Signs that my BF was still hung up on his ex - thoughts please?

My ex was divorced for about a year - he was with his ex for a total of 14 years and was married for 4 of them. I think he was still hung up on her. Here are my clues:
1) he talks about her angrily
2) when I mention that "you can't go back to an ex" or say "she didn't want to be a wife", he gets quiet and melancholy
3) he invited her and her cousin to Easter dinner since they are Italian and have no family here?
4) he helped her move to her new apartment and called her when he needed a favor
5) he never seemed really into our relationship and was very non committal


Most Helpful Girl

  • He's 'More than still hung Up on his Ex,' sweetie... He Is most likely still in love with her. And you are what I call a "Rebound Rebecca' for him.
    By him even Mentioning her name, shouting it Out at the top of his lungs, and is Still even 'Moving and grooving' with her, tells me he hasn't licked any of his wounds, and has you as his 'Stand by',' having his sweet ass cake and eating it too.
    He's Not Ready for Any 'Relationship,' let alone 'Non committal.' He still lives in the past, has this Ghost remaining in the eaves of his heart and Under his skin, and as long as That is going on Big Time, it's what I call a "Triangle Threesome," where you are at the very tip, looking down and around, at the both of them still in their Own World And----Relationship.
    Sit this little pup down and have a pet talk with him soon. Stand your ground, being firm, Protect your turf, barking your Own orders Now. He has You now, can't have you Both in his doghouse, and tell him to either throw her away like yesterday's old bone, or take his leash and walk Out the door and go to her and to hell.
    He's barking up the wrong tree, never giving thought to your feelings. And with what has been going On under your cute little nose or even Not-------He hasn't let the sleeping dogs lie.
    Good luck. xx

    • Once again, your advice is awesome! His ex's energy was all over him and it was a big red flag but I ignored it. Even now, after he broke up with me a month ago, he is still playing "pull me, push me" and it is playing with my mind! I have cut him off completely now. He has not processed his divorce nor has he healed - my guess is that she wanted out but he claims it was mutual. He seems depressed and disturbed by what happened - I only know the tip of the iceberg, I am sure there is a lot I don't know. I know now to avoid recently divorced men like the plague- lol!

    • Show All
    • Wow, what a story... He lost two in a row... He seems to have a pattern, this lite bulb loser... You're Definitely better off... Let another pup take him on, but I am sure like you and the other, he will dig his grave with her as well... Every dog has its day, as they say... He's going to have Many ahead... xx

    • Hope you're okay... Glad I Could be here for you... xx

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What Guys Said 1

  • 2) Holy cow, thats some mean stuff to say to him! I'd get sad too!!

    3) Yea that's a red flag.
    4) Also a red flag.
    5) Not a red flag, this was just about you guys.

    But mostly, you guys are broken up now, so it doesn't really matter if he was or wasn't. By your own words "you can't go back to an ex" right? So why dwell on this? Go find a guy who isn't recently divorced so you won't have to worry about this again :)

    • The reason I said those "mean" things were in response to him bad mouthing her so frequently. Also the not being into the relationship - he was preoccupied thinking if her so I think he couldn't be emotionally available. He was fresh off the divorce so that's always a red flag when you start dating someone. When you are still emotionally attached to someone you can't go forward with someone else - trust me, I'm older and have been through a divorce. Timing was bad. And yes, he's an ex and will stay that way. He wasn't the greatest guy anyway- lol

What Girls Said 0

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