How Do I Meet Women? -- This Is Depressing Me?

A little about me:

Age: 23

Race: Black

Body Type: 5'10 & athletic. I go to the gym 4 times a week.

Fashion Style: Blazers, button-downs w/sleeves rolled up, fitted jeans, nice white sneakers, sometimes fashion boots, suits, long-sleeved henley shirts w/sleeves rolled up & watches.

Education Level: Bachelor's Degree (next week when I graduate)

Personality: Somewhat quiet and shy, can come off as a bit serious at times when I am around people I don't know, but I am very friendly and smile a lot. When I loosen up, I am goofy, funny, and pretty much the life of the party. People enjoy being around me when they get to know me.

Seriosuly. I'm just about to graduate... and despite going to college bars and clubs, I can't meet women. Never had a girlfriend, never has sex, and never had my first kiss.

When I try to talk to women, even a simple convo starter, "Hey, how are you doing today?" They get pissy, show lack of interest, answer me while looking at their cell phone (they don't even make eye contact with me) or they shrug me off.

Last girl I liked and connected with really well, recently (as in today) told me she is too busy to go out. I know she works full-time and goes to school, but she has weekends off... and she told me she was too busy. Yeah... too busy for me.

When I get out of college next week, I will be working a full-time post college job, plus a weekend job... so 7 days a week. I'll pretty much have no more opportunities to meet women.

I'm not a bad guy, but women never give me any chances to prove what a fun, date-worthy guy I can be.

Where are some good places to meet quality women? And how can I approach them without being shrugged off without getting a chance?

I haven't even been approaching women lately, because it's always the same outcome. And women always seem to overlook me. Just not sure anymore.


Most Helpful Girl

  • How Do I Meet Women?
    Approach gals you find attractive
    Meetup groups
    Hobby groups
    Online dating
    Basically any place where women are

    Where are some good places to meet quality women?
    Pretty much anywhere in my opinion. College seems to be quite the hotspot.

    And how can I approach them without being shrugged off without getting a chance?
    Being shrugged off is a matter of attraction and appeal. Perhaps it's suited to not think of dating/approaching as the women you find attractive/appealing giving you chances because you're not a bad guy. I doubt you go around giving chances approaching gals you find unattractive/unappealing on the chance she may not be a bad gal.


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • Do you have any hobbies you enjoy? Finding a meetup group you are interested in would be a good place to start because there would be like minded people there to get to know/possibly date.

    • I do have hobbies, but I just don't have the money to invest into my hobbies right now. I like going to the gym (I go the university gym). I can't take classes (like yoga and such) because those cost money at my school. I like going to the bookstore. Going out at night and just exploring. Playing soccer, boxing, bike riding, reading and writing.

    • I have tried to connect with women at the gym and during my outings, like at the bookstore... but they don't seem to want to be bothered when I try to make conversation with them.

    • Maybe it's the environment at the gym. Some of my friends go into workout mode, where they are usually approachable in other circumstances, but at the gym all they care about is working out. What about clubs on campus? For my campus, you can still actively participate if you don't attend school there or have already graduated. How's your approach at the bookstore? Like is there an icebreaker or joke thrown in?

What Guys Said 1

  • Very informative, well-written. I'd say mentally list your activities and find the ones you're good at and find social places where there's competitions, races, or whatever it is and you meet other passionate people. Excellent way to network. I don't know about your behaviour though, and that's the best thing, even more important than appearance, according to what I've learned so far.