Am I expecting too much out of the dating scene?

I went home with a girl one night. In the morning we exchanged numbers. We went out two more times. It was so hard to get a hold of her. She wouldn't reply to texts for days, so after about a month of dating, I just texted her say I like her, and I don't hear from her enough. Then she ends it.

Now my friends girlfriend just gave me her friends number. I text her. We have a little bit of back and forth. Day two she asks me what I do for a living. I tell her. Day three she asks me the exact same question. I answer again. I text her something. No reply. So I'm thinking I wanna get this over with. I don't want to keep texting someone back and forth for weeks before meeting them. So I send out a third text asking her out. This gets her attention and she responds. Agrees to see me sometime next week. To me, this is really annoying. I don't want to be texting some strange girl for two weeks before I meet her. We basically know nothing about each other, and my attitude is to find out soon, rather than keep this pointless texting up (which she isn't paying attention to - repeating the same question, taking a long time to respond).

Am I being too demanding here? I thought generally, if you were potentially interested in someone, you would get back to them in 24 hours?
Also, if you're being set up with someone, don't you want to meet them sooner rather than later? I don't know, sort of get it out of the way and see if you like each other rather than text for weeks, meet and decide you don't like each other.


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What Girls Said 2

  • ..Eh.. what reason does she have to initially be interested? Her friend gave some guy her number, right? I wouldn't be very interested initially either, unless I knew the dude and I'd already expressed interest in him to someone. I agree with the sooner rather than later, but some people are apprehensive.

    Dating is exhausting, however. I will definitely agree.

    • Well, I really don't have any reason to be interested either. I just wanna get things moving here. For me, writing texts to strangers is weird, so I want to get the meeting in person done soon. If she's not interested, then she shouldn't have agreed to have her friend give me her number. I don't want to waste my time on someone who doesn't give a shit.

  • i'm usually the 'the sooner i know, the better' type, but not all of us (men or women) are like that, and not always, for many reasons. sometimes you could have some flirt game going on already, so this new potential date technically comes 'second' if that main game fails. some others are just not that mentally open to give it a try even with random strangers. it's just a matter of meeting a lot of people, until you find the person you like. and by the way, no reply in 24hrs means 'i'm not interested', unless they're playing some weird childish games thinking that makes them interesting. i do personally get often easily bored.

    • I would normally agree with your "not replying in 24 hours means you're not interested". But there was this girl I dated last summer who was like that, then would show up randomly at my door to have sex all the time. Also the last girl I dated was the same way, but in person, she was always kissy and wanted to snuggle. So I don't know if the 24hr means "not interested", it could just mean they're rude people.

    • you're probably sending 'impatience' vibes, meaning all you're after is sex and women just sense that. the ones who're ok with that, will even occasionally turn up for it (as you said it happened). mind you, in the beginning is quite normal not wanting to show you're 'too keen', so that's why they're taking ages to reply, everyone pretending they're busy w some epic task. then obviously, until you meet the person, you don't know if you're 'interested' or not. someone asked a question in here about 'playing hard to get', pretty much sums it up.

    • I guess, I didn't know texting someone 48 hours later was seen as impatient. I really don't get this whole texting scene.

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