Why do so many girls or people in general think, believe we guys have the upper hand in dating and relationships, have it easier because we have to?

approach, ask out, initiate, escalate, take the lead, etc? Seriously, how does approaching and asking out, courting, escalating, initiating, whatever the fuck you want to call it, give you so called power? how does the give you power?

Honestly i hate whenever people argue and say us guys have it easier because of this, because if it was truly easier for us guys because of this card, role we were dealt with, there would be less male virgins out there than the number of it there are, there would not be as much, or maybe no guys at all being frustrated and ranting about on this site about how they are still expected to approach and take the lead, etc.

Girls have the power to say Yes or No, they ultimately have the final say, especially initially, girls decide, not guys, on whether or not sex is gonna happen for the first time between the two usually, they always call it "taking charge, taking control", but last time i checked, girls control the outcome, not guys.

Whenever there is a debate or argument about who has it easier, they always say "for every girl that has a boyfriend that guy has a girlfriend" Ya but the guy had to do the work in order to make it happen, and in order to make it happen or make something happen, it requires knowing how in order to get the outcome you want.

The long and short of it, is that, for guys it's literally a matter of knowing how to get a girlfriend, for girls, it's not a matter of knowing how to get a boyfriend, girls don't need to know how to get a boyfriend, it just happens like a "puff!!" out of thin air for them, it literally just comes to them.

Yes guys with the role they are given means they literally go after what they want, and they say guys get to go after what they want and when they want, but i disagree with when they want because guys have to do a lot of self improvement or changes about themselves, in their life if they want to get a girlfriend, so no, it's like they have to put dating on hold somewhat.


Most Helpful Girl

  • See, you just answered your own question. Guys have power when actually approaching a girl. Girls are shy. We typically wait for you to say something. Though I don't follow the rules :) but girls have the power into saying yes or no like you said. Rejection is a powerful thing both guys and girls have in their hand. I feel like they're both powerful when it comes to certain things. So in the end it all balances. But honestly, it depends on the girls and guys you meet. Because I always feel like if I make the approach, or take the lead, etc. that guys will feel like I'm "stealing their thunder" because that's what the boyfriend is suppose to do.


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What Girls Said 2

  • I actually think attractive people have it easier, and it doesn't have to do with gender. In a relationship that is already formed, I think girls have it easier and agree on you with that. I gotta say, though, your anger and attitude is terrible. And if this is your mindset when approaching a woman, it's a wonder that you've ever even talked to a girl. It's borderline scary.

  • I think girls have more power in attracting and the approach but guys have more power when actually dating.


What Guys Said 2

  • because society usually supports and comforts women in peril

  • Because guys do have the power.

    Girls are like flowers in a garden. They strive to look pretty enough to be picked. But they are incapable of doing the choosing themselves. (Too scared, for the most part.)

    The only person who has the power to choose, is the guy,

    Now, like any relationship, it will have to be a two-way street to work. She will have to say yes, to his approach.

    But he is the only one with the power to do the approaching. That is a power that women lack.

    Your inability to grasp this fact, does not alter it.

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