Yes, Racial Dating Preferences Are Racist

Yes, Racial Dating Preferences Are Racist

I'm just not attracted to black girls.” “Asian guys aren’t my type.” Hearing phrases like these is incredibly common and, by and large, accepted. You’re not super into black guys, though, but that’s just another preference, right? On the other hand, if someone were to comment that “I just don’t like working with Hispanics,” they would be called out for racism. So why do we accept it when people say, “I’m not really into Arab girls”?

Preferences for people you’re romantically or sexually interested in can be wide-ranging. Sense of humor, height, freckles, muscles, taste in movies—all of these are valid preferences. Saying you don’t find a race of people attractive, however, is racism. If you view an entire group of people as “not your type” and the only thing they all have in common is their race, then you have a problem.

Not everyone of a certain race looks the same

When you say you don't like a certain race, you're denying everyone from that race. Every race has diversity. Not everyone looks same. An example of it is Singer Bjork from Iceland, though it is easy to assume she is East Asian because of her features, yet she is Scandinavian. She doesn’t fit the stereotypical view of how Icelandic/Scandinavian women are supposed to look like.

Not everyone is same

Not everyone in a race is same. Consider Asians for example. Their population is 4.3 Billion. Is it even possible that more than 50 percent world population is Identical? They're nerdy is a common stereotype which is false for many

Race is a social Construct, Not Genetical

This is commonly known fact. If a white man can satisfy you then black man can do it too. As I 've mentioned in point before, it is possible to find two people with same emotions but different races. Yet if you choose to date a person based on his Race then clearly you're RACIST

Our Selection isn't "Natural"

Our so-called natural personal preferences are not truly natural or personal. We are not born with such a narrow scope of what is attractive. What we find attractive is culturally created and culturally enforced. Social conditioning governs this arena. We are all taught from a very young age what we should find attractive in others and this is reinforced through culture, the media, and the advertising industry (e.g. Fairness creams)

By declaring that you won’t date a certain race implies that you think a certain race has something universally in common that you don’t like and since the only thing they have in common is socially constructed categorization, you’re uncomfortable to a significant degree, which is RACIST.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I agree. However I have these things to point out:
    1) Usually it is not the race itself that I don't prefer. It's rather the culture. I find Arabs attractive but I will wouldn't like to be with one. I find East Asian guys hot too, but I don't prefer their culture as well. However if anyone ends up sharing the same values with me, I would love to be with him.
    2) The nature thing is absolutely true. It is never about the nature, it is about hierarchy.
    3) Again, when I say that Bengali guys aren't my type, I don't mean I hate my own race. I don't like the nature of our men. If anyone proves to be different, he's a definite catch.

    I hope this explained a bit.


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What Girls Said 50

  • So, this has nothing to do with the take itself but Iceland is not a Scandinavian country. I think you meant Nordic.

    What comes to racial preferences, I disagree to a certain extent. If having a racial preference means that you have a type (as in you tend to find people from certain races more attractive), I wouldn't consider that racist. This is what I consider racial preference.

    However, if having a racial preference means you will refuse to date outside your "type" without even giving a chance to someone because of their race, that's racist. As you said, you can't group people together just based on their race.

    But even if our personal preferences aren't natural, what can we do about it? We can't exactly pretend to find someone attractive, can we? Obviously attraction is about more than just appearance but it's still a major part of it.

  • No it IS NOT, you can not help who you're attracted to period.

    • Bollocks comment, attractiveness is a social construct, people are conditioned by society to who they like, during the ages people were attracted to beards, then they weren't, now they are again because society once more thinks it is acceptable to have beards. If natural selection existed, women would either like beards or not. Hence it does not exist.

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    • i cannot see your comment on my screen @princesspie

    • Knowing you, he's nuts.

  • I need to disagree with you in that point. If homosexual people aren´t attracted to the other gender, are they automatically against this gender? of course not. Same thing with the race thing. I´m not into black guys, or southern types. It´s just not my type and if I had they choice between two good looking guys, one black, one white (only concidering their apprearance), I´d choose the white guy. We can literally not choose who we are attracted to, it´s nothing our brain controls. We cannot change it, period. (still, only considering people´s apprearance)

    • Race is a social construct though.. Whereas we are naturally attracted to a certain "gender"..

