Will making myself a better person get her attention back?

SO basically I've been a bit of an idiot and instead of going with the flow i put too much focus on pushing the girl I've been seeing to like me more instead of accepting that she doesn't know what she wants…. i got really down about this and did something that has upset her! i didn't sleep with anyone else or something like that but a friend of mine had a go at her saying that it was her fault i was so down! the girl i have been seeing has taken this personally and is not happy about it. we spoke about this last night and she said she isn't going to change how she is with me and she is still there! i asked her if what i had done had killed her feelings for me and her word for word response was not really no then i asked if we can get past this and she said yeah !! i have now realised that i need to relax but what i am asking now is if a better myself and be a better person will it reignite the flame or is all lost now regardless of what you say i am going to make myself a better person anyway for myself i need to learn to love myself before loving anyone else but is there a chance i can fix things with her because i have fell head over heels


Most Helpful Guy

  • You're overthinking this. Way. Too. Much.

    Get out of your head, go grab a beer with your buddies.

    Asking a girl to explain her feelings toward you is a complete waste of time. Focus on yourself, and yes, you can get her more attracted to you.

    Chances are, though, she'll see that you're only doing it to win her back and she'll lose all respect for you. Good luck, though. You never know.

    Have you slept with this girl? Why does she control whether you sleep with other girls, are you two an item or are you just trying to get her to "like" you more? Maybe you *should* sleep with other girls, that'll get her attention.

    You shouldn't have to apologize for your friend - he was standing up for you. If the girl isn't happy, well too bad! It's not like you can control what comes out of someone else's mouth. Have some backbone, man! It's OK for her to be mad at him, but if she's taking it out on you then she's a straight bitch and it's high time you dropped her like a sack of moldy potatoes.

    • im not becoming a better person for her i am doing it for myself I'm just asking if she will notice this

    • There's no guarantee that she will, no. It's worth a shot.

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What Girls Said 2

  • I think your strategy is great! I'm happy that you have decided to improve yourself regardless of your relationship. I believe that if she said that you haven't changed her feelings for you, then your relationship has a chance. Be careful though; She probably likes you for who you are and wouldn't like to see extreme changes in personality etc. good luck :)

    • im not changing who i am i want to be the person i am when things are goos between me and her the happy person I've been focussing all my time and effort on the negative aspects of our relationship instead of the positives my personality isn't going to change but i am going to be more happy with myself rather than just happy with her

    • I am happy for you :)

  • She will defiently notice if you do.
    I always notice when a guy does and they even know I'm not instrested.
    I enjoy seeing them change because it's part of our growth process, needed to happen sometime.
    If this dosent happen for you and her, take the good things that you've changed and find another who will appericate the way you're looking for.


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