I ended up leaving without telling anyone and moving out of the house.
After we didn't speak for months he messaged me apologizing. I accepted however i was still very upset that he treated me the way he did. When i got back into town, i went to his house and apologized for telling people. Ever since ( its been about a year) we haven't really seen each other too much, but when i see him he is either extremely nice to me, or extremely rude. I am not sure if he actually "hates me" like he has said he does or if he is having trouble coping or if he doesn't know what to do with me. I need advice because I truly care about him, I know he has some emotional problems but I miss him both as my friend and I suppose as my lover. Any advice is appreciated!


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What Guys Said 1

  • he is probably feeling some rejection and that can make people do weird things


What Girls Said 1

  • I don't think he hates you cause most guys, even girls, would never contact the person they hate. I do believe something is troubling him though and that's the reason he became angry. I am in the same predicament sort of and now he is back in my life after a year. Time will tell all. Keep on caring for him if you truly feel he's the person you care deeply about.


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