    • @JDavid25 No, that's nonsense. Just because race is a social construct doesn't change the fact that people of the different races look distinctly different with overtly different facial features, hair and body proportions. All blacks have Afro-type hair, so if someone doesn't' like Afro hair, they will never date blacks and won't want to pass that hair onto their children.

    • @JDavid25

      So if race is a social construct, how can you be racist?

  • I prefer brown eyes to blue eyes.
    Is that racist?
    I prefer brown hair to blonde hair.
    Is that racist?
    I prefer white skin to black skin.
    Is that really racist?

    I treat ALL people the same, except my boyfriend gets preferential treatment as he is THE special one!

    I think you are confusing colour with race. They are not quite the same thing. Do you really think I should have sex with a black guy just to even it up, as my first guy is white?

  • You’ve compared two very different things. Work and attraction towards a person.

    If a person doesn’t want to work with someone because they’re Asian (or of any other race), there is already a prejudice held by that person; they might think Asians are (for example) too annoying, too picky, too whatever. THAT is when it’s racism. When you think one trait (especially a negative one) applies to the whole race.

    When we’re talking about attraction, it is totally different. Firstly you can’t choose who you’re attracted to. Secondly, every race has a “general appearance”, otherwise they wouldn’t be categorized as Asian, Black, White, etc. If the world really was as diverse as you portray it to be, there wouldn’t be racial differences at all. But they are. Because different races have distinct features, that the rest of the people within that race share. Some people are simply not attracted to these general features.

    Simple as that.

  • Interesting. I had always thought it was just a preference but I do like the points you've made here.

  • People should be able to date who they want without someone screaming racism at them. I dont date outside my race. That is my preference. You wouldn't date a 80 year old woman would you? By your logic if you didn't... you are an ageist. You can't go around shaming or bulling people because they dont want to date someone.

    • Ageist hahahahaah

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    • Everybody was talking about natural selection and getting into the science of it all so i did too.

    • She always usin that same argument that can easily be debunked, but she stays usin like it proves a point.. LMAO..

  • i think those of us who are not brainwashed by the media are often driven by primordial instinct which has to do with genetics.

    i know that i've only ever gotten wet when i saw and was near certain men who all happened to be east Asian. that has never happened to me with men from any other race and i lived in a western country for many years.

    • i didn't have any bad or traumatic experiences with other races of men, i just wasn't attracted so i didn't feel like doing anything with them so i followed my instinct. my father is caucasian and i love my father more than anything and we've always been close. that's why i'm secure enough to know what i want and follow it.

  • I think it's batshit but more selection for me <3
    I 100% agree with this "By declaring that you won’t date a certain race implies that you think a certain race has something universally in common that you don’t like" and this is messed up because there is so much diversity within each ethnicity. Basically it's like, if it's not white, Indian, black, etc it's not right. And that is prejudiced.

  • I think that racism is the total abnegation and eventually hate towards a race in your mind, while in this case it is only a sexual preference and it's personal and usually private umm example:
    "I make friends with everyone idc about the race, though only western men sexually attract me"
    Maybe it's sexual prejudice, but I think everyone has that kind of prejudice one way or another...
    "I wouldn't like a boyfriend with long nose" = preference, prejudice
    "I wouldn't like a boyfriend with blue eyes" = preference, prejudice
    "Muscular guys are hot, train yourself and maybe come back later" = preference

    • Haha the last one = preference, sexist.
      No different then me saying: Blonde girls are hot, dye your hair and maybe come back later.

    • @markxcds yup saying it only jokingly hehe

  • I agree 1000%
    'Preference' my a$$
    Hiding under that word, said with respect to an entire race...
    Is blatant Racism.

    How can an entire race be unattractive? No two people are exactly alike, even twins! Personalities differ regardless of the color of skin as well as bodily features. To me it says a lot about a person who makes such statements. I don't judge, I just understand where their minds are. And your last point hit the nail on the head. Society has taught people to think certain ways, to have particular perceptions of what is beautiful for decades. So the people who deny it, I feel some pity for, they do not even realize they have been 'brainwashed'. It is a sad but true phenomenon but at the same time we know and understand that ignorance is bliss. Smh. I hope that time brings them wisdom.

    • Every race has certain features that are distinct to that race. Some people might not be attracted to those features. Pretty simple.

      Nor is someone's personal attraction anyone else's business.

