Online senior dating, both 55?

I met this very attractive gal on a online dating site. Very attracted to her and quite interested but don't want to scare her away, while also letting her know that I am very interested. I give her compliments often. We met for conversation one time. We talked and talked for 90 minutes on the date. Was great. I've made contact since then, but it is always text. We have actually been in contact everyday since then, except one day. I have tried to call her. She has not answered. She has a very busy life. Working 2 jobs and then likes to spend time with her grandchildren. She always responds to my contact but never more than one or 2 lines. We've been talking back and forth for about 3 weeks. I asked her out to a concert but she declined saying she wanted to know more about me first. How do we get to know each other? She, so far, has not made much time. I have a tendency to want to move fast but I also seldom do because I know it scares the girl. I am very sensitive to what girls think and I want to win her over. Just not sure what she is thinking. She has been divorced for 23 years and has been in at least 2 other semi long term relationships since then. I am probably over thinking things but she has not said anything personal to me other than one time, when we initially met at the in-person get together. It is always very short. I tested her yesterday when I wrote her after no contact for a day and told her I was thinking of her and asked if she was thinking of me. No response to that question but there was some short response to the rest of my message. So girls, what is she thinking. What is she saying by only speaking to me one time during the day, after I initiate, and comes back with one sentence. We do have another get together scheduled this weekend. I just can't tell if she is just still talking to me because it is something to do while she waits to meet someone else more to her liking or if she really is interested.

rthomas. So far this is really the only way she is communicating. Via texts or short emails through the dating site.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I honestly just know that older women are not really into the whole "I was thinking of you," bullshit. Don't be all aloof and romantic, be more practical with your approach. She's been through her whole life dealing with all of that gooey nonsense. My guess now she just want's someone to talk to while she's getting the groceries or someone to go see a Museum with.

    So be less clingy, be more straightforward. Keep your messages shorter, less cotton candy if you get what I'm saying. Of course I'm not saying be an arrogant dick, still say nice things to her, but don't go on about how she makes the sun shine like you were 16 years old.

    Say something like "I'm going to be in town for the weekend, I know this great little spot (fill in the blank), would you like to get dinner?"

    Don't spam her with messages.


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What Girls Said 2

  • not everyone is into heavy texting. it may not be personal. maybe lay off a bit for a few days on contacting her and see if she does more communicating. i know when i get excessive texts after a date, even when i left the date interested, it has turned me off

    • That's what I have been thinking.

    • i should add i am divorced and a busy mom, 42yo, so after a date a lot of texts make me feel like they have nothing better to do and i can't keep up with replying to them all. my dating habits are nothing like they were when i was younger without kids.

  • Kind of hard to tell considering her age. Two options. Either she is taking it slow or she's not into you.

    • Well I think she is at least curious because she has agreed to get together again and has not cancelled. I just can't tell "HOW" interested she is. Perhaps she is keeping a distance, going super slow, but is intrigued? Just can't tell how the female mind works LOL.

What Guys Said 1

  • I say wait until after the second date to jump to any conclusions. You can't assume her short texts are a sign of her not being into you, most older folk aren't huge fans of communicating that way.

    • rthomas. So far this is really the only way she is communicating. Via texts or short emails through the dating site.