Is it unreasonable to ask a girl you like to take a chance on you if you haven't acquired all her desired skills?

I had some major setbacks in life when I was young and I have some limiting beliefs. Approach anxiety for instance. I feel any weakness is not acceptable for a women. I feel that I am not really important.
I feel I was not accepted before, but now I'm worth something. Now how can I get over the fact that I was that weak guy before who was shunned and now people who would have shunned me like me, but I am still that same man, just more confident. Now I remember all the people who shunned me before - now they like me and I hate those types of people who shunned me.

I'm willing to put up with real weaknesses in a woman and others as long as they don't attack me and they strive to be better. But I feel like I'm unwanted If I am not totally confident in myself.

In short my confidence is there, but is reliant on being accepted. I feel I can't be confident If I can't be accepted for my weaknesses and if I was accepted for my weaknesses I would instantly rise above my weaknesses.

I'm not just talking about women but everyone.

Am I confused?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I understand but you have to trust first. Not everyone have the mind set of the people in your child hood, then state your claim. . explain your story be you! They don't like it,.. it their loss

    • but i was conditioned to not be me. cus being confident made everyone insecure. thats why i ask if its unreasonable to ask that a girl accept me first even though im not apparently confident so, i can be confident. because when i was young being confident led to my parents terrorizing me and people hating me.

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    • I think giving a chance anyone could understand, but only giving a chance to know the real you. Not the front you put up, then expected someone to accept someone other than who you presented your self as in order to she lid yourself. People are either gonna accept you or reject no matter the confidence or lack thereof. You won't be able to please everyone, that's why I stress the no judgement rule I have in my life.. I stress that to everyone, and living by that rule I've learnt to never judge a book by its cover, and not everything is always what it seems. I respect and have patience for a lot there's a lot I consider with individuals, first accepting we are all different. And the people I hold dear to my life I handle with such care because I know thy fears and likes and dislikes and we all handle thing differently, have different views and different roads we take. But it's accepting an the individual owning up to who they are, I think that's where the acceptance come in

    • Also keep in mind, you might view yourself as weak, because of your past, but.. In that you've shown strength, and learnt how to maneuver life and in that you've showed persistent when you could of gave up like others I say that to say you might see yourself as weak but some people might genuinely view you the way you want to be seen and not the weak individual you think you are.
      I know it seems like a lot of pressure and maybe you need a shoulder to rely on and be yourself around. And maybe even just someone to tell you it's okay every now and again, but that hardly ever well to me would view you as being afraid or weak. And if your in a relationship most women welcome a man to be them at home.. I don't know I tend to baby my man. Cause I know how hard it is. So I'd let him cry and I won't ever ridicule him for his fears ever!.

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What Girls Said 1

  • I'm confused reading the question

    • Do you prefer men with beards or not? And why?

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    • I don't know never dated be edn asked out but if it looks good on him then yes if not nope

    • I agree don't care what others think if you're comfortable in your own skin

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