Dating Outside Your Race

Anonymous
Dating Outside Your Race

About fifty times a day, someone is asking on Gag, "should I date someone outside of my race," or stating that, "my parents/friends don't like my partner because s/he is not my same race, what should I do?"

Here's the thing. If you are a person who wants to date someone outside of your own race, there is nothing stopping you from doing so. There are no laws in the US against it. If the only reason all those other people are questioning your relationship or you, IS solely because of your partner's race or skin color, know that you are treading in the racist waters. You don't need to make excuses for others or try to justify their actions because they are family or friends. Know it for what it is. I don't know many people who like someone else only because they 100% are the same race as them. Good relationships aren't built on skin color or race alone; there is something about the other person that attracts you and that you like beyond the exterior--otherwise, you wouldn't even want to date them in the first place.

Dating Outside Your Race

You can try, and I hope you do, to change the minds of racist people or family who think otherwise, but the truth of the matter is, a lot of times you can't and never will because they are set in their racist ways or it's been handed down and taught to them, that 'this is the way it has been and should be for all time'. If someone like your parents still think race mixing is some huge problem or they are going to shun you or never accept your partner, they are going to do it because they are racist.

You can't change your family, but you shouldn't allow their racism to change who it is you are and what you believe and want for your own life. When you give in and agree to break-up for no other reason, than your partner's race, you become no better than your parents or friends, by helping to further perpetuate stereotypes and racism.

Dating Outside Your Race

You need to find something in yourself that is stronger than that. I've heard people say, well, I can't go against my parents will, and they're like in their late 20's or 30's and living on their own. It's like, when do you get to live for yourself and make your own decisions about your own life if not when you no longer live with your parents and are on your own? If a parent questioning your relationship based on race alone is the thing that is going to break you and make you just ditch someone you love or like, then I doubt you really had anything real going on with that person anyway if that's all it takes. If you really like or love someone, you're willing to fight for them and what they mean to you. If it's not "the norm," make it one. It starts with you saying enough is enough, I want to date the person who makes me happy regardless of their skin color or where they did or did not come from.

Dating Outside Your Race

There are people who have been jailed, beaten, and even killed, so that at least in the US, you are free to date and marry whom you choose, and you should take that to heart, and not continue to make their efforts in vain if you want to date someone outside of your own race. In the end, I don't think the real question for you would be, what do I do if others have a problem with it, but are you in actuality, the one that sees some problem with dating outside your race?

Dating Outside Your Race
64 Opinion