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    • Are you ok? You don't seem capable of comprehending what people say and keep blabbering on that same irrelevant things. It's impossible to have a mature discussion with you.

    • And given you're apparently so well educated, why don't you lead by example. Show me the research and 'shut me down'. However I really struggle to believe you're capable of that considering you can't even answer my questions.

  • So it makes me racist I prefer pale skin a lot over not-pale skin? Doesn't matter where a person is from- if they're not pale, the chance I might be attracted to them drops significantly.

    But well, if this makes me racist... then I guess I am? Lol.

    • This is just more SJW crap designed to antagonize and divide. Because of this BS if you still say you have a sexual preference you can be attacked as racist. A powerful attack for the left and as contrived as anything.

  • No, I don't think it is. Though not everyone in a race looks the same. Each race does have certain characteristics that are different from one another., and I do have preferences for certain races, like I prefer Asians for their cute body types and faces as well as white people because I find pale skin attractive, but occasionally there will be an acceptation, like a really cute dark skinned girl. I'm just more drawn to certain races.

  • I disagree. You can’t force attraction nor can you help who you’re attracted to.

  • I do disagree with you to an extent. I've always found that the distinction is actually this: If you're just not generally attracted to people of a certain race then there's nothing wrong, it's a preference, but if you are attracted to someone but won't date them for the sole reason of their race that's actual racism. Telling someone they have to be attracted to someone they're not is kind of ridiculous.

  • I think you're wrong.
    People should not be condemned by voicing out their preferences.

    My coworkers tells me a lot he doesn't like to do business with French people.
    I know many companies who don't like doing business with Japanese companies.
    Are they racist? No, it's a matter of culture and dealing with things.

    Overall I can tell you that I'm not in the least attracted to Japanese men, yet my husband happens to be Japanese.
    The same way I'm not attracted to all Caucasian people back in my country, but I can also tell you that I find a much higher percentage of Caucasian people attractive and beautiful just by looking into a crowd than I find Asian/ Japanese people.

    Then there's also the separate issue of actually considering dating someone just because you think they're beautiful or attractive.
    Not racism at all.

    • I like black girls because their pussy looks pink compared to their skin color. Do you think it's racist?

    • @sexxxyboy No, I don't actually.

  • In Sweden I can't remember getting hit on, just shy swedes having regular conversations with me, *sigh, they're hopeless. Never saw African-Americans guys til I moved to US at age 12. They started hitting on me, so my preference was: black guys, the darker the better. Didn't realize I lived in a racist little town, and none of the white guys hit on me, which was fine by me. Kind of found their pale, reddish skin sorta unattractive anyway.

    Moved temporarily to France and relentlessly got hit on by whites with serious charm. My new preference was: white guys, the lighter the better, and it stayed that way.

    Started thinking about what I wanted. Whites usually have a thinner, smoother grade of hair. Want my kids to have super easy hair to comb. Also, the thought of marrying an "opposite", with me and a blond dude is appealing. Which is so crazy, cuz i used to think blond was the least attractive hair color. Now I'm crazy about it.

    But black guys still have sexier bodies...

  • I don't think it's racist. I'm African and I am always attracted to white guys mainly but once in a while some African boys catch my eyes. it is just my preference.

  • For me, I am not attracted to Indian men. Not just because of the way they look, but the whole country and their beliefs and how they treat people. That doesn't make me racist since I still respect them but just wouldn't date them.

    • It does indeed make you racist, because you are stereotyping half a billion people. If not racist, ita ignorant and intolerant.

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    • @NeglectedChild actually I was referring to middle eastern people when I said brown people. "But you have your last say anyway sweetheart"

    • @anniisa If anything the perception of Middle Eastern people is far worse. But yes, I agree with what you said.

  • I'll just explain this in an analogy

    Say you love ice cream. All flavors. If it's ice cream, you'll love it.
    But let's say that of you were given the option to pick between flavors. You pick vanilla. Everyone gets upset because vanilla is a basic flavor. But you prefer vanilla. That doesn't mean you don't love all the other ice cream less, you just prefer a few flavors more than the others.

    • I can't believe you are comparing this to ice cream, you just want vanilla ice cream don't you.

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What Guys Said 128

  • There are many attributes which may make a woman appealing or unappealing to me as a romantic interest. I refuse to date a smoker, so I am tobaccophobic (even though all smokers are not alike.) I refuse to date a woman who is not intelligent so I am stupidphobic (while some are not as stupid as others.) And I am not interested in dating a woman less than 5' 0" tall so I am midgetphobic (but mot all are munchkins.)

