Am I the reason why he broke it off with his girlfriend, or is it coincedence?

About a month ago, I get a weird text from a guy I haven't talked to in a year. We had one date and talked for about two months until I moved. We had a great time getting to know each other, and had chemistry. But both knew distance ended it. Anyways, he texts me he was thinking of me and hopes I am well. I answered neutrally, and said things are well, and I hope he is well too. it took me off guard that he made contact with me after a year and I knew he had a girlfriend, hence why I kept my response neutral. Anyways, just now, maybe a little over a month after that text, I discover he is no longer with his girlfriend. They seemed to be doing wonderful on social media. And suddenly no longer together. No idea who broke up with who. But I found it odd, and weird and him texting me as a red flag for his relationship, so I think he broke it off. do you think I may have influenced the break up, or perhaps he was in a vulnerable stage and wanted to see who gave him attention? Share your thoughts please:)


Most Helpful Guy

  • 1. He wanted to break up with her in first place
    2. He just used you as an emotional support at that juncture
    3. Even if you weren't there situation for him would have been the same
    4. You are in no way to blame for this and please allow me to confidently assure you of that

    • Thank you for your answer! From a male's point of view, why did he choose me for emotional support, especially since we haven't talked to each other in almost a year?

    • Show All
    • It's a very normal and common thing amongst the general populace to (1) bank for emotional support at a time when one is emotionally low (2) when you've had chemistry with someone even if just sexual during a moment as described in '(1)' above one tends to seek solace in such a 'partner'
      (3) you are looking more into it as you've had emotional attachment to him and it's normal since most women will perceive it that way i. e. emotionally

      For men most time it's need of the hour but for women it's about emotional attachment and getting attention from someone they like :-)

    • Thank you very much young lady for your thoughtful and generous gesture of selecting my opinion the MH :-) I appreciate your gracious gesture wholly :-)

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What Guys Said 1

  • I think it was probably the opposite, in that he was probably having problems with his girlfriend and was just reaching out to 'hear' from another woman. So he wouldn't have broken up with his girlfriend BECAUSE of you. Rather, it sounds like a case where he was having issues with his girlfriend, and those issues led to both actions: him contacting you, and him and his gf breaking up.

    Nobody in any normal situation would use a fairly ambiguously worded text message from a girl he dated once as a reason to break up.

    When a relationship starts going south, guys start digging through their little black books. It's pretty common.

    • I greatly appreciate your thorough answer, but "their little black books" is this implying their past flings/romances...

    • Yeah, past flings, past romances, girls that were friends that they never made the move on, girls that they had hung out with a couple times but weren't actually dating... lots of different girls can fit the bill. Usually when a guy is fishing like that he will cast the net pretty wide to see who doesn't answer, who answers in a 'formal' way, and who answers in a way that implies they are lonely or in a bad position or bad relationship.

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