Does rejecting a girl for a "relationship", who was promiscuous in the past, seem misguided and do you think your own promiscuity is a plus or minus?

People call it judgmental to not want to be with someone with a promiscuous past, but if I am considering being in relationship with someone then I feel I should be pretty picky.

Present is most important but the past isn't some irrelevant list of events, past behavior shouldn't be ignored in my opinion as it is telling.


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  • It depends on if her past may interfere with her future. Like if she's still in touch with all the guys she's hooked up with and you date her and she starts "hanging out" with these same guys I'm gonna assume it's not all in the past.

    If she just happens to have a high number of partners well... I'd be a hypocrite to hold that against her.

    • Yeah I see what you mean, its not the most important thing to me but its something I consider, but my numbers aren't high. I don't ask women, "how many partners have you had?"

      But I will ask about previous relationships and what there experience was, if I notice or hear about a lot of guys then I wonder would this girl make a stable partner?

    • Yea. I'm someone who believes that people in their lower 20's go through a "phase" of partying and all that. So I can be understanding if there were complicated times. I'm 29 now and I do see girls my age who I know partied a quite a bit when they were younger and they're doing just fine.

    • Shit, I am 19, and they start way younger than 20, bruh! There are girls who've done it all in high school. Then when they hit their 20s they get into freak mode.

      I suppose I could get over a party phase but, I'd prefer someone who was more like me and tried to stay true to their values, somewhat.

      I mean generally speaking you're right as people do like to experiment in their youth. But that doesn't mean everybody was living life wildly during that period.

  • Yes I think it's misguided. But that's because I don't judge.

    • So you think that a person who you are considering a serious relationship with past should be ignored, lets say she cheated in the past, is it being judgmental to not want to be with her?

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    • No, your reason doesn't make sense. I am not talking about some random girl, but a girls I date. How can you not be somewhat judgmental?

      You have to judge whether or not they'd make a good partner for you. Now judging on looks is bad like saying she is promiscuous because of how she dresses or because she has a tattoos is bad.

      But if I know she is promiscuous for a fact, then I don't feel I am being overly judgmental.

    • Ok ok you got me there. I got nothing