    The essence of the SJW's sword is to tell me that my preferences aren't valid because. . . the SJW has decided that my preferences are not valid. Then, I am called a name - racist - as a means of trying to shame me into altering my preferences (and these are the same SJW's who rail about "slut shaming!") This demonstrates that the SJW has a far better social conscience than do I, and we should all throw roses at their feet. Hopefully, some day, I will learn to be as good a person as they are.

    This same SJW strokes his own ego for being such a tolerant person; yes, they are accepting of everyone in the world of diversity. . . except those with whom they disagree. Their is no tolerance for disagreement with the SJW. Why shouldn't they call us names? After all, they have decided that we who disagree are motivated by hate. But from whose lips spring forth the disparaging words?

    I grew up in the Old South. I remember water fountains labeled "White" and "Colored." I remember restaurants in which there were no black people other than the employees. But there was never a time when someone came to me and said, "OAW, you must agree to never date a black woman." When I reached puberty, I did not sit and contemplate whether I should be attracted to black girls. That was never a conscious decision. I also did not contemplate whether I should prefer big boobs or small boobs, blonde hair or brunette hair, tall girls or short girls. I cannot control my lack of attraction to black women and more than I can control my strong preference for petite women. There is no conscious process of deciding to reject a black woman because she is black. I am simply not attracted, and concluding that my lack of attraction proves a conscious, racially-biased attitude is absurd.

    However, I do want to extend my thanks to you on a slightly unrelated subject. While Mr. Trump was not my first or second choice for the Republican nomination, I was a never Hillary voter. The absurd SJW mentality really motivated conservative voters and helped defeat Ms. Clinton. Thank you!

    • You had me until the politics.

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    • Just a rant really and the first two are not relevant because they are lifestyle choices.

    • @markxcds And that observation is irrelevant to my primary point: we do not consciously select the attributes to which we are attracted or which we find unattractive, so inferring an "attitude" about race on the basis of a lack of attraction is just SJW manure.

  • And what exactly do you plan to do about it? Force people to date people they don't want to?

    People who share your viewpoint are in the minority so it doesn't matter how much you cry racism, you aren't going to be able to change anyone's dating preferences. Even if it did become socially unnacceptable to say you aren't attracted to a certain race people would just lie about their preferences but still avoid dating the people they find undesirable.

  • So... let me ask you this... if you don't like red hair are you likely to consider dating and are you likely to fall in love with a red head? No? Is that then assuming that there's something all red heads have in common? No two people are the same so... obviously that's racist against people with red hair right? Now let me ask... if a white girl only finds black guys attractive... is she racist?

    Do you see where the logic falls apart? Racism refers to perceiving someone as genetically superior or inferior based on certain physical traits. If a girl only finds black guys attractive that must mean she sees other guys as unattractive so... based on a certain physical trait, she has concluded that white guys are inferior to black guys right?

    Say there are two girls I'm considering asking on a date. Say one has black hair and the other has red hair... now let's say I ask the red head on a date because I don't think black hair is very attractive... is that racism? It's a defining physical trait and I've decided to make a judgement based on it. Am I racist for it? Maybe I am, maybe I'm not, but no one would ever assume that I am.

    I think the only reason to assume racism is because that's the context of the world we live in. History has displayed racism so we assume people are still just plain racist (and obviously some people are), but... if a girl thinking she doesn't want to date skinny or fat guys isn't racist because she wants her guy to be buff, then in what way is she be racist for thinking a black guy is more attractive than a white guy? I'm using this specific example because it's harder to argue against. Obviously there are probably white people who will only date white people because they truly have something against anyone who doesn't share their ethnicity, but to say it's objectively racist to have skin color, or ethnic preferences in terms of what one finds attractive is naive at best and foolish at worst. If you can't say I'm racist for liking redheads more than brunettes, then you can't say I'm racist if I prefer black girls either.

    Now to clairify... again there are obviously those who claim "racial preference" when really they're just racist... there will also be people to call those who just have an ethnic preference racists for doing so. Never make such a broad judgement if you're trying to fix an issue... precision is the difference between a butcher and a surgeon.

