I don't believe in leagues whatsoever, but I do fully believe in your second point. There's lots of people in the world (men and women alike) who go after people they're attracted to, even if they're not compatible. And then they wonder why they get shot down.
The flip side to this though is I get suspicious or even outright hostile looks from girls sometimes when I do something nice for them without them asking as if they think I now am going to demand something from them when I was just trying to be nice.
I do have an issue with "Maybe I'm not smart/fun/interesting enough for them. Maybe I should have worked on my appearance more."
People shouldn't feel this way in my opinion. Just mentally brush the whole thing off and say "I'm not their type or they don't want a relationship" and the appearance thing. Eh. As long as someone isn't a slob, they shouldn't have to change. People should be with people who like them not find them hot all the time.
I love this a nice guy is a guy who thinks by being nice the world should fall in his lap because he a fucking martyr. A good guy/men does it because it's the right thing and although being appreciate is nice it should be a given that being a good person is a norm not a sacrifice
I try and be the nicest that I can; There have been too many experiences with people's perceptions of my words that I'm never certain on whether or not I'm coming off as nice to whomever I'm speaking to at any given moment. Perhaps this is just a social-readability defecit on my part...
I dated a guy who claimed to be nice, and he was just an asshole in disguise. He was always complaining about everything and that no one wanted him. and why no one wnat to sleep with him.
Ironically, people says I'm nice, i think it's because I'm a kind person and sweet, and I really don't recognize myself in any of this. I don't compare myself with others or complain like the guy I used to date.
Nice guy, aka "The guy that I'm never going to fuck". Nice guys are in fact just ugly guys who try to compensate their ugliness with stupid shit that never worked. Girls hate them. Obviously they don't hate them due being nice (that doesn't make sense anyways), but simply cus they're some unattractive, usually short, nerdy looking and feminine fucks. Still, no woman will ever say they hate them due looks, but they always find a positive behaviour thing on him and turn it into negative.
Regardless of what was said, I though this take was very well written and organized.
It seems like you spent a lot of time and mental energy carefully stitching small and large scale structure together, and it was just a pleasure to read.
considering this is the most discussed topic here, no offense, a lot of guys here probably need to grow a pair and a lot of girls need to stop being so shallow, i am talking about the scenario in this site. In the real world, there are a lot of factors when it comes to relationships and one night stands, FWB's etc are purely based on physical attraction. Get over it
Nah. Leagues don't exist. Where's your ID Card that you are 9/10 and I'm 6/10? And if someone is boring, ignorant or abusive, it's obvious that no one will like him/her
Well, I never claimed to be nice, everyone I know started calling me "too nice" because I'm always polite, kind, too shy, and compliant. On the other hand, I never blamed girls for my problem, I realise that I'm ugly, I have no self-confidence, and that's why I'm still a virgin (39) :(
Used to be like that. Decided to stop this shit and just be a 24/7 asshole. It doesn't help me with others, but at least I can be myself and don't have to put effort into seeming nice. However, I have to say, it pisses me off that the term nice is now trashed on the internet for whatever reason.
I used to call myself a "nice guy." When I started realizing that I was at fault for what happened in past relationships and dealing with the few times I was rejected, I've kinda backed out of the whole relationship scene.
I'm too afraid to talk or even gesture to women I find attractive anymore. I've been hurt too much to try again.
Decent take but whenever a girl brings up point #3 it grinds my gears. If being a decent human being is what you're SUPPOSED to do, why do you even consider getting with guys that aren't decent?
Nice take. It's always funny to see the unattractive "nice" guy complaining that the really attractive/hot girls, don't like "nice" guys but you don't see him approaching any less attractive women lol
"It may be a long and tough road, but it'll be worth it in the end, when you'll find someone the new, better "you" deserves."
Except the new "me" is not me anymore :( Just wanted to point that out.
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Anonymous
(45 Plus)
+1 y
Good take, I think you are righter for the most parts anyway.
Leagues exist as a concept of how people feel they can get and deserve, but it's obviously not an actually leagues. The rating in the leagues system is very individual as well, looks matters but people prefer different looks, most aspect are in the ayes of the beholder, so you and I won't rate people the same nor put them in the same league.
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Opinion Owner
+1 y
It funny what @Scrambledagain said, he have read a book and now thinks he get's it, while he obviously don't.
Bad boy do get laid more of course that part is true, but it's not the bad part the does it's all the good parts they do that does it that bad part is what make them only laid and not married part.
You can fool all girls some of the time, some girls all of the time, but not all girls all of the time - good or bad will show, and most girls will react to bad behaviour.
Well I'm a nice guy but I dont feel like girls owe me anything I dont get friendzoned jjust flat out ignored. I know my looks are bad and I dont care for hot girls too much but shit happens you gotta deal with it and move on I guess
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I don't believe in leagues whatsoever, but I do fully believe in your second point. There's lots of people in the world (men and women alike) who go after people they're attracted to, even if they're not compatible. And then they wonder why they get shot down.
The flip side to this though is I get suspicious or even outright hostile looks from girls sometimes when I do something nice for them without them asking as if they think I now am going to demand something from them when I was just trying to be nice.
Great MyTake
I do have an issue with "Maybe I'm not smart/fun/interesting enough for them. Maybe I should have worked on my appearance more."
