Is it a bad idea to see where things are going with this girl I met on a dating site?

Lets dive right in. About 2 weeks ago, a girl messaged me on a dating site. I hadn't thought about dating for some time and this was a pleasant suprise. She seemed nice, so i replied to her message. Het profile pick was quite blurry and I could really see her all that well.
After a few days, she added me on Facebook and I saw some decent pixtures of her for the first time. I will probably sound like an shallow asshole, but I didn't find het that attractive. This is just a feeling I had. Yet, she seemed really into me and I thought she was fun to chat with, so we planned a date.

The date went pretty well. Yet, at the end of it, I still wasn't sure what I really wanted. During the date, I got the feeling she really really liked me. I have never really experienced this. I have never had a gf or even kissed a girl dor that matter.

The thing now is, I am afraid I am stepping into something with the wrong intentions. This girl isn't someone I see myself ending up with, but I dont think that alone is enough to stop things with her. I think I am interested in her, because she is interested in me and I want to know what thst is like when things get a bit more seriousm is this a bad idea? What do you think?

If you want me to elaborate, ask right ahead!

I ended things with her. She took it better than expected, but it still was a surprise to her. I explained it to her to the best of my ability. I am very relieved that this is over with. It was starting to feel 'wrong'. thanks for your advice! :)


Most Helpful Girl

  • No point in carrying on. You're not doing her any favours here. In fact, the more you prolong this, the more time will go that SHE isn't finding a guy that will like her a bit more. If the chemistry isn't there and you just aren't in to this, then it's not going to get better with time. Don't worry about breaking her heart, because how she reacts to what you do is her business, not yours. Take care of yourself and find a better girl for you, and likewise, let her find a better guy for her.

    • You are right. Very much so. I wasn't looking forward to breaking this to her, but you've helped me realize that this simply has to be done. I was originally planning on going on a second date first, but I already knew deep inside that this was going nowhere.

      Thank you for your advice :)

    • Show All
    • What you said made a lot of sense to me. Once again, thank you for the advice. It helped me make this decision a lot faster than it would otherwise have taken. :)

    • No problem, and thank you for MH :)

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 3

  • Put yourself in the other ones shoes. If she feels different than you would you want her to strong you along? It's best to be honest. Tell her you don't want a girlfriend but you do like her. From what I gather that's what you want. And if she is that into you she will be okay with that and keep going. You are over thinking this. Just be humble and honest, it seems like you already have been.

    • She said before she wants to see where this goes, but I feel she is more certain about this than I am.

      I do like her, but I think we are a bit too different in the long run. I am just afraid I end up hurting her because I enjoyed being liked by her.

      While typing that, I strongly feel that I also want to see where it goes. You are right, I am probably over think this, like I always do :/

  • just tell her how you feeel.

  • If you like her then no


What Guys Said 1

  • Damn dude I'm sort of in the same situation

    • Sucks, doesn't it? :/

      Have you made up your mind on eBay you are going to do yet?

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    • I will follow Hollyanne's advice. Reading her advice made me realize that there really was no point. Hoping feelings will come later is quite naive and maybe even unrealistic. I was still continuing this for all the wrong reasons. I am going to break the news to her now; it will suck, but it has to be done.

    • See the thing in my situation is I dont know if I like her or if I like her because she likes me