Should I go on a date with this guy?

I started talking with him a few months ago. I never dated any guy before even if I am 21. This guy seems really smart, he is studying for his masters degree and also working as an engineer. So far our discussions online are interesting so I never get bored while talking to him. He REALLY shows me how interested he is, he is very understanding and has a cute face.

Here comes the problem. I always told myself that dating will never be for me. My plans on having a boyfriend were nonexistent.
In my opinion, having a relationship, while having 0 experience would be a lot of burden and I would most likely suffer a lot and be really immature while in a relationship, so I would rather not do that.
His personality tho, makes me question my previous thoughts regardless relationships.

Because I decided not to focus on meeting guys, I focused on my studying. In September I will take some training lessons in another country and right after that, because I applied and I was accepted, I will be an exchange student in another country for 5 months, that means that I will be outside my country for half a year. Not to say that I already planned to get an Internship abroad during next summer holiday, so I would be only for a few months in my country.

I don't want to hurt his feelings. The idea of going on a first date, seems quite exciting. If I would decide to go on a date, would it be selfish for me to hope that he will hate my guts and not ask for another date? (because that's exactly how I feel). I am honestly very confused. He insisted and waited for me to go on a date with him for so many months so he seems very serious, yet I don't want to create more drama if something happens because I will be out of the country.

To be honest, it seems pointless to me. Yet I somewhat feel like I should give him a chance. What should I do?

Thanks everyone who took the time to read everything! :D


Most Helpful Guy

  • I say go on the date and see what happens. This guy seems like a great guy and in today's society, that is saying a lot. He wants to better himself by studying and working at the same time. That honestly takes a lot. However, I'm confused that you said you aren't into dating yet you are talking to him online? Does this mean you found him on an online dating website? Either way, you seem like an intelligent girl so you not ever being in a relationship is not going to hinder you trust me. Maturity is maturity. You don't need experience in being a relationship you just need common sense.

    • Thank you for your advice and kind words! :D Actually, I met this guy on one of my University parties but when the party was almost over, so we told each other just a few words. Because of that, he added me on Facebook. At first I wanted to ignore him because I thought that he was not serious, but he sent me a long message right when he added me and I was impressed so I started talking to him more often. I will follow your advice and go on a date with him ^^ Thanks again!

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    • I only ask because I have always wondered if meeting a girl briefly and then adding her on Facebook followed by messaging her about hanging would creep the girl out or actually work. I would ask you more about this considering I'm hoping to be in a similar situation, but I don't want to bore you anymore. Good luck with him.

    • Oh, I understand. Well, let me tell you something. Whenever you hear stuff like "don't show her that you like her, be cool, play hot and cold" it applies only to immature people. I'm sure that your girl would not be creeped out. Creepy would be having a vulgar language or telling her right away that you want to marry her and have her babies. If you are sincere about your feelings with her, she would most likely will appreciate it. Creepy would be a guy who only cares about bangin' girls and has no motivation to care about other stuff in his life. Not a super friendly message on facebook. Don't worry, you don't bore me at all! The conversation is enjoyable, so feel free to message me anytime :D. Thanks! Good luck with your girl as well!

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • Tell him that. If he still wants to meet you after knowing you are going out of the country go. If you never want to date or have a boyfriend, which it kind of sounded like, then why are you asking?