At what point does a guy decide to be exclusive with one girl he is seeing?

I've been talking, hanging out and going on dates with this guy since February . We text and snapchat daily with an occasional phone conversation thrown in their too depending on our schedules.

At what point would a guy know or want to be exclusive with someone? He originally told me he wanted to take things slow which we have been. We have gradually progressed with the forms of communication and how frequently we see each other.

Is there a certain thing that happens then the guy knows he wants to be in a relationship with the girl?

I don't want to directly ask him because I know that most guys don't like that particular conversation and I don't want to make things awkward.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Most guys will raise the 'girlfriend'/official question in their own time. However if he hasn't done so yet, that doesn't mean he doesn't see you as being exclusive, it just means he doesn't quite want the commitment.

    Its an odd aspect of the human psyche, we can be perfectly happy doing something but unable to admit to it (in this case, he feels trepidation towards becoming 'official' but likely has no issue acting like it)

    • Yes I agree with everything you said. He has been single for 3 years and I am just newly single as of September. I had been in a 4 year relationship. He told some mutual friends that he wants to make sure that I like him for him and that I am just not trying to get another boyfriend. I've dated other guys since my ex therefore I know what I am looking for and he is the one I want. In the beginning he told me he just wants to take things slow with me and get to know me. We have been. We live 45 minutes away from each other and I see him most weekends but I just want to make sure I'm not wasting my time if he doesn't see it going any where. I wish I could find out someway what he is thinking without directly asking him.

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    • How exactly would I go about putting my foot down without scaring him away or pushing him into something he isn't ready for? Is there a way I could ease into it to make him as a guy more comfortable? Not this weekend but next weekend he is being my date to a wedding that I am the maid of honor in. (my best friends wedding) Therefore, i don't think a guy would agree to going if he wasn't at least somewhat serious about me. Plus a lot of people will be there from our hometowns so we will be seen together in a public setting where people will more than likely assume we are a couple.

    • From the sounds of things you are a couple, there just hasn't been a 'formal agreement' on the matter.

      Whenever you decide to raise the idea of making things official do it when you're alone and its just the two of you. Before the wedding would be good, you could just simply say in a light-hearted manner: "So see when we're meeting people I know at the wedding, should I introduce you as my boyfriend?"

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What Guys Said 1

  • you have been hanging out with and him talking with him for almost 3 months now. if he wanted something more you would know by now

    • Well it has gradually progressed over the time range given. In February we would talk every 4 days or so then it progressed into daily convos. From group hangouts to dates etc. He told me he wanted to take it slow which we have been.

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    • As far as I know he doesn't have any other girls that he is seeing so maybe he already is exclusive? I don't know for sure. He seems to be worried when i go out with my girlfriends since guys hit on me all the time. I just wish I knew how to find out what he is thinking without scaring him or making him feel cornered.

    • the only way to know for sure is to lay out your cards on the table and see what happens

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