I am not trying to insinuate hate with my topic title. I am just wondering what women think about black men. Would you date them? Would you not date them? What is your reasoning behind your decision?
Being a black male myself, I've heard mixed things from women, and I usually have a hard time dating because of my skin color.
There have been quite a few times in my life where women have not taken the next step in their relationship with me, simply because they do not date black men. I have even tried dating sites and have been told by women they do not black men or they explicitly make it clear in their profile that they do not date black men. And even though many women say I have the qualities they want in a man, I have been told that they just aren't interested in black guys.
Are stereotypes influencing this decision? When people think about black men, I always think they feel we are going to come around wearing baggy clothing, sagging, talking really loud, bring a "gang" with us and act hardcore ghetto.
I am 23, have superb manners, speak properly, finished my 4 year degree at my university, have a nice job, have a car, a luxury apartment, work out quite actively and I lead a pretty quiet life... and I enjoy reading and writing. I have also been told many times I am quite a good dresser. In no way do I act like the stereotypes depicted in media.
So... I ask again. Why do some women seem so against the idea of dating a black man? Not trying to insinuate anything, I am just curious.
Most Helpful Girl
I understand where you're coming from, except I'm a black female. And I don't really mean anything by this but I've seen it a lot worse for black women. I think people had attached a stigma to us that no matter how well off we are or how well we handle ourselves, communicate, anything, we always have some pitfall. For men it's the gang and crime thing, women it's the attitude or the baby daddy thing. Since these stigmas are so prominent, people can't shake them whether they know us or not. It's almost unconscious. However, I will throw out (and you may not see it because of demographics where you live) but nowadays more and more women are starting to date black men, but it isn't the same for the women. In any given day, I see a couple consisting of a black man and any race of woman maybe six times. Number of black women with any race of man, one. And I don't care personally, love who you love because I will, but what sucks is it's all one sided. And it definitely isn't fair when you get shallow answers like 'the sex is great' or ' he's doing something with his life, he's gonna be a rapper.' It makes no sense to me honestly. People need to be more genuine in general and just get to know a person before they date them and be with them for that; not base whether they do or not on a color.1