I reconnected with a woman from my past who was a great friend when were young. We got together and seemed to have a great chemistry, flirting, talking all the time, meeting after work and I told her that I was falling for her. All of sudden things changed, no more pet names, flirting, getting together one-on-one, texting all the time. She showed so much interest and her non verbal language really showed that she liked me. But after I told her how I felt for her she backed off, I asked her if I was pushing her away and she said no, I tuned down on sharing my feelings. She would and still respond to my texts but if I text anything that has to do with romance she stays silent. She used to share her feelings and the “I wish that it was true” but now nothing. She upset me on night when we were with friends by completely ignoring me. Two days later I told her that she upset me and she replied That she was sorry for making me feel that way. When I was away she called me to check on me but now that I’m back she started to ignore me again. She told me that she hid herself because I shared my feelings. I asked her straight forward if she liked me and if we would have any else then a friendship and she did not respond. She did not like the pressuring question. She hasn’t completely cut me off but will not engage like she used to. Also she had a really bad relationship and other negative experiences. She has told me several times that she’s scared. Even her daughter told her that we should be together and asked her if should stay scared forever. Did I showed her that I wanted her too much? she got mad a t me a couple of times for pretty much no reason too.. What should I do?
Did I smother her too much when I should have taken things slower?
What Girls Said 1
I don't think you smothered her. You were just saying how you feel. You say she's scared and has had bad experiences so you may just need to take it slow with her. If she's special enough (and it sounds like she is), take time to build a relationship with her strictly as her friend. Be supportive, caring, and more importantly, build trust with her. When she can see that she really can trust you, I think she'll be ready to go to the next step. She just doesn't seem like she's ready for anything serious right now. I had a bad breakup about a year ago and dated some really great guys afterward but after what I had just been through, I was not interested in being in a relationship again. I was still trying to recover. I ended up falling for someone who had invested time in me, pursued me and who I really trusted. I don't think it's too late for you to build that friendship. When she is comfortable and has let her guard down with you, you'll know it.1
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