Well my name is Ashley. I used to be a really religious, happy go lucky girl but the more I started dating and the more pain I experienced from the relationships the more heart broken I became and now I don't even recognize myself from the person I was 2 years or even 1 year ago. I have become more angry sometimes and sometimes pretty sad? I even get thoughts about cutting myself time to time when I really hit low points. But luckily I haven't done that yet even though I've been tempted to. I want to get my life on track I want to be happy again and I do think if I can become happy again maybe I can meet the guy of my dreams?
Anyways a backdrop of my story was I started dating a bunch of guys and I always liked them more then they liked me and a majority of them always ended up leaving me. Well the last straw hit when I met this cute, nice guy. I thought God answered my prayers because this guy was also religious and he had a sweet fun personality. When I met him I was instantly attracted to him it even kinda took me by surprise since his online photos didn't really capture how cute he was. And I was kinda sexual at that time so I was flirting with him in a cute innocent way and the first day we met was good but he cut me off due to me being way too sexual he said it was for religious reasons but I later found out that he had a girlfriend or something? Not sure. The second time we met he touched my boobs lol and I got even more sexual with him and he apologized and said he had to cut me out of his life. That hurt me the most. And he hasn't talked to me since? I think I am taking this way too far and I'm making a big deal out of it than what it really is. I tend to do that but I want to get my life on track. I want to meet a nice guy around my age who won't leave me but it seems so hard?
I do want to fix my life, get it all on track and become happy again. Does anybody have any advice for me? I know this sounds stupid asking but any advice would be good :)
Most Helpful Guy
It isn't stupid, Ashleymaries (I have a niece named Ashley... I love that name).
Well, I think you've got to understand that most attempts at romance end in failure. Most requests for a date meet with a "no." Most first dates don't lead to second dates. Most second dates don't lead to relationships. The difference between really great people and people who aren't so great is that the really great ones get back up when they've fallen. Churchill failed to get into Sandhurst. Grant's first encounter with Lee was a defeat. And so on. So truly great people fail, but THEY SHOULDER ON, my dear.
Now, Ashleymaries, I think you should ask yourself what are you doing to make yourself a great gal? What's going on in your young life right now? Are you in college? Are you working? What kind of activities are you doing? Are you making yourself physically and emotionally attractive to someone? Are you making your life fun and adventurous? I think when you start to work on these things, then you'll get rid of those thoughts that are clouding you with anger and you won't want to hurt yourself. I rather suspect that the guys you've dated sense some frustration and impatience in you, and that's a turn off.
Now about praying to God. Ashleymaries, I've noticed some very disciplined and great people pray to God. It provides focus in their lives and I say good for them! However, those very disciplined and great people I know who pray to God do NOT think of him like Santa Claus. They don't ask, "God, please send me a boyfriend or girlfriend." If you believe in God (I don't but I respect that you do), then you can look to atheists who have found love as evidence that God isn't a matchmaker. God provides you with certain attributes and it's up to you to use them as best as you can. You take care now. Message me if you like.1