With the belief that a relationship may evolve, should I steal her man?

Hello, I'm new here. This is conflicting topic for me and I'll like to hear from people point of view respectfully.
So here it goes, I'm very family orientated, along with many hardships along the way. The result from this I have not had a boyfriend. The opportunity was there from school years, but they were not gentlemen or close to it.
Now after thinking I'm doomed of ever having one, I found that some-one at church of all places.
I am not religious, just to be clear.
As the title suggest he has a girlfriend, despite him exchanges eye contact with me with interest, and he seems to have difficulty to talk to me, unlike with others.
The thing is I am doing volunteering with his mother's corporation, so I know his family really well and vice-versa. Luckily not his girlfriend, because that would be terrifying haha.
We never formally talked or anything, primarily because we don't have the chance, but there seem to be chemistry.
However, because I've been invited to the family's lunch for the corporation they put me with my crush table.
We do have things in common, I never saw his girlfriend anywhere and she is not going to this lunch on Saturday.
I am 18 and he is 21 so its not like I'm wrecking others lives except the girl involved.
I know there this is morally wrong, but if he truly loves her then he shouldn't have been acting shy around me. I'm expecting the worse and hoping the best.
I am going to try to know him more on a classy level, I won't force myself on him.
My heart's desire is very strong, I rarely misinterpret people but this is really a leap of faith.
What do you think?, should i go for it?

We made a decision...


Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes go for it :) you never know unless you try

    • did you not read that the guy is already taken

    • Show All
    • A person who helps someone cheat is worse then the actual cheater. And the cheater is a lousy piece of garbage. My guess with that answer is you have had plenty of experience cheating. it is just disgusting.

    • Don't waste your time godfatherfan, it's the type of asker which would not change her mind no matter what you say. She seems to have only MHO this opinion because it was most in line with what she thought already prior to this question being asked.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 4

  • here's something to think about: Your crush has a gf and he is making goo goo eyes at you. What makes you think you are so special that he won't do that to you. If he has half a lick of sense, he would break up with his gf, then go about dating. Not date til he finds someone else.

    You are setting yourself up. This isn't a leap of faith, this is train wreck waiting to happen. Anyone encouraging you to go after someone else's boyfriend really really has some problems of their own..

    • Its not a date, nothing has been finalised. I am treading lightly with my decision. At least I go forth knowing the best and worst case scenarios. How is discouraging different from encouraging is having problems?

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    • Anyone encouraging you go after some-one else's boyfriend really has problems of their own, so I am thinking the opposite. I believe most commentators just went on here because they got hurt in a relationship or they wish they could be more risky in life, but the results are not there for them.
      I feel mostly enraged by the boys' comments. If a man was to steal would that be fine? I'm sure that if there was a similar post from a male perspective he would not get this much backlash.
      I will certaintly give an update of whatever way it goes, but in the meantime I'm not going to read any more pettitness and I will explore more on this site, a great welcome to a newcomer.

    • Im not one of those who was hurt, Im just looking at it from the other girls perspective. If you steal her bf how will that make her feel. Also if her bf is not committed to their relationship then what makes you think he will be committed to you. If he is always looking then he will continue to look. Its a pattern and its not a good one. Im trying to keep you from getting hurt, and avoid getting into a bad situation. I do agree some people on here are reacting due to their own experiences. But Im not attacking like some.

  • A person who helps someone cheat is worse then the actual cheater. And the cheater is a lousy piece of garbage.
    there is nothing worse then a cheater.
    There is nothing wrong with with letting him know how you feel. Once he knows then he can make a decision to stay with the person he is with our go with you. If he is a true man he will break up with her before he does anything with you. If he doesn't then how are you ever going to trust he won't cheat on you? once a cheater, always a cheater.

  • Sure you can steal this guy away from his girlfriend, but who is to say that this won't happen to you with this guy in the future?

    Short-term thinking will get you nowhere in life.

    • Has long-term thinking worked out for you?

    • It's worked out really well. I would never be so foolish as to steal another man's girlfriend while naively believing that the girl won't ditch me for someone else further down the line.

      I think with my brain cells and not my genitalia.

    • This is one way to be accepted in this community. I simply asked people point of view respectfully but obviously you love being in the comfort zone, if not already, insulting people won't get you nowhere in life.

  • Read the last three words in your question over and over again, and think about the implications.
    If he'd go for it, can he be really trusted if he abandons his current relationship?
    If he doesn't go for it, then it was a waste of effort and a potential way of ruining your relation with him in general.

    I personally vote for no.

    • I think reading the questions again is not going to change my decision :)
      I am expecting the best and the worst. If it wasn't to go how I picture it I will haveto rebuild my status again, but if there is a spark then I will haveto deal with the title and so forth.
      At the moment this is early stage, so I won't make things obvious. Even though you disagree thanks for the comment.

What Girls Said 4

  • I don't think people are property
    You can't steal someone that never belonged to you to begin with
    I think it's pathetic and immature and makes you look cheap to go after someone who is taken rather than a single guy

    • And you are pathetic question asker
      You are too sensitive
      Did you come here to attack everyone who doesn't agree with you and whine like a baby? Who cares if you are a new user
      This is the internet if you don't like different opinions find a different website to troll on

  • Let him decide and think on his own.

  • You should never try and steal anyone from another person. It's wrong