I'd like to go on dates but I'm really timid when it comes to online dating. How can I do this?

I'm feeling ready to date, at least casually, nothing serious, not sleeping with anyone, just going out. I really have no way to meet people in my daily life, though.

I have "plenty of fish" but I don't have a pic up, and to be honest I don't think it is a great site, at least not the type of guys I'm finding... Kinda sleazy, can tell they are looking to sleep around by what they're saying. I'd like to try a paid one as I wonder if the people on it may be more what I'm looking for if they're willing to pay to use the site. Not sure what one to use, though. I've tried trials but there's even less to choose from.

Also, I've been messaged but I'm way too timid to reply. And I must admit, I've never really felt intrigued to reply. Sort of feel like I get the vibe that I've gotten a copy/paste message or something.

Just not sure online dating is even more me, then. If I can't imagine replying, regardless of feeling timid.

Can anyone relate?


Most Helpful Guy

  • well dear anonymous... Hmmmm I think we may have already found a clue.

    if I may be so bold?
    let's assess the situation in an analogy

    it seems to me that you're a scared little rabbit in the woods shivering under a bush... every little sound you hear is a big bad wolf coming to snatch you up.
    Oh but wait; just 10 feet away there's a carrot... you really want that carrot but you're afraid to leave the safety of your comfort zone to get it... you have to take a chance. Not every guy is a wolf in sheep's clothing. yes they are out there but you can't let that rule your life.

    ok let's say hypothetically you came out from under your bush and went after the carrot... ok be on your guard watch for wolves it's the smart thing to do. now you're close enough to get the carrot... But wait... OMG!! you suddenly realize wow I'm right next to a carrot patch. I don't have to settle for the first carrot I come across there are literally thousands of carrots to choose from. inspect each one ;is it mature or does it still need to grow. choose the one that suits you best.

    if you use a date site be specific write in your profile exactly what you want. find someone with similar interests. make sure that they understand you don't want sex right away. you'll be surprised as to how many people feel the same way you do.
    some of the longest lasting and passionate relationships begin as friends so take a chance you just never know

    Best of luck to you... just a click away!


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What Guys Said 2

  • " I've been messaged but I'm way too timid to reply"

    You won't have success being to timid to reply to someone.

    These dating sites like POF and OK Cupid is more about just seeing what is out there, than actual dating. I have tried both sites and I often found myself wondering why most girls don't reply when I can see on there profile we have a ton of similar interests. I eventually meet my current girlfriend on POF. But the way I see it is at least for guys you have to have thick skin and be used to girls never responding to you. Eventually it drives a lot of people away that are serious because they feel like it's a waste of time, leaving mostly guys looking for sex.

  • When first tried online dating... i felt like i was being mean if i didn't respond to every chat request or message... but now im very selective about who i respond to... have you tried ZOOSK? Its not yhe best but even without an active account you can search any zip code with any distance just to see whose around.


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