If she wasn't interested in meeting up again she would have stopped talking to me, right?

I'm stressing out over a girl I met a month and a half ago. We went on date 3 last weekend and I thought it went very well, we danced, kissed often, and even though she turned down my offer of going to my place (we live a good distance apart and she had to be up early for work stuffs) she cuddled next to me and waited for my train with me.

Since then though she's been crazy busy with work. I still hear from her every day and she responds to the messages I'd sent her but it all happens early in the morning or late in the evening, and nowhere near the levels it had been before.

She's already told me she can't do anything through this weekend, friends are moving away, she's got meetings with professors for thesis work, and she's got to write at least a few chapters to catch up.

Should I be concerned at all even though she says she's too busy to meet up for now? I feel like it she wasn't actually interested she'd just stop talking to me...


Most Helpful Guy

  • Well, in 6 weeks you've only had 3 dates. Put that in perspective. If you had 3 dates in 1 week, there'd be more concern. Now, you went through the "Pre-Dating" (like preseason) honeymoon phase... she's working and going to school, and it's not like she's been with you the whole time since you known her. Communication has died down some, sure... but the communication was so prevalent because of the "new boy, new girl" situation. It's not so much that anymore.

    However, yeah, you're freaking out because regardless of the Whys -- you do see a tapering off. And you don't want to lose her. My advice? Just chill. Don't get too caught up into it.

    Bad News: Yes, a girl will still text a guy she's not that into anymore, on a less frequent level. That's actually quite common. Not every girl disappears. And Interest in another person doesn't go from 60->0 instantly either. :) And it doesn't have to be you not being a good match for her to make her interest wane. It could be a crazy busy life will help wane it.

    Good News: But, if she is interested, during a crazy busy life, you can get a sense of the above -- and sure, it doesn't feel good on your end -- but it's just a period of time. There's less to chit-chat constantly about during a day! You've already had 3 dates and have known each other for a good while already. Chill. Her primary focus isn't to run off into the sunset with prince charming which is you (or anyone else). Fine. Doesn't mean things aren't still in the mix!

    In the end, just ride it out, take a chill pill, and don't send her tons'o'texts to try and keep "things alive". Just keep things rolling without pushing anything. Throw it out there that you understand, and suggest going out on Wednesday or something for a quickie-date in her area you'll go out toward. If she's maybe-we'll-see, don't freak out. When the new week begins, if she's still up-in-the-air about meeting again, then explore other options but keep HER on the back burner.


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What Girls Said 2

  • Nah, I wouldn't worry about it. Work's been crazy for me too and I answer my texts early or late just like her because that's when I have time to talk. As long as she isn't going all distant on you, gives you short answers and sending out like a different vibe you are fine :) keep talking to her, be patient and relax, it will all work out!

  • Yes we get busy but too busy for you does not sound good and texting less is a slow burning brush offf. However I could be wrong I've had. Guy use the busy talk and now its fizzled out and I am
    Not into him anymore. Relax see what happens but do not do all the initiating. Let her do some work too


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