  • It is 100% okay to have any standards you want, when it comes to who you choose to let touch your genitals. Trying to shame people by accusing them of being being racist for their preferences, is not going to change those preferences. If anything, these false racist accusations, are starting to make people stop caring about being called a racist. If everything is racist, then nothing is racist. Quit trying to control the sex lives of everyone else around you.

    This is no different than only dating people that share a religion or political outlook that you find compatible. Would you find it acceptable to shame Muslim women into sleeping with men outside of her religion as well? Maybe you could organize a protest against such women to ruin her reputation and make her lose her job, until she decides to give it up to some atheist guy to prove she isn't a bigot.

    It comes across as really rapey to suggest that women should not be allowed to have full choice over the kind of guys they date, which is exactly what you are doing right now.

    Even if it was racist not to date certain races, and I don't believe it is, so what? Even if you could prove that it is a form of racism, that particular form of racism, would be more of a technicality, than some horrible wrong that needs to be fixed. The civil rights movement had nothing to do with shaming people into having sex with people they didn't want to have sex with, because it simply is not an issue that needs to be addressed.

    If a woman doesn't want to date me because of my race, I am not so pathetic that I would attempt to shame her into dating me by calling her a racist. She wouldn't be violating my rights at all. No one owes me a relationship, just like I don't owe her a relationship. It isn't like they are refusing to hire me, or that they are using violence against me. In fact I knew a woman that didn't want to date men of my race, that I was still friends with. It simply isn't an issue.

  • So if we're to put any stock in your arguments (which I don't by the way), people are supposed to apologize or feel guilty for being attracted to those they're attracted to? That is, if for example, they are white and only sexually/romantically attracted to other white people? And this makes them racist? This proves that they believe one or more race or races is inherently superior to others? That's just bullshit. Whether or not the concept of race is a "social construct" or not, that doesn't negate the fact that different ethnicities evolved for a reason. People tend to gravitate to those with whom they're most familiar and share certain cultural ties with. There's nothing wrong with that. For those who do have a preference for dating people of different races that is fine for them. But to call those who don't "racist" is just ridiculous.

  • You completely missed addressing anyone who's racial dating preferences didn't include the word "all," implied or otherwise. I think the problem you're addressing isn't very common the way that you address it, and you're argument is basically against a straw-man you constructed.

    There are plenty of very, VERY attractive women of all colors and ethnicities. I don't think it's fair to call me racist because I objectively recognize that I have a preference for lighter skin tones (to a certain point) and certain physical proportions that are more common among white women than woman of most other colors and ethnicities.

    I don't care what race you are. But how you smell and how you look affect how attracted I am to you. I didn't decide that.

    The question you should really be addressing is, does it make me racist if it turns out that the smells and looks I find most attractive are much more common among white women than among the woman of most other races?

    What if I've figured that out about myself, and I use racial language to help describe the phenomenon, not as a rule for its own sake (I. E. I'm not attracted to black people) but rather as a general observation (I. E. Hey, turns out I'm not attracted to many black people).

    I think most people mean to describe their preferences not based really on socially constructed categorization, but end up using racial language because it happens to generally correspond (in many but not all cases) to their natural preferences.

    I'd be very interested to hear whether people think that the sort of racial dating preferences that ACTUALLY EXIST for most people are racist.

  • No that's incorrect. Each group of people have certain traits, some times people don't find those traits as attractive as others. In order to be racist you need to believe in the innate superiority or inferiority of a group of people, what your describing has absolutely nothing to do with that concept ergo it has nothing to do with racism. It is preference plain and simple and you trying to guilt people into being attracted to some one or some trait that they don't is not going to change that, it will only breed resentment.

  • My attitude to all these illogical arguments is TOUGH SHIT. I am not racist and can show it quite easily. In fact, any one that knows me will know how I can do that.

    Yet there are certain types of woman that I would never date. That is the way things are. For no other reason that they just do not push the right buttons. Nothing wrong with them. Probably very nice people.

    In effect, what you are saying is EVERYBODY IS RACIST!

    If I date my Indonesian girlfriend, I am racist for not dating an African girl. If I date an African girl, I am racist for not dating an English girl.

    What a load of bollocks! I can't damned well win!

  • This is just silly. It's not just silly, it's dumb as fuck.

