Why do I have such poor luck with girls?

I can compile an unusually long list of rejections. For some reason, I am either always friendzoned or rejected immediately or shortly following the first date. I do not get it.

>> I am normal weight
>> Have an athletic body type (minus the abs), go to the gym
>> I do not smoke or use drugs
>> I have exceptionally good teeth (straight, even, white, evenly spaced with hardly any gap)
>> I am outgoing, especially when I want to be
>> I am a good guy, do not pressure, very low-key and easy going

Bad features
>> I am short at 5 feet 7 inches at 20 years old (but I am attracted to girls shorter than me and attempt more with them)
>> I am awkward and do not always conform to the norm. People pick up on it and describe me as awkward behind my back.
>> I can be sensitive at times

But I see people YOUNGER than me getting engaged, being in long term relationships, and getting lucky. I see plenty my age and younger with BABIES.


Girls tell me all the time that I am the perfect guy a woman could have

And I have been told I am attractive, some even saying I am hot


Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm sure your bad features are not being 5'7" ~ that's actually a nice size for the majority of girls in the world... a few inches taller and you start getting into the limited range... and need to make up for it with something else

    when you said your Awkward... i suspect there's something more that you do not see about that, because i have known many guys and girls who had some type of personality flaw... its not a great flaw and its often easily over come, but they do not see it... and it just keeps people from crossing that romance line with them.

    sometimes with men, esp younger, they lack self awareness... they sniff their nose over and over and over... and widen their eyes, always not aware of whats going on... and to a girl it means they are not developed yet or have some mental defect... biology is strong

    I'm not sure what it could be with you personally, since i don't know you. but i would suggest posting a picture or two, a lot shows through or your personality in some cases. and maybe you will get lucky with some insight.

    best luck

    • Updated profile pic

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    • well yea if you only like virgins, you should have started dating 5 years ago ^__^ but why does it matter much?

    • Thanks for clarifying that. Like that helps me feel better. :/

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 7

  • You do seem like a nice, decent guy, so pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasePLEASE, don't listen to those bitter assholes who tell you that girls only go after jerks. Ever seen a pile of dumb muscle hitting on the girls in a club? Most of them reject those douchebags. The problem with "nice" guys is not the fact that they're nice per se - quite often, they don't make their advances clear or focus too much on being "nice" to maintain good looks (which IS quite an important part of dating, but it doesn't seem like it's your problem, you're pretty good-looking).

    Now, awkwardness. Awkwardness ruins everything, no matter how good your other qualities are. I have been guilty of being awkward myself, but have shed it for the sake of just enjoying my weirdness. I hug everyone, I smile all the time, I sing when I feel like it (even in public!) and try not to give a crap about what people think. I've found that letting your weirdness run free attracts the best kinds of people, the ones you actually want around. Join a club maybe, a drama club or a sports club or maybe an art club... people hanging around in clubs like that are fantastic!

    PS I know you've mentioned liking your girls shorter than yourself, but as a 5'9" girl I have to say that I really don't mind a guy being shorter than me. Then again, who am I to talk... never had a date myself, let alone a boyfriend ;) But it seems like all that I've mentioned in this opinion has worked to some extent for people I know. Good luck to ya pal.

  • You sound like a really nice guy, it may be the girls you're going after. You'll meet someone, you've just got to keep trying.(: Try all different types of women, no one girl is the same. You can't help it that you're unintentionally awkward, so embrace it!:D

  • Chemistry is missing. There's no explaining that. You can't make a list about that. You either have it or you don't. And you haven't found it yet. There's nothing yoire doing wrong, it's just chenisrry

  • I'm sure there is someone out there for you. However, I must note that some girls just love bad guys, who pay them no attention. Most girls want a guy they can't have and continue to chase a douchebag, thereby ignoring the nice and decent guy in the background. Don't worry, you're only 20 years old so you've got plenty of time to meet the right girl out there.

    • I am sort of in a rush, only because I want a virgin girl. Otherwise, it would not be a problem

  • You sound like the kind of guy I would date, but of course if all comes down on the personality and how u present yourself

  • It may just be the type of girls your attracting. Or they feel intimidated by your looks! :) can be a number of things but don't worry you'll find someone!

  • U sound like a guy I would date.
    U probably just haven't found "the one". And ur only 18-24 ur young, I don't plan on settling down till I'm like 27 or 30.


What Guys Said 4

  • There's what women "want" on a social level, and there's what women want on a more animalistic, primal level. The latter is far more influential.

    We have a thing called mirror neurons, it's how we are able to experience what another person is feeling. Unfortunately, this can work against you in dating. If you are awkward, in turn, girls will feel awkward, and they will eject themselves physically or emotionally from whatever is causing it.

    Also, there's nothing wrong with having a sensitive side, but if you're viewed as a sensitive male it will be an uphill battle.

    • I always knew whenever I'm feeling awkward the girl does too, but I never thought about its relation with mirror neurons. Thanks for this bit of understanding!

    • @shahab00x - Anytime, man! Glad you found it fruitful.

  • I don't know man young girls these days are a mystery.

  • Ask yourself:
    - Are you being needy?
    - Do you convey confidence?
    - Do you get physical enough?
    - Do you lead the interaction?
    - Are you being a normal cool guy?

    The list can go on. Don't focus on the fact that you're a good guy. Most people are good people, it's not like they're murderers. Don't be a jerk, but don't be afraid to say what you want to say, or do what you want to do either, even if it means losing the girl, or potentially offending someone.

  • "I am a good guy" - THIS is your problem.

    For some stupid reason, girls automatically assume that nice guys are boring too. Son they almost always prefer to date assholes.

    If you're a gentleman, treat her with respect and be nice to her, she's gonna reject you or put you in the friendzone. If you behave like a complete jerk and treat her like crap, she would automatically find you the most desirable and sexy man for her. Cold hard truth.

    So either become a complete asshole and get girls left and right, or wait patiently until you can find a sensible girl who doesn't think that only assholes are 'datable'. believe me, such girls a re a minority, but they do exist.

    Good luck! :)

    • I am starting to believe that actually (as ironically as it is)

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    • I just need to learn how to be an asshole. I have been one before and have been avoided by girls too. Maybe need a fine balance I guess.

      And even funnier, girls don't admit it

    • Girls would never admit this, because they're such hypocrites. And if you forcibly pretend to be an asshole even if that's against your wishes, then girls will pick up on that.

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