Girls: If you didn't like a guy that you have had messed around with, would you continue to see him?

I've gone out with this girl a few times and we kissed a few times. She recently told me she had been seeing someone else but they were on a break. When I asked her what her feelings are for me she said she had feelings for me, but wanted to see where things were going with the other guy since she was seeing him first. I backed off for a few weeks and then today I was texting with her and asked her to do something with me and she said yes. Would you do that if you didn't see any potential there? I wouldn't. I would just say no I don't think it would be right for us to hang out. But I'm a guy and we think differently. What would you do in this situation ladies?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I am on the same situation! I have a boyfriend but we broke up so I started to meet new people and I met a guy. My ex wants to be with me so badly but I am still in touch with the other guy. In my opinion she is playing the safe side who ever wins takes the girl. She know the guy before you but she met you so she is afraid to risk it! If she stays with you and you turn out to be a dick she gonna feel like shit and loose the other guy but if she stays with the guy but goes out with you it means she is playing it safe! If you really like her you can win her in a heart beat! Just make her feel safe and let her know that she is the one so she can make a good decision! Good luck!

    • I don't think playing it safe is chasing a guy who still lives with his ex. I think she met him and fell for him, and even though she likes me, she is curious to see where the other situation will go. I'm pretty sure it's not going anywhere since they never even were boyfriend/girlfriend. They saw each other for maybe a month tops and then took a break so he could figure his stuff out. His ex keeps pushing back her move out date I guess. I don't know, I see this as fair game. It's not like I'm home wrecking anything. They've been on a break longer than they were ever together. I do want to do what is right by her because I do really like/care for her. If I thought it was the right thing to do to just walk away for her, I would. As hard as it would be.

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    • By the way I was just reading through your original comment again and you think it's definitely possible for me to get her to switch? All you think I have to do is make her feel safe? Like physically safe, or emotionally safe or both? Not 100% sure what you meant by that and since I'm seeing her this week, I'd like to figure out how to do that.

    • So one other question for you. Since I have already told her I have feelings for her, don't you think that telling her she is "the one" might freak her out? I have plans to see her this week and I'm just trying to figure out if I should play it cool and just have fun with her, or if I should remind her that I still have feelings for her and still want to see her on more than a friendship level. I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable, but at the same time, I really, really like her and want to "win" the girl's heart. Just don't want to mess it up.

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What Girls Said 3

  • Really I think you should letbthe girl go. A break doesn't mean they broke up it just means they aren't talking. This has the potential ofbthem getting bak together. So you should wait until she's figured it put herself make sure she isn't messing with another guy while doing the same with you. This could hurt you and her both she would be looked at differently and you would feel used

    • Here's the thing. I don't have any intentions of having a physical relationship with her at this point, and I highly doubt she is either. She had only been seeing that other guy for like three weeks before they took a break. They've been on a break longer than they've even been together!!! I see what you're saying, and I have backed off drastically, but I don't want to disappear either. I thought something fun to do together only not like a "couply" thing would be good. Does that change your view at all or do you think I should still beat feet it outta there?

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    • Nevermind what are you going to do?

    • I'm going to make the next mistake in my life and probably see her next week. I might not though. I don't know. I like her a lot so I probably shouldn't, but it's like a train wreck. You shouldn't watch but for some reason you can't stop looking. I'm going to protect myself with it though and just enjoy the day. Not worry about where anything is going. That's how we had fun together in the first place.

  • She's probably not going to respect you in a potential relationship as you're letting her have her cake and eat it too

    • I didn't really think I am because I haven't seen her in about 2-3 weeks. I have been backing off and letting her figure out what she wanted to do while going out with other girls. But, I thought it would be good to see her so I stay in the picture. The other situation is not a good one, I promise you that!! Plus she and that guy were seeing each other for like three weeks before they had to take a break. I don't even feel bad about that. Not a very good indicator of things to come in my opinion.

  • No I wouldn't but I might not be qualified to answer this question because when I did breaks with my ex-boyfriend I didn't mess around with other guys because I was afraid that when he came back and found out, he would not want to get back together.

    • This isn't her boyfriend but a guy she had been seeing for a few weeks. If it was her boyfriend I would have enjoyed the few days and I'd be out!!

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