Why are men my age still afraid of rejection? Told a guy I've been flirting with to just wish on a star for what he wants (just the flow of the conversation) and he sent a winky face? What is that supposed to mean? My friends and my adult daughter say he was hinting he wants me but really? Why doesn't he just say that? I'm a divorced woman and these games seem ridiculous. Why can't middle aged men put fear of rejection behind and just say what they mean. It's frustrating. What is he trying to say?
Most Helpful Guy
As a middle aged man, I'm not afraid of rejection any more. But.. in my experience, women do not like it when a guy is that forward.
I can still remember the first time I saw the movie Tootsie, and Jessica Lange remarks when drunk that she would really like it if a man just came up and said he liked her and wanted to make love to her, no bullshit. So Dustin Hoffman does that, and she throws a drink in his face. (Brilliant movie, but confused me at a young age.)
You might think you want directness, but a life times experience tells guys in our middle age that women don't know what they want.
As a middle aged guy, I'll tell you what I've found to be true regarding what women want - they want a bit of mystery, they want something to talk to their girlfriends about, they want the thrill of guess work and they want to think about the possibility of what's inside the present before they rip open the wrapping paper.
I find that by being fairly direct but not too direct, I make middle-aged women feel great about flirting with me and it almost always leads somewhere good. But not too quickly. And with those sorts of successes behind me, why would I do anything differently with the next woman, no matter what she claims she wants?2