Hmmm let me think my girlfriend is amazing, I'm a good looking guy and I attract cute girls here and there. Do I feel heavy attractionv towards one or two of them every s and so? fuck yeah, Do I Stare at their booties thinking of how it would feel? guilty as fuck.
Now while I might feel this cripling attraction to some ladies I have met during the years with my lady. I have only kept it i my head, never cheated cause cheating is a choice. It's never a "moment of weakness" and I'm a guy. while I'm not gonna give you shit for doing it I advice to you that you dont rationalize on it, dont dwell either but dont talk as if cheating is okay.
Whether this is true or not, I felt like the whole story was "you" portraying yourself as an innocent and nice person, trying to convince us that you're not a shitty person, which you are.
Oh boy, another good person humiliated by scum...
But this doesn't sound like a real experience, more like a story, which I hope it is, and I hope others don't take notes and never cheat thinking they'll get away with it.
No amount of eloquent writing will erase your title of cheater, not gain u sympathy.
Hopefully u learned from this, temptation must be nipped in the bud, nobody can make you do anything intimacy wise (unless u were raped, which would be a completely different story).
I agree with prof don. However I'm actually glad you didn't tell your boyfriend. It would have crushed him, especially at that young age.
On the male side the urge to cheat is even worse because women are attracted to taken men because they are "in demand". Not to bash you ladies but it's really frustrating and unfair. I remember in my last relationship I was offered sex 3 times in 2 months from random women. I had the willpower to turn them all down but it wasn't easy.
Anyway I cheated on my first girlfriend at 16. After that I vowed to never do that. 16 years later I kept that promise after several relationships.
I hope you grow from this experience and don't chalk it up as a "cute mistake" because it was nothing but. I know I felt horrible when I cheated on my first girlfriend.
@BambooforPanda NOT TRUE. I am absolutely NOT more attracted to woman if she already has boyfriend and ESPECIALLY not attracted to her if she is married. I might feel envy towards her bf/husband. However if he is a good guy... a part of me is happy for them. Men are absolutely NOT attracted to taken women at the same rate as women are attracted to taken men.
@sdistotallyme you're totally welcome to think that, and I never insisted that you personally were going to try to sleep with a woman in a relationship, so I don't get why you're so offended. I know that I've gotten more attention from guys since I started dating. I know I've seen it happen to other women. That's just how it works. If a man or woman is already getting attention from someone, ie a boyfriend/girlfriend, they look more desirable because someone is desiring them. This isn't something that only affects one sex.
Quit saying you were in love with the first guy you were not in love no matter how many times you tell yourself you were. Most people seem to have a very low standard pathetic definition of what constitutes as love nowadays because whatever you felt for Matt sure as hell wasn't love. It was just lust. And then another lust came along in mexico.
18
0 Reply
Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
You never loved Matt at all you were simply using him for your entertainment as happiness. YOUR HAPPINESS DOES NOT EQUAL EVERYBODY BEING HAPPY AS IF YOUR SOME BEING AT THE CENTRE OF THE UNIVERSE. STOP TRYING TO WRITE TAKES TO TRY AND MANIPULATE THE RIGHT THING IN THE MINDS OF PEOPLE SO THAT YOU CAN HAVE YOUR OWN WAY AND ACCEPT THAT YOUR EXTREMELY IMMATURE AND DECEPTIVE FOR TRYING TO MAKE YOURSELF AS SOMEKIND OF VICTIM IN THIS SITUATION. KEEP THAT BULLSHIT WITHIN THE GIRL WORLD. WE DONT NEED OR WANT ANY OF IT.
I think the bigger issue in the take is the explanation not the cheating itself for me at least committing a crime and playing the victim is a standard tactic of women in my understanding.
@Bluemax Haha, don't be! It was very cleverly hidden. Only reason I caught on, I think, is because I'm prone to rcognize other writers. And this is pretty well-written, I just don't care for the troll-iness.
Dang these GAG users went in on you! I'm not even going to attack you or wish you harm like others. I still don't feel like you learned the severity of this act based on your later comment about Oliver. What you had for Oliver was lust, not love. You loved your boyfriend but you weren't in love with him.
What's your point? Is this your pathetic attempt to excuse what you did because you 'felt butterflies'?
You're a cheater. Deal with it. And don't for one second think that not telling your boyfriend was the right move and don't either think that you 'loved' him. You fucking didn't.