People shouldn't feel this way in my opinion. Just mentally brush the whole thing off and say "I'm not their type or they don't want a relationship" and the appearance thing. Eh. As long as someone isn't a slob, they shouldn't have to change. People should be with people who like them not find them hot all the time.
I love this a nice guy is a guy who thinks by being nice the world should fall in his lap because he a fucking martyr. A good guy/men does it because it's the right thing and although being appreciate is nice it should be a given that being a good person is a norm not a sacrifice
I try and be the nicest that I can; There have been too many experiences with people's perceptions of my words that I'm never certain on whether or not I'm coming off as nice to whomever I'm speaking to at any given moment. Perhaps this is just a social-readability defecit on my part...
I dated a guy who claimed to be nice, and he was just an asshole in disguise. He was always complaining about everything and that no one wanted him. and why no one wnat to sleep with him.
Ironically, people says I'm nice, i think it's because I'm a kind person and sweet, and I really don't recognize myself in any of this. I don't compare myself with others or complain like the guy I used to date.
Nice guy, aka "The guy that I'm never going to fuck". Nice guys are in fact just ugly guys who try to compensate their ugliness with stupid shit that never worked. Girls hate them. Obviously they don't hate them due being nice (that doesn't make sense anyways), but simply cus they're some unattractive, usually short, nerdy looking and feminine fucks. Still, no woman will ever say they hate them due looks, but they always find a positive behaviour thing on him and turn it into negative.
Regardless of what was said, I though this take was very well written and organized.
It seems like you spent a lot of time and mental energy carefully stitching small and large scale structure together, and it was just a pleasure to read.
considering this is the most discussed topic here, no offense, a lot of guys here probably need to grow a pair and a lot of girls need to stop being so shallow, i am talking about the scenario in this site. In the real world, there are a lot of factors when it comes to relationships and one night stands, FWB's etc are purely based on physical attraction. Get over it
"1. They go for people way out of their league and get pissed when they're not willing to "settle"
There are no "leagues", unless you're an extremely shallow and probably unlikeable person. Just date whoever you're attracted to.
Someone mature, nice!
Nah. Leagues don't exist. Where's your ID Card that you are 9/10 and I'm 6/10?
And if someone is boring, ignorant or abusive, it's obvious that no one will like him/her
Unless he's a 10. Then girls will still like him.
@zagor if a guy has bad personality and he's not even superlatively handsome (AKA 10), how'd girls like him (instead of others)?
Huh? That's what I'm saying, that they'll still like him IF he is superlatively handsome, despite the issues.
@zagor well, he has a quality then, no denying.
Give this guy a bag of cookies!
@Unit1 thanks fella
i give you a thumbs up and batman agrees!
screencrush.com/442/files/2013/03/thumbs-up.jpg
Well, I never claimed to be nice, everyone I know started calling me "too nice" because I'm always polite, kind, too shy, and compliant.
On the other hand, I never blamed girls for my problem, I realise that I'm ugly, I have no self-confidence, and that's why I'm still a virgin (39) :(
What are you doing with yourself to make yourself more attractive?
I work out in the gym.
Used to be like that.
Decided to stop this shit and just be a 24/7 asshole. It doesn't help me with others,
but at least I can be myself and don't have to put effort into seeming nice.
However, I have to say, it pisses me off that the term nice is now trashed on the internet for whatever reason.
"However, I have to say, it pisses me off that the term nice is now trashed on the internet for whatever reason.
Brave New World, my friend. That's just the way young people are these days.
I used to call myself a "nice guy." When I started realizing that I was at fault for what happened in past relationships and dealing with the few times I was rejected, I've kinda backed out of the whole relationship scene.
I'm too afraid to talk or even gesture to women I find attractive anymore. I've been hurt too much to try again.
Decent take but whenever a girl brings up point #3 it grinds my gears. If being a decent human being is what you're SUPPOSED to do, why do you even consider getting with guys that aren't decent?
Nice take. It's always funny to see the unattractive "nice" guy complaining that the really attractive/hot girls, don't like "nice" guys but you don't see him approaching any less attractive women lol
I'm nice and I know it :)
"It may be a long and tough road, but it'll be worth it in the end, when you'll find someone the new, better "you" deserves."
Except the new "me" is not me anymore :(
Just wanted to point that out.
Good take, I think you are righter for the most parts anyway.
Leagues exist as a concept of how people feel they can get and deserve, but it's obviously not an actually leagues. The rating in the leagues system is very individual as well, looks matters but people prefer different looks, most aspect are in the ayes of the beholder, so you and I won't rate people the same nor put them in the same league.
It funny what @Scrambledagain said, he have read a book and now thinks he get's it, while he obviously don't.
Bad boy do get laid more of course that part is true, but it's not the bad part the does it's all the good parts they do that does it that bad part is what make them only laid and not married part.
You can fool all girls some of the time, some girls all of the time, but not all girls all of the time - good or bad will show, and most girls will react to bad behaviour.
Well I'm a nice guy but I dont feel like girls owe me anything I dont get friendzoned jjust flat out ignored. I know my looks are bad and I dont care for hot girls too much but shit happens you gotta deal with it and move on I guess