We've been non exclusive for a year and now i've hit a rut after he treated me like a side chick?

Me and this boy have been dating for over a year. We met last summer but he went back to school and I stayed at school in the city. Being in a long distance relationship didn't seem right so we talked everyday while apart and would be together when we were home. When he got back things were a bit weird at first but within a month he was sleeping over every night, I was having dinner and sleeping at his family's house, he called me his girlfriend to his friends and family, and i love you's where exchanged everyday. We hadn't discussed being exclusive again in a month but i thought it was moving toward this because we'd gotten really serious again and he was home for good. This past Friday we didn't speak all day until 11:30 pm when he told me to come to a bar downtown that i'd happened to be going to either way. We met up and on the way back to my apartment I saw him texting a girl and realized that he'd been trying to meet up with her and when it didn't work out, he resorted to me. I only realized this the day after but was still upset about him texting her and called him out on it. I told him that i could tell that he and i had different end goals and he said he wasn't sure of what he wanted to which i responded that i couldn't be with him anymore. He started apologizing and begging me not to break up with him and that he'd stop talking to all other girls. After I realized that he was trying to meet up with the other girl the next morning, I could never get back with him. I feel entirely hurt and betrayed and need to end things with him for good. I want to do it through a text because i don't think he should get to see me after what he did. Is what i'm feeling warranted and should i do it in person or over text?


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What Guys Said 2

  • If i understand your wording you're saying that you have not been exclusive for over a year (non exclusive meaning you have been dating but your not opposed to seeing other people). Your answer is in the question, you have not been exclusively dating, therefore he treated you like any other girl because you agreed that you could see other people yet still date? Just because it is long distance, it doesn't mean it shouldn't be exclusive. The way i'm interpreting your question it sound like he's had permission.

    Then again if it is just a simple misswording then I am completely off base...

  • Hold on here girl. Before I let loose I need you to clear something up. Do you mean to say that he said he stop calling other girls altogether when you confronted him and then made plans to meet one the next morning after the fact? Or you found out that he had planned on meeting said girl the next morning but made those plans before he told you he would stop calling other girls? This makes a huge difference.


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