I Cheated On My Boyfriend And Got Away With It Kudos to you in my opinion however I find as a gal you're going to get blasted far far far more than a guy would. Guys seem to be held way less accountable and responsible for cheating if anything the gal is blamed either for not putting out, not putting out enough, or not doing what the guy wanted sexually. Somehow someway the girlfriend is at fault for the guy cheating on her usually with a tag along of this being 'evidence' that gals like a-holes instead of nice guys.
However when it comes to gals it seems gals do not get that 'excuse' as the image seems to be the guy is always ever willing so the gal is just a slut for cheating.
You serious. Guys get destroyed and it comes across as worse because the girl becomes an emotional wreck. But for girls a few Tears and shess treated less harshly
Whether this event was real or not, thats pretty damn shitty of you. Stop trying to get everyone on your side of the matter and convince us what you did is okay, because its not. And if its a story, I don't really see a lesson in it, just "Hey, I cheated on my boyfriend".
You cheated on someone you loved AND lied about it for 5 years? Some people are just a piece's of shit/ waste of skin I guess... I hope Karma comes back to you on this one, it will be beautiful when you get your heart torn out through your asshole, when that happens just know that you deserve it.
I'd imagine it's much more difficult for girls. Temptation surrounds y'all - it doesn't surround guys. We practically have to become sherlock holmes to find where temptation is hiding. But this is all true even when single.
in my opinion, everyone gets one. They say "once a cheater always a cheater" but I don't think that's true. I think it's "twice a cheater always a cheater". If you cheat once, that relationship is essentially over, but in the objective sense you have undergone a learning experience. You have learned rather or not cheating is something you are more generally comfortable with. In your case, you learned that you are not, and have thus never cheated since. Other people do not discover any hidden guilt or pain, and proceed to cheat a second time. Once that second time is cleared, they are a cheater for life.
From your take, you sound like you didn't really get away with it. He may have not known, but the guilt was eating at your soul. The guilt alone should have told you that cheating isn't justifiable.
10
0 Reply
Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
So, another cheater writing a myTake and? "I realized cheating isn’t always a malicious act, but instead a fleeting moment of weakness and temptation." And trying to downplay the damage. You cheated on the dude and still kept dating him for 5 years, that's just... low; extremely low.
Yada, yada, yada, excuse, rationalization. Seen it all before. Who do you think you're fooling? You cheat on your boyfriend, still think you had a great time doing it, but expect us to feel sorry for you? I couldn't even stomach reading the whole thing.
I'm calling bs on this story, everything about it sounds made up, popular jock boyfriend gets cheated on during spring break in Cancun with exotic mystery man... you forgot to mention you were a cheerleader.
Well I have to reread her story. Because I forgot my violin. I need to play my violin while I read a story. But that was humorous and sarcastic. I think this entire putdown of this girl is ridiculous. She didn't marry the fucking guy. What she dated for five years. What a waste of five years. Being with other people and that includes fucking helps you learn about life you not so god damn naïve. I applaud her. I'm not putting her down good for you you go girl
' cheating isn't always a malicious act but a fleeting moment of vulnerability and weakness '
women often suffer from this delusion that they are not responsible and that they just 'lost control' in ' the moment'. Realistically though, you knew exactly what you were doing.
I find it interesting that you said that the worst pain of all was the heartbreak of never seeing Oliver again... so if that's true, then you no longer loved your boyfriend. This is not gray at all.
I'm glad you got that turned around. There was a gal who loved me once, but wanted too much too soon while living too far away (in the Philippines) at the worst possible time in my life for me to give it to her (just a year after getting my heart ripped out by the previous girl who was also from that country.)
I didn't cheat; I simply walked away. Wasn't ready. Good thing her and I are still friends. Sometimes, opportunities come into our lives when we're not prepared to deal with them. And not all of us handle it wisely.
If that guy ever does walk back into your life, you will need to come clean. Tell him that for years, after cheating on him one time, you have had difficulty forgiving yourself. See how he reacts. If he is still angry after all this time, he was never right for you in the first place. If he can forgive you, then it's more than time you forgave yourself.
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
93Opinion
Hmmm let me think my girlfriend is amazing, I'm a good looking guy and I attract cute girls here and there. Do I feel heavy attractionv towards one or two of them every s and so? fuck yeah, Do I Stare at their booties thinking of how it would feel? guilty as fuck.
Now while I might feel this cripling attraction to some ladies I have met during the years with my lady. I have only kept it i my head, never cheated cause cheating is a choice. It's never a "moment of weakness" and I'm a guy. while I'm not gonna give you shit for doing it I advice to you that you dont rationalize on it, dont dwell either but dont talk as if cheating is okay.
Amen.
At least you handle your attraction the right way.