    Now, not being attracted to a black person, "just using black as an example," may mean you're racist. It may very well be that you do not like blacks. But to say that racial dating preferences are racist, just makes it sound like you are butt hurt because the pretty white girls you want keep not wanting to fuck you.

    Staying with the black and white dynamic here. Are you saying that a white woman, who chooses to teach at school in a predominantly black neighborhood, treats those kids no differently than she would at a school that has all white kids, stands up for those kids and has their backs, is racist because she is sexually attracted to white men only?

  • You say "Race is a social Construct" (which I happen to agree with, by the way). Then you say that anyone whose attraction to others is based on race is racist. Do you see that if race is a social construct, so is being racist? Being "racist" is simply to discriminate against someone based on their race. If race doesn't truly exist, then being racist cannot either. And the word "racist" has taken on such an ugly, knee-jerk reaction effect that it is counter-productive to having intelligent discourse. Let's just use "discrimination." It widens the net, and is just as true:

    Discrimination is the treatment or consideration of, or making a distinction in favor of or against, a person based on the group, class, or category to which the person is perceived to belong rather than on individual attributes. For or against.

    Modern psychology has determined that people in general tend to be attracted to others who are like themselves, with men taller than women. Tend to, but it is not absolute. Sometimes people are attracted specifically to someone because they are different; it makes them interesting, exciting, exotic, whatever. But this is not just for physical appearance, it is for all the types of discrimination.

    To say that everyone of any group, class, or category is the same is an over-generalization, and over-generalizations are hardly ever accurate. However, there might be some commonalities. The culture of the U. S. is very different from the culture of, say, China, or Iran. Most Americans will share cultural norms, and in some ways will be different than all Chinese, or Iranians, who have their own cultures. And each has its own sub-cultures.

    "Race" really used to come from nationalities, where cultures were different. The U. S. was a mix of many immigrants from many places, creating subcultures. These subcultures, "racially" different or not, might have different beliefs, behaviors, and practices. Some could include food choices, personal hygiene practices, clothing choices, all of which could also affect the sense of smell. All these various things could make them more, or less, attractive to others. Differences can be good, or bad.

    And, it is still true that if a "race" has genetics that tend to make the man shorter than the woman, the woman have more masculine features, or eye shape or skin/hair color different, it can affect attraction. Finally, prejudices based on ignorance can hamper attraction. Exposure and knowledge can allow it to flourish.

  • I refuse to believe anyone who says an entire race is physically unattractive, it’s simply untrue and impossible. Which means people associate race very strongly with culture... and having a cultural preference is NOT racist.

    I will not date a Muslim for example because I do not like religion or more specifically their religion. But there are seriously attractive Muslim women out there.

  • What is "genetical". Looks like someone needs to go to school.

    Racial preferences are no different than preferences in height, body type, body shape, education, etc...

    I personally have only dated Asians - being Asian myself.
    I can tell when people of other races are attractive, but I simply don't find them attractive.

    Besides, a person's sexual preference is their own choice, and not to be decided by some stupid child like you.

    You don't even understand the concept of social construct. Money is a social construct. Marriage is a social construct. Race is genetic in nature, and you can determine one's race with a DNA sample alone (if a DNA profile of other races is available for comparison... which there is).

  • You are completely full of shit. Sorry, but you sound like one of those people that try and find racism in anything and everything even though you have never actually experienced it in your life. I only date white women. I don't find any others attractive in a sexual way at all. I have no issue with them as women. I would be friends and have friends of all races. not racist, despite your racist comments.

  • No. Employment is supervised by civil rights laws. It is illegal to discriminate against an employee or potential employee because of their race. There is no legitimate argument to be made for personal preference, or say.. sexual attraction, concerning how people are treated based on race in employment.

    Sexual attraction however cannot be racist, unless it is blatantly caused by a racist attitude or mindset. For example a person who will say something like "I ain't gonna' have sex with a n** no way!" even though they may actually be sexually attracted to black people, would be making a conscious decision to racially discriminate in their sex life.

    If it is unintentional, not at all a choice or a conscious decision, then it is not racist. It is simply a case of someone not finding a certain race attractive. I am very rarely attracted to non-caucasian girls, and I detest racism. MLK jr. is one of my idols. The guy was an absolute inspiration. It so happens though that my sexual preference is a pale skinned lass, with dark hair and blue eyes. Very rarely I may find myself sexually attracted to black girls who have that beautiful chocolate coloured skin (chocolate love), similarly so for latinas and Native Americans. This is very rare occasions that I'm attracted to these races, and never anything else. I am not attracted to Asians at all.

