Will going into no contact for 30+ days get her to talk to me again?

So this girl and I have been rather close friends for several months. We've dated, slept together, all night chats and everything like a gf/bf except we're not gf/bf lol.

we got into an argument and she went completely cold for 2weeks (no talking at all) she restricted her fb from me even though we're still friends. she said she did this because she needs to focus on her career (she works 7am-11pm almsot everyday) and that i was disturbing her (with arguments). WHAT lol

after the 2wks i talked to her but she seemed less chatty and busy with work apparently. sometimes not replying at all.

i went no contact for about a month as my female friends advised me to. i initiated contact again after that but she seems either not chatty or not reply at all again

so should i just not contact her at all for now? like for longer period? wait for her to contact me?

all of my female friends suggests that i dont contact her as she maybe really busy with work, needs time for herself, not ready for commitments yet (according to her younger sister)

tbh i don't want to lose her. we had good times together and i thought she liked me! lol. i don't wanna be the one that keeps contacting her as it may seem needy.

and about no contact. do i still wish her on special occasions/holidays? (newyears etc?) i'm treating this as a breakup as we used to be 'lovers' lol


Most Helpful Girl

  • No contact only works if she still had feelings for you and you didn't do any irreparable damage. Those arguments clearly bothered her, and I can speak from experience, are a real distraction from everyday life.

    I just had a similar experience with a "friend" who was going to turn into something more. We got into an argument that lasted over a day, and it was so distracting (and a turn off) that I had to cut contact because I couldn't focus on school. He's sort of gone no contact on me now, but it's been a relief.

    Maybe if you give her more space and try again much later (like a month) you can see what happens, but more than anything she feels annoyed that the argument took place. Have you tried apologizing for it yet? Or are you trying to pretend like it never happened?

    • yeah I've apologized for it. she said she's not mad at me and her not talking much is just her being busy with work (tho she might just be saying that). should i just not talk to her anymore? feel like i'm just wasting my time trying to contact her

    • Show All
    • so there's no way of getting her back?

    • Only she knows that, I couldn't tell you. All I can do is give advice based on her actions so far, and so far she seems to be pulling back regardless of what you try.

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What Girls Said 3

  • She might appear less chatty even if she likes you a lot. But don't be fooled by her facade. She might still like you but she feels like you aren't doing enough to keep her interested. You doing the no contact shows you don't care as much because if you can go on days without checking up on her, she can too. WITHOUT YOU

  • It could either make her miss you or show her it's easy to live without you.

  • No it won't work
    Because she has no interest in you. She will only welcome the silence


What Guys Said 1

  • Personally this stupid games we keep playing with each other are getting on my nerves. First there's an argument then one person doesn't talk then the other one goes cold turkey and the first get's worried when it's completely obvious that both of them care about each other because without caring for each other there can be no argument to set things off. But the problem is our prides get hurt and when we see the other person trying we get ticked off because they're trying now when before they weren't or we get angry because they aren't trying but in the end it's just a bunch of BS.
    I've got the exact same situation as you. We dated she told me she loved me and she wanted to be with me then all of a sudden got cold feet was really mean to me when I tried to talk things out now she's trying to come back and I can't seem to let her. How it will turn out I don't know but I hope me and her end up together but that would mean that eventually we'd need to talk to each other get closer again and stuff.
    So don't wait too long but on the other hand you don't lose anything by playing cold turkey for a while but it only works if she gets worried. Once she starts talking to you sooner before later you have to talk to her. I told mine that if she wanted to get back into my life it's all or nothing otherwise don't come back. Now I have to see if she's serious.

    • No matter how worried I get with you or how I still have feelings for you or I haven't moved on, even if we had a past together, if I feel like I am losing you slowly because you gone cold with me or not talking to me for days, I will be strong enough to walk away if I feel I am no longer a priority in your life.