Other people are not as smart as you are. haha
well I can't help to be attracted to hot girls but I can decide what I act on
Whether this is true or not, I felt like the whole story was "you" portraying yourself as an innocent and nice person, trying to convince us that you're not a shitty person, which you are.
Oh boy, another good person humiliated by scum...
But this doesn't sound like a real experience, more like a story, which I hope it is, and I hope others don't take notes and never cheat thinking they'll get away with it.
#NoSympathy #NoExcuses
No amount of eloquent writing will erase your title of cheater, not gain u sympathy.
Hopefully u learned from this, temptation must be nipped in the bud, nobody can make you do anything intimacy wise (unless u were raped, which would be a completely different story).
No amount of eloquent writing will erase your title of cheater, not gain u sympathy.
so I feel the same
bitches will be bitches
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y-nQN-RRT6c
I agree with prof don. However I'm actually glad you didn't tell your boyfriend. It would have crushed him, especially at that young age.
On the male side the urge to cheat is even worse because women are attracted to taken men because they are "in demand". Not to bash you ladies but it's really frustrating and unfair. I remember in my last relationship I was offered sex 3 times in 2 months from random women. I had the willpower to turn them all down but it wasn't easy.
Anyway I cheated on my first girlfriend at 16. After that I vowed to never do that. 16 years later I kept that promise after several relationships.
I hope you grow from this experience and don't chalk it up as a "cute mistake" because it was nothing but. I know I felt horrible when I cheated on my first girlfriend.
@sdistotallyme Men are attracted to taken women for the same reasons.
@BambooforPanda NOT TRUE. I am absolutely NOT more attracted to woman if she already has boyfriend and ESPECIALLY not attracted to her if she is married. I might feel envy towards her bf/husband. However if he is a good guy... a part of me is happy for them. Men are absolutely NOT attracted to taken women at the same rate as women are attracted to taken men.
@sdistotallyme you're totally welcome to think that, and I never insisted that you personally were going to try to sleep with a woman in a relationship, so I don't get why you're so offended. I know that I've gotten more attention from guys since I started dating. I know I've seen it happen to other women. That's just how it works. If a man or woman is already getting attention from someone, ie a boyfriend/girlfriend, they look more desirable because someone is desiring them. This isn't something that only affects one sex.
Quit saying you were in love with the first guy you were not in love no matter how many times you tell yourself you were. Most people seem to have a very low standard pathetic definition of what constitutes as love nowadays because whatever you felt for Matt sure as hell wasn't love. It was just lust. And then another lust came along in mexico.
You never loved Matt at all you were simply using him for your entertainment as happiness. YOUR HAPPINESS DOES NOT EQUAL EVERYBODY BEING HAPPY AS IF YOUR SOME BEING AT THE CENTRE OF THE UNIVERSE. STOP TRYING TO WRITE TAKES TO TRY AND MANIPULATE THE RIGHT THING IN THE MINDS OF PEOPLE SO THAT YOU CAN HAVE YOUR OWN WAY AND ACCEPT THAT YOUR EXTREMELY IMMATURE AND DECEPTIVE FOR TRYING TO MAKE YOURSELF AS SOMEKIND OF VICTIM IN THIS SITUATION. KEEP THAT BULLSHIT WITHIN THE GIRL WORLD. WE DONT NEED OR WANT ANY OF IT.
Girl world? News flash, guys cheat as well.
I think the bigger issue in the take is the explanation not the cheating itself for me at least committing a crime and playing the victim is a standard tactic of women in my understanding.
I don't know what you read but I sure as hell didn't hear a victim. I don't know what makes a 20 year old boy a relationship expert
Hmmm, something tell me that there is no Matt and Oliver. LOL
It's a decent piece of fictional writing, but look at all the people you're riling up. Maybe next time post with a disclaimer of some sort.
You know, I am starting to feel a bit sheepish. Looking back it does seem sort of like a drama, doesn't it?
@Bluemax Haha, don't be! It was very cleverly hidden. Only reason I caught on, I think, is because I'm prone to rcognize other writers. And this is pretty well-written, I just don't care for the troll-iness.
Dang these GAG users went in on you! I'm not even going to attack you or wish you harm like others. I still don't feel like you learned the severity of this act based on your later comment about Oliver. What you had for Oliver was lust, not love. You loved your boyfriend but you weren't in love with him.
What's your point? Is this your pathetic attempt to excuse what you did because you 'felt butterflies'?
You're a cheater. Deal with it. And don't for one second think that not telling your boyfriend was the right move and don't either think that you 'loved' him. You fucking didn't.
