Should I put her birthday gift on her doorstep? she's so flaky?

I don't get this girl:
-Initially liked me, but now needs time to herself because she's suffering with extreme depression and alcoholism. She's getting professional help tho!
-So flaky with hanging out, always says "maybe" or "We'll see" to hanging out
-We had a lot of fun the first time we hung out, but she admitted the only reason she met up with me was because she was drinking (she's extremely shy according to her)
-Havent seen her in 3 weeks cause of her flakyness and "maybes"
-Sometimes i feel im just being too inpatient and should let her control how this all goes

Anyway all i'm trying to do is give her her birthday gift (which finally arrived in the mail yesterday). I'm a couple days past her birthday but she doesn't mind. All I told her is i'd like to see her for FIVE minutes... but again she's giving excuses and blabla

I don't get her deal and i'm kinda frustrated with her flakyness. The only thing i can think of is she once said to me "I feel awkward about hanging out with you again. You know im trying to be single and dont want to develop feelings for anyone right now while i get help". But it's just 5 minutes out of her day and it's not a date..

What do i do? i was thinking of just leaving it on her doorstep or something. she lives with her parents btw. im not sure if its creepy to leave a gift at her door step.

  • put it on her doorstep
    Vote A
  • wait till she meets up with you for it
    Vote B
  • other (post what)
    Vote C
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Most Helpful Guy

  • Return the gift and move on. A flake like that ain't worth your time for all the frustration she's going to cause.

    • the hard part is... this girl has literally never lied to me... ever. she tells me she's hesitent to hang cause she just wants to get better right now and not develop feelings.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Just show up when you know she's home.

    • Lol thats creepy, i can't do that... at least not unannounced.

      What if i ask to come over and she makes an excuse? should i just drop it off and go?

    • Show All
    • completely honest how so? like what should i straight up ask her?

    • Ask her if you're just a texting buddy. Be like "Okay, we've been talking for awhile now and every time I ask to hang out you shoot it down. I know you say you're shy and all, but after this much time I feel like you're just using that as a nice excuse to turn me down. So, I must ask, am I just a texting buddy? It sure feels like it and I really don't want to get pulled into anything if you're just using me like that. Please be completely honest."

What Guys Said 2

  • Dude if it's not too late, don't develop any more feelings for her. You don't wanna mess with a girl like that, trust me.

    • what do you mean? the emotional problems part? or the flaky part?

    • Both. They're both really bad signs, especially the flakyness. The flakyness might be because of the emotional stuff but I doubt it. When someone is depressed, a person of the opposite gender trying to talk to them would be a good thing, so why make up excuses? I'd move on before developing even more feelings if I were you... but of course you do what you feel is right. I could be wrong.

  • If she's getting help to quit drinking then they will tell her to take a year off from dating. Live your life, and in time she wants you in great. But you are trying to bight off more than you can chew.