Why are things so weird between us now?

So this married girl and I became friends quickly when I first started my job over a year ago. She was shy and would stare at me like crazy in meetings. I would ways see her out walking the halls and I would bump into her all the time and I'd get this deer in headlights look from her. One day I stopped her in the hall and she turned deep red and looked down at the floor and had to like calm herself to get her words out. Like stuttering etc. Shortly after this we had a routine of meeting each other in the hallways and walking and talking together. She'd do this with me for a bunch of days in a row then go missing on me. Then come back and repeat. I got annoyed by this up and down stuff so I went through periods where I would disappear on her and ignore her. This would make her wonder what was up. We did this dance for months. I talked about other girls being hot around her and talked to lots of women (older not hot), overtime I noticed her flirt with a buddy of mine sometimes right in front to me sometimes watching me while she did it. I started to skip many if our monthly group lunches. Now she skips like all of them last 8 months worth when she used to go to them all. I ignored her hard for almost two months and was cold too her. I know she was upset with me because I'd test her out occasionally and stop by her desk or in the hall and it was like she was too busy to chat. She'd do his barely turn around from her computer thing. During the two month ignoring time I felt something would happen. My buddy tells me she has been walking and talking with him everyday out to the parking lot to leave and for lunch. I park in differnt lot so in didn't know it was happening. He said it was creeping him out a little. Lol. It made me mad/jealous. I'd never seen them walk and talk like her and I used to ever so this through me off. Now her and I never see each other, I think we both avoid. What the hell happened here? What is this? Thanks!


Most Helpful Girl

  • Perhaps things are awkward because she is married and she is picking up that her innocent flirting or friendliness with you might be taken for something more then what it actually is. So she avoids an uncomfortable situation because she is not looking to cheat on her husband.

    Perhaps she is hanging around more so with other co-workers that has more of a comfort level because she knows she can be herself without the worry of it being taken the wrong way and someone expecting her to have an affair since she is married.

    Unless she is separated and is currently going through a divorce she should be off limits and there shouldn't be any reason for you to be jealous.

    Personally I would just keep the relationship on a professional level. It will take time but through actions she will start to realize that you are not wanting to break up a marriage and you both can have a 'working relationship'

    • What you say make sense, but I feel like she's need for attention. If she hasn't seen me in a while she will search me out and put herself in a place she knows I'll be at a certain time, and it's just bizarre. I think she enjoys knowing I like her.

    • She may feel flattered and maybe she does seek you out after awhile but maybe it more to see if things have chained on how you feel about her or the awkward situation between you too. When she sees you she senses or realizes nothing has changed then she starts to avoid you again.

    • That could be, but why? Why does she stare at me in meetings to see if I'm looking? Putting herself around me before we even knew each other? Went and started talking and walking with my buddy for basically the whole time I ignored her, then when I started talking to her again and giving her attention she stops talking to him and starts back with me!

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2


  • leave her alone. she is married

    • I am leaving her alone for sure. But what happened with all this awkwardness. I'm not trying to get with her, but I work with her and I don't want things to be so weird. What was all this?

    • who cares, you are working with her not seeing her. just ignore or pretend to be nice like she is doing with you. act like you care while thinking about other things. hit on single women at work. there has to be some hotties to date that are available.

What Guys Said 1

  • She is married, what are you doing?

    Don't play flirty games with married chicks, not fair to you or him.

    • What do you mean you or him?

    • Show All
    • She played them with me for over a year... She's more at fault than me

    • Takes 2 to tango buddy. Don't be that guy.

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