Why Do Women Always Say This?

I am 23 years old. I have never had a girlfriend. I have never been on an actual date. Never kissed a girl. And still obviously a virgin.

All of my life.. . well since 8th grade... whenever I would talk to girls, get to know them and ask them on dates. I would always get rejected (this still happens) and they would tell me how sweet of a guy I am and that the right girl will come along one day.

Is it wrong of me to find this as an insult? I hate being told that I will find the right girl someday.

-My older brother is 44. Great guy. Great job. Great physique. Can't find any women that truly likes him. As a result, he has a couple of fuck buddies he met from bars.

-My old manager is 60. He has not been in a relationship in over 30 years. No kids. He just works a lot.

-My college professor is also in his 60s. Great guy. Very funny. Told me he has never had a real relationship. No kids either, and he lives alone.

-I also know (not personally) of a few older celebrities in their late 30s and 40s who have never had a real relationship.

I have more examples... but those are just a few.

So... why do women tell guys this, especially if there really if the "right girl" hasn't come along for so many guys?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Women want guys that set their loins on fire. You have to be that guy before anything else. After they decide they want to have sex with you need other traits to keep them around long term. Telling you to wait and the right girl will come around is horrible advice. What they are doing is telling you not to change, when clearly it is time you made some changes.

    I would suggest you read the book Rules of the Game by Neil Strauss. It isn't some book that teaches you to treat women like shit. It is actually the greatest self help book ever written for men. It will walk you through the process to become a better man, that women will admire. Right now you are putting an unattractive image of yourself out there, and need to make some changes. Being yourself isn't working, so now it is time to work on being a better version of yourself that women will actually want to have sex with. You don't have to stop being yourself, when improving yourself. You just become a better version of yourself.

    • Women that don't know what the book is about will assume it is about teaching you to be a player, and will be offended. It isn't about that at all. Women would be much happier if every man had read that book.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 4

  • Are you going after the same type of girls? I let a lot of guys who "had a lot going for themselves," go due to the fact that they were obnoxious. Okay, you studied quantum physics in the 8th, okay you have a nice job, great, you have a nice apartment. But you're probably boring and patronizing. Try dating older women, they will appreciate you. Not these young ones.

  • Maybe these particular girls don't find you attractive and THINK that saying that will help.

    I'm sure it stings, and probably sucks when you hear the same thing over and over,

    But girls who aren't interested aren't worth it, and aren't worth giving a second thought about. Because chances are, they will not even remember you.

    Just move on and stay optomistic and try working on improving yourself.

    Like Social skills
    Sex skills

    Take up hobbies that are interesting, explore the world around you and find some fun new things to get
    conversations going!

    These are some traits I search for in my partners. I am not perfect and work on bettering myself as well,

  • Because girls think it doesn't hurt you guys saying things like that but no, they do. It's our logic- well, it's their logic I have my own.

  • As a virgin girl in your same shoes... it kind of ticks me of to. If I'm such a "wonderful" person, then why doesn't anyone want to date me? I get your feels man.


What Guys Said 4

  • well they're putting you down nicely, surely that is better than insulting you with rejection in public. you just gotta keep trying man. just keep swimming. you're filtering through all these different girls and eventually you'll find the one that likes you.

  • It sounds like you friendzone yourself. I think your brother has it figured out. Follow his model. He finds many right girls.

  • Trying to let you down nicely

  • yeah its just bullshit. dont put any importance on these compliments. till she on your dick for real, assume she doesn't like you

    but you're not alone. there are more and more permanently single men out there, some by choices others not

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