17 and a 21 year old dating?

I'm seventeen and a half, the guy I like is twenty one. We both like each other a lot but he's worried about the age gap. I don't think it's a problem at all but he keeps bring it up. He says he wants to make a good impression on my parents and he's worried about what they will think of the four year age gap. I think they'll be okay with it to be honest. He thinks his family will be okay with it, he's said I look a lot older than 17 (which I do) and I'm very mature. We've been out a couple of times but more as friends than an actual date because we're taking things slow. So, do you think a 17 year old girl dating a 21 year old guy is okay? The legal age here is 16 so there are no laws being broken.


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What Guys Said 1

  • 20 and 24? no problem.

    but 17 to 21 is different, for the reasons mercurykitten said.

    also, the age of consent doesn't automatically mean you can have sex with anyone. many or most states have a gray zone, where someone over 18 can be sexually active with those under 18 ONLY if there's a 2 year age gap, for example. 17 and 19 would be okay, but 17 and 21 is a no-no.

    • Yeah I know some states do but here that isn't the case. Once you turn 16 you can be sexually active regardless of the other persons age.

    • True. But to my understanding, those states are in the minority.

What Girls Said 1

  • I don't think four years is a big gap; however, at your age and his age, it is. He can drink and you can't. He can vote and you can't. He can rent a hotel room and you can't. You see what I'm saying? If he's uncomfortable with it then it's already a problem and is most likely only to get worse.