1. Gouge his eyes out. That way he want know what color you are.
2. You'll need to do the same to any other KKK members he knows, or anyone who might tell him you're not white.
3. Get a labotomy. That will make conversation flow more naturally.
4. Read Don Quixote.
5. Actually, you'll need to do 4 before 3...
6. The bill. If you go to an ethnic restaurant he'll want to burn it down instead of paying.
7. If you go to an 'american' restaurant, he'll let you burn it down.
8. Don't let on that you know how to use a toaster, that's too much learning for a woman.
9. If you get married you garments can be matching.
10. Obviously don't...
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