I Cheated On My Boyfriend And Got Away With It
Kudos to you in my opinion however I find as a gal you're going to get blasted far far far more than a guy would. Guys seem to be held way less accountable and responsible for cheating if anything the gal is blamed either for not putting out, not putting out enough, or not doing what the guy wanted sexually. Somehow someway the girlfriend is at fault for the guy cheating on her usually with a tag along of this being 'evidence' that gals like a-holes instead of nice guys.
However when it comes to gals it seems gals do not get that 'excuse' as the image seems to be the guy is always ever willing so the gal is just a slut for cheating.
You serious. Guys get destroyed and it comes across as worse because the girl becomes an emotional wreck. But for girls a few Tears and shess treated less harshly
Whether this event was real or not, thats pretty damn shitty of you. Stop trying to get everyone on your side of the matter and convince us what you did is okay, because its not. And if its a story, I don't really see a lesson in it, just "Hey, I cheated on my boyfriend".
You cheated on someone you loved AND lied about it for 5 years? Some people are just a piece's of shit/ waste of skin I guess... I hope Karma comes back to you on this one, it will be beautiful when you get your heart torn out through your asshole, when that happens just know that you deserve it.
I'd imagine it's much more difficult for girls. Temptation surrounds y'all - it doesn't surround guys. We practically have to become sherlock holmes to find where temptation is hiding. But this is all true even when single.
in my opinion, everyone gets one. They say "once a cheater always a cheater" but I don't think that's true. I think it's "twice a cheater always a cheater". If you cheat once, that relationship is essentially over, but in the objective sense you have undergone a learning experience. You have learned rather or not cheating is something you are more generally comfortable with. In your case, you learned that you are not, and have thus never cheated since. Other people do not discover any hidden guilt or pain, and proceed to cheat a second time. Once that second time is cleared, they are a cheater for life.
You repulse me.
Fair enough everyone makes mistakes, but cheating is a choice. A choice you wouldn't make if you really loved him.
I do hope you learned from your mistakes and at the very least be a human being and tell him.
From your take, you sound like you didn't really get away with it. He may have not known, but the guilt was eating at your soul. The guilt alone should have told you that cheating isn't justifiable.
So, another cheater writing a myTake and?
"I realized cheating isn’t always a malicious act, but instead a fleeting moment of weakness and temptation." And trying to downplay the damage. You cheated on the dude and still kept dating him for 5 years, that's just... low; extremely low.
And she also felt the worst about not being able to see the guy she knew for one week again. Not the part where she betrayed someone who loved her.
Yada, yada, yada, excuse, rationalization. Seen it all before. Who do you think you're fooling? You cheat on your boyfriend, still think you had a great time doing it, but expect us to feel sorry for you? I couldn't even stomach reading the whole thing.
My thoughts exactly.
I hope you truly learned from your experience, and do not repeat it.
I'm calling bs on this story, everything about it sounds made up, popular jock boyfriend gets cheated on during spring break in Cancun with exotic mystery man... you forgot to mention you were a cheerleader.
Well I have to reread her story. Because I forgot my violin. I need to play my violin while I read a story. But that was humorous and sarcastic. I think this entire putdown of this girl is ridiculous. She didn't marry the fucking guy. What she dated for five years. What a waste of five years. Being with other people and that includes fucking helps you learn about life you not so god damn naïve. I applaud her. I'm not putting her down good for you you go girl
' cheating isn't always a malicious act but a fleeting moment of vulnerability and weakness '
women often suffer from this delusion that they are not responsible and that they just 'lost control' in ' the moment'. Realistically though, you knew exactly what you were doing.
I find it interesting that you said that the worst pain of all was the heartbreak of never seeing Oliver again...
so if that's true, then you no longer loved your boyfriend. This is not gray at all.
Yep. Seems like you're one of the only people who noticed that and commented on it.
I'm glad you got that turned around. There was a gal who loved me once, but wanted too much too soon while living too far away (in the Philippines) at the worst possible time in my life for me to give it to her (just a year after getting my heart ripped out by the previous girl who was also from that country.)
I didn't cheat; I simply walked away. Wasn't ready. Good thing her and I are still friends. Sometimes, opportunities come into our lives when we're not prepared to deal with them. And not all of us handle it wisely.
If that guy ever does walk back into your life, you will need to come clean. Tell him that for years, after cheating on him one time, you have had difficulty forgiving yourself. See how he reacts. If he is still angry after all this time, he was never right for you in the first place. If he can forgive you, then it's more than time you forgave yourself.