How to let a new guy know you're not interested?

Yesterday I was stopped on the way to class by a guy who boldly asked me for my number. It completely caught me off guard and I agreed to give it to him, knowing he wasn't really my type. I might be open to trying to get to know him better first, except after he put my number in his phone, he pulled out a cigarette and I really cannot date a smoker. I'm now expecting a text/call from him any day now but don't know if I should tell him immediately that I'm not interested? Should I say it's because of his smoking? Any help on what to say or do would be appreciated!

He texted me and I voiced my disinterest in a way I thought was polite but clear. I appreciate the answers! Thanks! (:


Most Helpful Guy

  • You say exactly that. "You caught me off guard with your proposal, I normally don't give my number out to guys that quickly. I don't think I can go out with you, I don't think you're my type, and I don't date smokers. Sorry"

    But you know he'll say he only smokes at bars and isn't a smoker.

    • Thank you very much! (: That seems like a good, genuine way to be straightforward with him without being rude. I was mainly confused on what to do because I was afraid that I'd already led him on by giving him my number in the first place! That's definitely not something I try to do!

    • You're welcome, good luck.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 4

  • Well, you just... use your words. Assuming you can speak.
    "I'm not interested" works just fine, gets to the point.

    Simply losing contact or ignoring him would be rude and confusing, so simply telling him exactly how you feel is the way to go. Not sure why you'd have trouble with that.

    • Believe it or not I am completely capable of using my words. I was really looking for a better way to phrase it.

  • I know you want to sound polite to him, that you dislike smokers. But flake/ don't reply any of his texts/calls usually help.. unless he's a freak

    • Thanks for replying! (: Truth be told, I have no idea if he's a freak or not! I can definitely say I've never met a guy who was as bold as he was (which does give me kind of a weird vibe), that's for sure.

  • Tell him what you wrote here. It's pretty honest and to the point without being mean about it. Don't ignore his texts like has been suggested because that's a dick move.

    • Thank you for the reply! (: I was thinking that ignoring him might not be best, just based on what I've heard from other guys in the past. I feel like since I gave him a mixed signal when i gave him my number I shouldn't just leave it without clarification.

  • Just be honest with him. Next time don't give out your number.


What Girls Said 1

  • dont respond to his texts. he'll get it. something tells me a guy who stops a random girl he doesn't know and just asks for her phone number isn't that sensitive anyway

    • Thank you for the answer! I do agree that his character did come off questionable when he was so forward and I doubt a light rejection will be too hard for him if he's that willing to put himself out there! (:

    • Ignore his texts? That's rude. So he'll spend days wondering what's up. All you need to do is be honest. Ignoring him is a dick move especially knowing he will be wondering. He probably thought she was good looking and someone he may like to get to know. It's unlikely he just wants to bang her- despite what most girls think, MOST guys aren't like that. Yes he had the balls to ask for her number, but he may be shy enough to fumble the approach and just went for the number. Besides how is he to start something without making a move? Ignoring him is cold and heartless and unnecessary. Bad advice. Someone you fancy should ignore you- guru. Would serve you right, as I'm guessing you do in uncomfortable situations or with something you don't want to deal with. I'm sorry to be harsh but when the heart is involved, respect, consideration, and care must be taken. Don't be a dick!

    • if he's intelligent he wouldn't need to spend days wondering what an unanswered text means. its 2014, people are glued to their phones. if you don't get a response its bc they don't like hyou

      why are you over blowing this situation, talking about hearts and shit? more like his dick got hard and he wanted to try his luck. he doesn't know her from a can of paint but he's going to be heart broken and emotionally hurt because a girl he knew for less than 30 minutes ignored his text?

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