Why won't he make more of an effort?

I just don't know what to think about this guy anymore. I've found myself thinking about him all the time, too much in fact. I met him at a house party in the beginning of the summer. Things started off great - we danced, had great chemistry, asked for my number, etc. Then I was so enraptured by his charm that I wanted to hang out again naturally. He seemingly disappears, but turns out he was out on a trip. Then when he got back he was more than excited to hang out again. He claims that I'm attractive, funny, and smart, so I assume that he must like me on some level. We ended up hanging at his place and one thing led to another and we had sex. He wanted to hang out again. We make plans to hang out again. But when the day comes around, no confirmation happens so I forget about it and hang out with my friends. Then he asks what's up are we still hanging out? I was like well you didn't confirm the plan. We then try to hang out again, but the same thing happened. I gave up knowing that this guy doesn't plan well and it wouldn't amount to much anything. But then the past week and a half, we literally use all forms of social media to talk. I've enjoyed it so much and found myself agonizing over the next time he texts me and just makes me want him more. He invites me to events and for me to visit his workplace. Our conversations can also be flirty. I just don't get it. Why bother continuing to chat and then inviting me to hang out, but don't set up firm times? Do I just look easy to him? I don't want to appear needy, but I desperately want to hang out with him again. If he likes me, why won't he make more of an effort?


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What Guys Said 2

  • I'd hang in there. If he is genuinely interested he'll make this happen. If he seems indifferent when making plans and continues failing to follow through though, I'd move on.

    • if that happens, does that mean he's no longer interested or just not invested?

    • That or he simply just doesn't know what he wants.

      You might be better suited to more of a man, or just a solid guy. Someone grounded. These types usually know what they want and if they're pursuing you then you are it.

  • He might be old school or doesn't want to appear needy. When both of you do that this can happen. I don't call to confirm myself.


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