    I am not racist. I have a sexual preference.

  • In my opinion it's not racist. You can't help who you're attracted to and some features are more common among some races than others.

    Broad nose, thick lips and kinky hair is more common among West-Africans than Europeans and blonde hair is more common among North-Europeans than Asians for example.

    It's not true it's only a social construct. It's biologically to have a preference for something which is familiar, but at the same time exotic enough to avoid inbreeding. Familiarity is associated with safety and is an unconscious biologically mechanism. Humans are tribal by nature. Therefor some would prefer some races more than others.

  • All I know is, you can't force people to like you. If they wanna be preferential by the way of actually being racist or by the lack of exposure and understanding, you can't sway someone by saying 'you don't prefer me cause I'm a different shade? You're a racist'. Why do you wanna be with someone who won't even give you a moment to know you? Why do you care so much when they obviously don't?
    Things are the way they are for a reason, we are all guided by our desires and instincts and more often than not its not the object of our desire that hurts us the most, its desire itself that gives us the most hurt. And nobody, absolutely nobody has any obligation to fulfill your desire.

  • I am open to women of a races and ethnicities, but not everyone is. It's no big deal, they just have a different opinion with their preferences. Other preferences can be body type, personality, hobbies, education, etc., and race/ethnicity is just another preference. If a woman isn't interested in me because of my race/ethnicity, I can live with that.

  • I don't know if they are necessarily racist now. They might be weird, nonsensical and stupid. But racist?

    I say this because a lot of folks do not know what race is or how it is actually defined. So I kind of give them the benefit of the doubt. They really do not mean race, they may mean they are not attracted to certain phenotypes.

    There are plenty of "White" women here who may not be attracted to dark skinned men. But maybe they lighter skinned African-Americans are okay. Someone like Jesse Williams.

    Or take for instance, me, I can't say I am attracted to very pale skinned women. I am just not. Now unlike other folks, if I had found a woman who was really special, I would have to look past skin color. I just would find it hypocritical to dismiss a woman who had a personality that I was strongly attracted to.

    But I know all about simply not being attracted to a certain look.

    As for people who actually are trying to use the weird crazed standard of race of deciding attractiveness well. . . okay maybe they are racist.

    But I think the vast majority of folks who talk about racial preferences are just ignorant and really mean skin color or phenotypical traits.

    Get me?

    Jesse Williams. . .100% brother.

    • No skin color bias is more within men. Women aren’t crazed over looks like men are. In Michigan a majority of dark skin black men are with mostly white thicker women here. With children. I rarely see light skin black males with white women unless he’s mix.

      Don’t get how some of the black men that bash they race don’t want black women and look for black women genetic features in white women. That would be bias and colorism and also a dumb ass preference.

      But colorism is mostly place in males. Men are more visual then women

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    • @LoveableBreak And what's wrong with that? Mixed or biracial people can be "Mixed", "Biracial" or "Black". They get to choose.

    • I didn’t say nothing was WRONG with it?

  • I would change your post to say "sexuality is socially driven, and often times due to this, subconscious racist themes make their way into your sexual desires."

    I would not call people individually racist. They don't know anything about genetics or social conditioning. All they know is they like the way one person looks over another. To them, its their preference.

    I'm sure it's very true that racism makes its way into the bedroom subconsciously. That people's "preferences" are really based on a lot of other shit. But people don't like the idea of not being able to make a choice. Even though they say their preference is not a choice, implying it could be a racist thing in your brain you don't know about is hard for people to grapple with.

    So OP, I hope you won't call people racist for being ignorant. It's not racist to have a preference. I'd say preference can be created by racism.

  • Then if you aren't all bisexual, you must be sexist. And if you don't have sex with animals, you are prejudice against animals.
    Such a nonsense opinion. Having preferences isn't racist. I'm not attracted to Asians either, but I am friends with them.
    But when I say I'm not attracted to Blacks, then OH NO! Must be racist if it is anything that doesn't support/favor Blacks.
    This is such BS.

    • Exactly what I was thinking!

      Not everyone is a zoophile or a bisexual, which I'm sure they'd still consider sexist since they tend to believe there are more sexes than 2. They probably want us humping anything that moves, plus plants.

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