My friend is trying to convince me that my online boyfriend of 2 years is a fake

i recently just told my best friend that I have been dating a guy online for the past two years. when I told her that we haven't talked on the phone yet she immediately started to believe that he was a fake and that he was some old guy with a wife and kids and the reason why he doesn't want to talk on the phone is because it will blow is cover. now I don't believe this at all. I've been talking to him everyday for the past two years and I am almost 100 percent positive that he is who he says he is. but the fact that she even brought it up made me think a lot... I mean I think that I know him so well but how do I really know? he could have been lying about everything for the past 2 years. even though I strongly believe that what she's saying isn't true, I can't help but think about it. I really just want to take the next step and talk on the phone or on webcam or something, I mean it has been two years I think its about time, right? I'm just nervous as to what he will say, because I think if he says no I might have to break it off. even if he is who he says he is which I believe he is, I don't want to continue a relationship with someone that isn't going to go anywhere. he says that he doesn't want a girlfriend because of me, and I don't want a boyfriend because of him, but if we're never going to take the next step what's the point of not dating and having actual relationships?

okay I shouldn't have said we were in a 'relationship' because its not exactly that. its not like we're with each other and no one else, we still hook up with other people but we're not in relationships because we have feelings for each other.
you probably don't understand.. and I don't expect any of you to. I'm not some loser with no friends who sits at home all day talking to people I don't know on the computer. me and him actually met by accident...
i never thought of myself as the type of person that would fall for someone online, but then it just kind of happened. I still hook up with guys and my life is not the computer I go out and do regular things, we only really talk at night when were both home


Most Helpful Guy

  • Well personally I believe your relationship is fake, regardless of whether or not the guy is fake. If you've never talked, seen each other, or done anything together you can't call that a relationship at all, just may be a pen pal at best.

    Ask yourself, why a guy (we're talking the ones that NEED physical intimacy) would not want to meet you after TWO YEARS, not to mention not even talk to you. He most likely has a family and is enjoying the attention that you are giving him, though he is doing a descent job of keeping his cheating to a low level.

    Why would you want a relationship with somebody who after so long doesn't even want to talk to you? How much of a relationship do you think you can have through a computer?

    This is a sham caused by modern technology. Giving the illusion that you have an emotion bond with somebody you've never met.

    I don't know if you're ridiculously shy or have low self esteem but you need to turn the computer off and go look for something REAL in your life.

    • Thanks for your opinion, it was harsh but I appreciate it.

      im not shy, and I don't have a low self-esteem. I'm a normal 17.. almost 18 year old girl. I go out, hang out with friends, and hook up with guys. I just don't have a boyfriend because I have really strong feelings for this guy online. we met by accident and I never thought I would be hte kind of girl to have feelings for someone I've never met before, but it just kind of happened. I'm going to talk to him tonight about the whole phone thing

    • Show All
    • Yea, I tend to get pretty harsh.

    • Maybe since you're a minor he is being careful. I trust your judgement. Just be careful.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • Having a relationship for two years over the internet is pointless. Stop fooling yourself and don't pretend that you're in an actual relationship with someone until you've met them in person.

  • Bottom line: confront him and ask wy he hasn't talked to you on the phone, but honestly you need to get out of the house and have a real relationship. You will get more interaction dating a chia pet than you would dating someone online.


What Girls Said 1

  • How can you have a boyfriend of 2 years on the internet? that's not a boyfriend.

    And I'm sorry but .. didn't this hit you before? come on. people are amazing at bullsh*tting and lying, especially on the internet. I can't believe you would actually believe someone 100% who you haven't even seen or talked to on the phone yet. Seriously, you need to just get rid of him, block him everything. That's really messed up.